There’s something sour and uninspired about Natalie Portman’s demeanor here (as also evidenced by the other pics in the slideshow, one of our brand-spanking-new capabilities). Now, maybe it’s because she can feel her own eyes boring into her back, or maybe somebody said, “Look, Natty, people might not recognize you as the fierce face on the poster if you don’t seem a little depressed and also wear red lipstick.” But…. wearing black to her Black Swan premiere seems a tad on-the-nose, no? Granted, this could be worse — it could have feathers — but the droopy “wings” on her shoulders, the heavy lip and blank facial expression… they’re all a trifle too apt. I mean, she didn’t wear a dress made of teabags to the premiere of The Darjeeling Express, nor anybody’s brother to Brothers, nor the titular magic shop to the lamentable debut of Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium, unless she counted “wonder emporium” as a euphemism for something else, in which case I assume she did have that with her.

Wouldn’t you want people to see you at the premiere of a dark thriller looking sunny and cheerful and glowy, so as to think you are a better actress? Not that long ago I gave her props for appearing to do just that. Sigh. Maybe she’s just depressed that she might get nominated for an Oscar and have to sit through Anne Hathaway and James Franco being really weird and self-satisfied while hosting the telecast. I feel you, Natty. It’s a bummer. But your reviews are not, so how about we perk up a tad?
[Photos: Getty,]