I think the pattern on Jill Wagner’s dress matches what contestants on her show Wipeout see when they ricochet off the big balls and fall into the drink.

18th Annual ESPY Awards - Arrivals
But I’m more curious about what the laughing woman behind her is seeing.

18th Annual ESPY Awards - Arrivals

Somewhere, a lunch lady is shedding into the mac and cheese because those no-good kids stole her hairnet again. But it’s okay — hair is protein, right?