Let’s throw the two girls of The City together into this fashion cage match and SEE WHO WINS! As an aside, I’d like to congratulate whoever edited “This Season, On The City” this particular cycle: the music cue you used was PERFECT. It made the entire teaser feel like someone was going to whip out a sword and stab the other, which is exactly — seriously — the way that teaser should feel. Tell your boss to give you a raise. Love, Someone Who Used To Work In Reality Television.

First up, OLIVIA PALERMO, she of the shockingly glossy hair:

DKMS' 4th Annual Gala: Linked Against Leukemia - Arrivals

When I look at this dress, I keep thinking of that scene in Bridget Jones where they ask her why she’s still single and she confides that underneath her clothes, she’s covered in scales. Apparently on our side of the pond, this condition manifests itself in feathers.

And then there’s Whitney:

DKMS' 4th Annual Gala: Linked Against Leukemia - Arrivals

I think I kind of like this because it looks like something one would wear were one magically transported back to a cocktail party in the 60s, and I can’t help but imagine how helpful those sleeves would be during a dramatic conversation that involved a lot of gesticulating. Although I’m pretty sure that if I were magically transported to a 60s cocktail party, I would freak out and get drunk and then my sleeves would trail into a candle and the next thing you know I’d be in a retro burn unit, and how the hell would I find Doc Brown THEN? So maybe it’s a bad idea after all.