When I look at this, most of what I think is: Did the interns get put in charge? Was everyone¬†out sick for the entire process of figuring out this cover?¬† This month marks Anna Wintour’s 30th anniversary at Vogue, and they went with “Happy Birthday, Fashion Fund”?!? Quick, everyone, get out your noisemakers and poppers and party hats! Pop the bubbly! It’s a committee’s birthday!!!!! That’s like cancelling the honorary Oscar and instead giving an award to the Academy accountants. This only works if “Fashion Fund” is everyone’s pet name for A-Dubs. I am forced to assume that everyone who knew about Anna’s big anniversary — including Anna — went to Hawaii and threw their phones into the ocean, leaving some poor 21-year old intern with the task of coming up with cover lines. Picture it: “How about, ‘Also: Chrissy Teigen,” Intern #1 says, eyes on the floor. Then Intern #2 rushes in clutching a piece of paper in her fist and shouts, “Tattoo and tiara start with the same letter!” And then the photographer sits up with a jolt, types, and turns around his laptop with a gleam in his eye to reveal a photo of Cameron Diaz in There’s Something About Mary. Everyone cheers, and then blows off the rest of the day to drink artisanal cocktails out of sustainable leather pouches.

The story is a very pleasant, light, meandering Claire Foy 101: nothing shocking, nothing hilarious, nothing annoying (about her; naturally, there has to be a comment on what she ate and how she is trying to gain weight post-Lisbeth), which will leave you with a nice affectionate feeling for about 15 minutes, and then you’ll move about your day. Nothing wrong with that, and hey, at least it wasn’t written by a co-star or a friend or Peter Morgan.

[Photos: Vogue]