The sheer size of Cindy Crawford’s hair on this cover is the first thing I notice. It’s hilarious to me. It looks like they built it with Photoshop, and I think it’s overshadowing her face just a wee. The rest of her looks fantastic, and the cluster of men at her feet are deeply amusing in their own way. One is clinging to her with a pouty expression, as if she’s just grounded him for missing his curfew and he’s in the throes of a pathetic tantrum. A potential foot fetishist sits below him. Another appears to be fondling her ankle and privately smirking about a spot she might’ve missed with her razor. That dude on the left almost seems to be sitting in a deck chair, oblivious to what’s happening behind him because he’s just trying to catch some rays, and then there’s a guy modeling the hell out of it straight to camera while another worships at the altar of his shoulder. It is a very odd assemblage of bodies and poses and facial expressions, and I wish it had been more worshipful. It’s as if all these dudes were sent off to come up with their own backstories to bring into the shoot, and they’re nearly all terrible. Cindy should be their focus, and somehow — even with her STANDING ON A PILE OF DUDES — she feels like she’s not the center of their world. That’s nutty.

I believe this is a subscriber cover for the current InStyle, which also doubles as the spring fashion issue? I think? It seems weird to have a big Oprah cover and then undercut it with this, and conversely, seems odd to waste Cindy Crawford Stands On A Bunch Of Dudes thusly (apparently there’s also a Natalia Vodianova one, but I haven’t seen it [edited: It was released this morning and I’ve added it at the end of the post], and that ALSO seems like a strange log to throw onto this fire). But, no one asked me, and here we are: Fashion Week starts in New York early this month, and London, Milan, and Paris will follow shortly thereafter, so a Versace story is timely. And this one arose partly from Cindy and the Supers’ surprise closing of September’s runway show. The cover story mixes bites from Cindy with some from Donatella Versace. Per InStyle, Donatella is apparently dedicating this year to her brother and to shoring up the company — interesting that its continued debate over an IPO dovetails with that being a storyline on American Crime Story’s account of Gianni’s death — and wanting to make the brand the biggest. Honestly, I wasn’t aware that it wasn’t already sufficiently huge: It gets TONS of red carpet traction, from a range of people like Heidi Klum, Jessica Chastain, Amy Adams, and Kate Hudson — and whether I always like its direction or not, Donatella has done a really impressive job helming it after getting the gig in tragic circumstances that forced her ascent perhaps earlier than she thought she was ready.

There have been, I gather, rumors that she may step aside — and whether that’s been her choice or not, I don’t know, but all the people mentioned as successors were men. She seems to be fending off those rumors and doubling down on the brand, and I personally hope she sticks around. Maybe she’s exhausted and just wants a long vacation, but this woman has been an and indelible force in fashion and business, and it’d be a shame to lose another female perspective (Phoebe Philo just left Celine) at a time when women are forcing the world to reckon with us.

** Okay, two more are on Laura Brown’s Instagram. Here is Natalia:

That pose is VERY modelesque, as Tyra would say, to the point where I keep worrying she’s going to pull something in her knee.

And here’s Laura Harrier:

Not sure how she fits into the picture overall, but her lipstick is phenomenal. Laura was in Spider Man: Homecoming and has gotten a lot of fashion attention since; she’s tight with Louis Vuitton in particular. I’ve always found her face… a bit expressionless in photos? This is a wee dead-eyed. But her lipstick is fantastic, and often that kind of thing comes with practice. With a role in the Fahrenheit 451 movie, she’ll certainly get plenty of chances to learn the art.

[Photo: InStyle]