Well, the American Idol philanthropy talent show airs tonight, and — SPOILER! — the stylists for that show are still on crack.

I hope it turns out Brooke White was performing in a rousing group medley of
“Chain Gang” and “Jailhouse Rock,” or an
interpretive dance version of what community service might look like –
say, if you were assigned to pick up trash by the side of the road with
one of those long claws. Otherwise, what the hell?

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Of course, given Brooke’s on-air propensity for jabbering at the judges, I imagine the conversation with the stylists may have been a little bit frustrating and maybe it’s not their fault.

STYLIST: I gotta be honest with you, dawg…

BROOKE: Okay.

STYLIST: For me, it isn’t your best…

BROOKE: Yeah. TOTALLY.

STYLIST: … isn’t your best look, I mean…

BROOKE: I completely agree, yes. YES.

STYLIST: Are you going to let me …

BROOKE: It’s all right. No, it’s all right!

STYLIST: What? No, it’s not, you look…

BROOKE: Right. I love your hair tonight!

STYLIST: … you look TERRIBLE IN THAT. YOU ARE NOT TWELVE.

BROOKE: Thank you!

STYLIST: THAT’S NOT A COMPL…

BROOKE: Okay!

STYLIST: I quit.