Over the years, we’ve heard tell of the many atrocities worn by Cat Deeley on So You Think You Can Dance, but because I don’t watch the show, I’ve never done anything about it. I can’t help it: I hate that show. Like, a lot. Latter-day dance TV is not my thing, and also, that reminds me, I saw an ad on ABC Family that actually referred to Dirty Dancing as, “The original Dancing With The Stars,” and I almost ran up to my television set and fed it a double-decker knuckle sandwich with a side of rage slaw. I don’t care how secretly wry and cool I think Tom Bergeron might be: Putting Patrick Swayze in the same breath as the show that brought us Kate Gosselin in illusion netting is no way to honor his memory, ABC Family.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, right: Cat Deeley. What she wore the other night was so bad, we got no fewer than ten e-mailed photos from people who found a way to document what was on their TV screens.
First up: a long shot.

From this distance, it appears that Cat was a drive-by casualty in a vicious flamenco dance-off, and also, that she’s standing next to two people who just performed an original dance about cowboy gangs called Western Side Story.
Let’s move in for a close-up — which, I warn you, is very grainy, with apologies from the sender who fearlessly risked life and limb to bring us this intel:


From this vantage point, it’s less flamenco-rumble-gone-awry than Local Woman Struck Down With Raging Boogie Fever In Sale Aisle of Michael’s Arts & Crafts. Hey, it happens. I once caught it in the dairy aisle, and although I didn’t walk away from that experience in costume as someone’s funny valentine, it was still embarrassing when the Ralph’s employee asked me if I needed help finding the Laughing Cow.