I didn’t think it was possible, but it seems the Kardashians have topped last year’s ridiculous holiday card. BEHOLD:

WHO SENDS OUT A HOLIDAY CARD LIKE THIS? For one thing, this lacks any semblance of cheer (the sequins don’t count; also, way to go, Kris, in allowing yourself to be the only person in color, but the color in question is close enough to the wall that you almost look like a floating head; appropriate, perhaps, for the Great and Powerful Oz of this particular family). Additionally, the fact that everyone in the family is wearing a bow tie does not make you guys look boss, it makes you look like a family full of maitre d’s. The additional fact that NONE OF YOU are making eye contact with each other — not even with THE SMALL CHILD ABOUT TO TUMBLE DOWN THE STAIRS — makes you look like asshole maitre d’s, as well as people who hate each other on general principle. And listen, I get that a lot of people are crabby during the holidays, but we FAKE IT. We don’t send out a card that basically says, “We’re probably all trying to poison each other MERRY CHRISTMAS.”