Dear Cee-Lo Green,

I enjoy you.

But you need a new assistant, one skilled in keeping you apprised of what day it is. I know you’ve been locked in a cage match with Xtina on a soundstage somewhere — or something — but IT’S JUNE. You can not be running around in a fur-lined coat, because you will give yourself heat prostration and fall over dead and can you imagine what they’ll have to do on The Voice just to deal with that? Carson Daly won’t be able to deal. Hasn’t he already gone through enough in his career? The man was engaged to Tara Reid.

[Photo: Splash]

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