Dear Great Britain,

Thank you for being such a good ally to the United States — in this instance, continuing to hold parties and events so that those of us who depend on celebrities leaving the house for writing material aren’t totally arsed out because of that bitch Sandy ruining all of New York’s fun.*

*As a reminder, we’re putting together a post detailing how and where to help victims of the storm.  Remember, the Red Cross needs blood and platelets as well as donations.