Somehow, I am both proud of J.Lo for staying single for a while, AND kind of bummed she hasn’t been swept up again in another romance. She probably needs a Hallmark ending, like, she rents an AirBnb in a cozy Vermont town because the kids are with Marcula for Christmas, and she meets a really hot regular guy roughly her own age who wears a lot of excellent wool cardigans and work boots and in his down time makes very tenderly whittled wooden handicrafts. He doesn’t know who she is and the village conspires not to tell him because they’re overly invested in them ending up together and don’t want her fame to scare him. The proprietor of the old-school DVD rental shop hides all her movies. People suddenly start turning around Us Weekly and People at the grocery store if she’s on the cover. In the end, of course, he’s fine with it all, because he’s already in love with Jenny from the Block and that’s what’s REAL here.
All of which is to say: Here’s J.Lo in an ornate gown at her movie premiere. Now go to Vermont, Jenny!
