First off, I have to give props to whomever managed to talk The Powers That Be into approving a movie title that includes: a random exclamation point, a jokey homonym, a colon, and an abbreviation. Applause to you! And rest well at night knowing that you will always be able to get a job at Lifetime: Television For Women, the cable network that never met a colon it didn’t love.

And since you, Brilliant Movie Titler Person, appear to be a miracle worker, could you manage to pop over to Hayden Panettiere’s place during your lunch hour, find this dress,  and secret it somewhere on your person in order to sneak it out of her house and into your office, where you will finish running it through the shredder and thus allow it to die with dignity? Thanks.