Back in 2007, we got an e-mail from a girl named Bridgetta Tomarchio in which she complained to us. Not about what we’d written about her on the site, mind you, but about the fact that we filed her under “Random Fug.” See, we hadn’t recognized her name or her face, but according to her, that was an oversight on our part because she’d done tons of stuff, and thus she demanded the “random” label should removed immediately because she was famous. Silly us, she was right: We should’ve recognized her from her work as Red Team Wrestler and Runner #1 in two separate episodes of Poorman’s Beach Bikini, as well as “Model” in Entourage and of course “Contestant” in something called Lingo. And we’ve since seen her in many ads for the erection-enhancer Extenze, so clearly, her star is — ahem — on the rise.
I for one have learned my lesson. I will not soon forget her.
And now, neither will you — because whenever you think fondly upon all the good times you’ve shared with Mr. Snuffleupagus, you’ll remember where you were the day you found out the name of the girl who killed him and turned his feet into boots.