Wow, Nicole Scherzinger’s solo album MUST have tanked — she is not only back at it awfully fast with the Pussycat Dolls, but she looks about as happy to be there as if someone just came up to her and asked for an autograph because they thought she was Kim Kardashian.

The Pussycat Dolls on the set of their new video.

[Photo: Splash News]

I have to say, though, I’m so glad they’re back. Not because I need to listen to their music — and not because I’m okay with the fact that the REALLY tranny one quit the band — but because they have to much to teach me. They do things with suspenders that I never thought possible. They turn button-down shirts into leotards. They treat tube tops like they’re meant to be worn in public. Nicole looks like she’s filming a Pepto Bismol commercial that will air in space, and I’m pretty sure that one chick up there on the left has a shoulder pad stuck in her bra. All of which means we’ll probably see them at a party, or the supermarket, in these clothes because they like to treat their video costumes like uniforms. Bless. And let’s not forget the most important lesson: Now we all know exactly what to do and wear when the apocalyptic plague of bubbles inevitably arrives. Their assignment for the next video is to teach me how to cope with the interminable months between Lost seasons, although maybe I’ll start by getting a bubble cannon of my own.