You know, we often say that if HBC ever dressed in a standard-issue ball gown, we’d be so bummed. But the thing is, I don’t know that I really would be. Yes, sure, I’d miss the laughs — oh, how we laugh — but lost amid all her red-carpet insanity is that Helena is a really good-looking lady. So I like the fact that she took all the glue-sniffing birds who usually build her outfits and locked them in their cages, just once. This is probably the closest we’re going to get to low-key in the Latter-Day HBC Era, and I plan to enjoy it. Even if she does always wear skirts that make her feet look like they’re on backwards. That’s a problem. Because this is still HBC. And if you told me she’d had her feet removed and then reattached to the opposite ankle just for giggles, I’d be like, “Yeah, that sounds right. Pass the pretzels.”