The Summer Doldrums claimed another victim last week. I was devoid of anything to post AND our slideshow function is indefinitely broken, so I got desperate and did a little parody situation involving an old portrait — intending to poke fun at what silly stuff gossips and fuggers would have said in the 1500s if they had our modern slang, but people were concerned I was high out of my mind (nope!), or perhaps in mental distress (blessedly no!), or intentionally demeaning Catholics specifically (nay!). Pretty sure I was already headed to hell before I pretended to be a 16th-century gossip, but for the record: Ignatius of Loyola, I bow to thee and apologize for pretending to be a messy contemporaneous bench who loves drama. For now, I am of sound mind, although we’ll see how long that lasts; I can’t promise I won’t fall into another Getty Images rabbit hole the next time it’s thin on the ground.
Today, I am profoundly grateful to Zendaya today for her tireless work in the promotional arts. Her dial has been turned up to eleven for a month now. This is for Spider-Man in Shanghai, and it’s a Versace from 2016 that we last saw that very year on Amy Adams at the Vanity Fair Oscar party. The netting here is probably supposed to evoke webbing, though ten years ago, we suggested it was from a Fifty Shades of Safeway collection made of Charmin and empty nectarine bags and I actually stand by that. Amy’s bod also did look great in it, though, and so does Zendaya’s here, so there are definitely arguments to be made in favor of it. Donatella’s designs almost never miss on fit, and I love that, but aesthetically I’m not sure Goddess Caught In A Net is my favorite approach (even if this were for The Odyssey). Or am I just thrown off by the microbangs?
What say ye?
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