Oh, MARY-KATE. There’s so much about you that’s making me happy. Your healthy skin! Your body weight! The fact that your clothes don’t look like you dragged them out of the dumpster behind the local No Tell Motel!

But then…there’s the small issue about the hair:


I…just don’t know what to say. It’s a headband. Of hair. On your forehead. This is Dynasty’s Claudia Blaisdel jogging around the grounds of Denver’s Asylum for the Criminally Insane + the sassy ladies of the Manson family x Jesus. And that is one potent, confused, seriously irreligious cocktail.