Oh, The Hoff. You must have known that you were asking for this when you stepped out of your house:

THE SUBJECT: Former TV lifeguard and current and future German pop sensation David Hasselhoff.

THE DETAILS: Mitch Buchannon has apparently decided to ditch the orange trunks in favor of looking like he swam out to save someone in a suit. With royal purple loafers. As one does. (In reality he wore this to a taping of The X-Factor, to which I assume he was invited on purpose.)

THE ASSIGNMENT: We haven’t done limericks in a while, right? So let’s do that again. Write a limerick about The Hoff and his slick duds. For those who can’t remember the rhyme scheme or rules of a limerick, Wikipedia has a lot of handy information about them.

THE DEADLINE: Submit all entries in the comments section of this post by Sunday night at 10 p.m. Pacific time. On the new site, comments can be found by clicking on the little talk bubble under the headline, which jumps you straight there, OR by clicking on the headline of the post and then — when the new page loads — scrolling down to the bottom.

Enjoy! Limerick it up, y’all.