Well. I appreciate that Harper’s has limited the cover to just ONE thing I need to buy, as usually it’s more like 638 things that will complete my wardrobe. But let’s talk about its cover decisions — including the choice to have Blake Lively interview Gigi Hadid. It reads like an interview between two pleasant-enough people who did not come into this with any kind of game plan. It’s basically: “Social media hurts!” “Love yourself!” “Retouching creates unrealistic expectations!” Nothing about, or from, either woman that you haven’t heard before — and crucially, nothing that particularly validates having them in conversation. There is no interesting shared perspective driving the conversation, or even an interesting diverging one. It’s literally just words on a page.

BL: Wait, you were asked to prom as a freshman? My God, you were cool. I’m so intimidated now. Do you have your prom pictures on there? Can we go down the Instagram rabbit hole and see all of this? Where did you get your dress?

GH: I never bought a prom dress; I just went in my mom’s closet. We wear the same size shoe and dress, so it was major.

BL: Did you have a “fancy gown” prom, or was it more Laguna Beach? I know, I’ve got high-class reality-TV references.

GH: In Malibu, we wore short dresses to prom because it’s a beach town. The gown situation wasn’t really our thing.

BL: Yeah, my prom situation was full-on Toddlers & Tiaras.

This is not why I would buy a magazine.