You know how we always say that Piper Perabo is unable to walk a red carpet without making the most insane series of facial expressions? It turns out she is also not above using her dress as a prop. I literally could not find a shot wherein she wasn’t doing….something. This may have been intentional, as it is hideous. (Sorry, Piper. But we could see ALL OF YOUR BOOBS and also all the rest of you, and it’s the color of dirty dishwater.) Let’s see what we can piece together.