On the red carpet, Vanessa Hudgens told Ryan Seacrest that when she first picked out this Marchesa dress, it was cocktail-length and they extended it for her. But E!, as was the problem almost all of the night, never panned down to show us the proof.

81st Annual Academy Awards � Arrivals

Even as a cocktail dress, it looks a tiny bit like a crow and a dove made a suicide pact to fly smack into her torso. But also, is that not the laziest way ever to turn a short dress into a gown? I’m sure Georgina Chapman was a little knackered from getting her Fashion Week collection together, but still: “Oh, sure, we’ll just… hmm. GOD, I need a nap. But I can’t keep putting off Harvey by telling him I have to work, or I have a headache, or my appendix is throbbing… Blast. Well, I think I have a yard or three of black left over from making the Fall 2009 collection, I’ll just bung that on the end and we’ll call it a fishtail so maybe I can get some shut-eye before he comes in with the blindfold.”