VMAs: Crazy Performance Fugnanigans


Or as I said to Jessica, the night Miley Cyrus became LMFAO Minaj. Do we think her tongue obsession came BEFORE this outfit, or because of it?

Note: Sadly this isn’t a Fug the Hellshow of the whole thing; just of what people wore during notable performances. I couldn’t bring myself to go into this again THAT deep, and I say that as someone who watched Sharknado TWICE. So you know this was bad.

[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (147):

  1. Jules
    +77

    Miley is absurd. And Robin Thicke is gross. If I say Beetlejuice 3 times, will they BOTH go away?

    • Kris
      +15

      Am I the only one who noticed how bored Robin Thicke looks in all the pictures? Apparently he’s over Miley’s schtick already.

      • Caro
        +7

        Well, I’ve been over his questionable schtick since he arrived on the scene. I’ll never understand his appeal.

        • sarah
          +3

          This. Plus, I do think it’s unfair how most of the criticism is going Miley’s way. Yes: she is too young and apparently has no people who care for her around her. But Thicke is an adult this makes him nothing but a sad pervert.

          • sarah
            +3

            Correction: Miley’s probably not too young. It’s the age difference and the fact that it’s provocation without any actual skill or art that makes this so jarring.

            I’m no Gaga fan, but at least she owns her own sexuality. If that makes sense.

  2. Brenna
    +20

    Why in the world did Robin Thicke dress like Beatlejuice?

    I get that Miley is trying to shed her Disney image, and I actually don’t mind her a lot of the time, but this is just silly – she doesn’t need to try so hard; this all just looks desperate.

    Loved JT’s performance, even if we only got 45 seconds of NSYNC. He and Bruno Mars were just head and shoulders above everybody else last night.

    • julyol1972
      +29

      Right??? I was on board the Miley train for a minute there as she did her thing with the hair and the change in style. But the last couple months, her “thing” has been out of control. I get she’s trying to burn her Disney image on a bonfire, but at this point, she needs to stop the madness, and rein it in for a minute or two. Chica is going too hard, and it reeks of desperation.

      And love me some Robin Thicke, but having Miley grind on your nethers is not the look you want Paula to remember every time she looks at you.

  3. Anna
    +5

    So wait, Miley in some nude pleather is problematic, but I have not seen ANYONE on the Internets today outraged (or faux-outraged) over Gaga’s g-string and pasties!

    • Other Emily
      +53

      With Gaga, we have seen it all before. Like, ALL of it. And it’s what she’s been doing forever. So it just doesn’t shock anymore. Miley is still so, so young, and this is such a strange and yucky change from what she used to be like that it’s unsettling and unappealing. I totally understand that we all go through a stage where we want to show how grown-up we are, but this is plain old sad. I hope Paula Patton tore Robin Thicke a new one when he got home last night. Although I suspect he didn’t particularly enjoy the event anyway.

      • Maria L.
        +24

        We get it. She can’t stop; she won’t stop. But we can all just yawn. Shock value does not equal entertainment value. (BTW this little chick cannot dance. It was pretty cringe-worthy.)

        I have to laugh at Thicke’s outfit; he looks like a carnival shyster. I expected him to try to peddle some patent medicine after awhile.

        • julyol1972
          +46

          Imagine my surprise this morning, to hear my 15 year old hopping mad about Miley’s shennanigans last night. It was actually quite amusing to hear my teenager, who loved Hannah Montana as a child, go off on Miley for not only walking around with no clothes, but also for grinding innappropriately on a much older man, and then having the gall (her words) to call that crap dancing. Otherwise, known as ‘twerking”. She lfinally aunched into a mini-rant about Miley’s constant need for attention and seemingly lack of any discernible skill recently, other than airing her parts in public.

          To say I was proud of my kid at that moment is to put it mildly.

          • steph527
            +16

            My 15 year old daughter said to me, Miley is trying to look sexy but she looks like she is just an annoying kid with a foam finger. Not sexy just dumb and annoying.

      • Caro
        +3

        Yeah, I’m sure he had absolutely ZERO to do with this performance–have you seen his video?

    • Beth C.
      +52

      I don’t think the nude pleather was really the problem. It’s ugly as sin, but really, the problem was ugly nude pleather PLUS horrid dancing, PLUS too much tongue wagging, PLUS creepshow situation with Thicke. Put it all together and you get horrid.

      If it were just the outfit I don’t think people would have a problem beyond the fact that it’s just ugly, because on it’s own it’s really just whatever.

      • Rebecca
        +26

        Agreed. Ugly, over-revealing costumes-eh, we are used to that. But at least back it up with some talent. Good dancing, good singing. Don’t make the performance just an excuse to hump around on stage and mime sex gestures.

    • Tiffany
      +22

      I guess IMO, Miley didn’t show any kind of talent. Gaga might not be everyone’s thing, but I think most agree she has musical talent. She isn’t the best dancer, but she is still a good dancer. Miley wasn’t dancing…she was just trying to be as crude as possible. It is obvious and boring, really.

    • nicolegrr
      +18

      Also, with Gaga, she at least seems to be dressing for herself, maybe for her fans, and to shock people generally, as a sort of performance art. Although she’s often half naked, she’s just as often buried under tons of fabric, so she doesn’t strike me as selling herself as a sex toy. She seems to hold herself out as an independent woman who happens to make controversial clothing choices. In contrast, Miley’s performance was all about sex, and mostly in the context of her flinging it at an older, indifferent man. It was a much more dependent, almost subservient approach, in my opinion. If she’d been standing strong, belting out her songs, and dancing in a self-respectful way, I don’t think the outfit would have bothered me as much.

  4. sara
    +8

    Wait a minute. Was JT wearing a DICKEY??

    • Brenna
      +5

      I think he was – when he accepted the last award, he’d taken his jacket off and he looked like a pilgram.

    •  Chasmosaur
      +3

      It looks like the shirt he was wearing was two-tone – faux black dickey on top, white button-down on the bottom. Or did he change from his performance?

  5. qwertygirl
    +55

    I am completely over Miley and her Tongue. She’s cheap and trasy and I wish she’d go away. The only redeeming thing about her is that she sings “Party in the USA” and my children think the chorus is, “There’s a bunny in the USA” and they go around singing it and that makes me laugh. Everything else about her is just awful. And based on…pretty much everything here, I can say I’m really glad I didn’t waste however many hours of my life watching this, and I’m sorry Heather had to (although maybe she enjoyed it because, as the Fug Girls always say, I don’t know her life).

    • Kristan
      +52

      +1 for bunny in the USA. :)

    • Daisy Bateman
      +11

      Someone on twitter said she had turned into Bill the Cat, and now that’s all I see. (Ack!) (Love me some Bloom County.)

      • qwertygirl
        +3

        OMG, that’s FANTASTIC. And–ugh–true. I’m with you on Bloom County tho–oop ack!

  6. Daenerys
    +15

    Miley- have some more respect for yourself, girl! Prancing around in nude-coloured top and bottoms as a stand-in for the topless women in Thicke’s video- that’s just tacky and sad.

  7. gpleigh
    +30

    I don’t get the popularity of this no talent desperately needy circus clown, Miley Cyrus. And for the love of God, could someone please get her to keep that grotesque tongue in her mouth? Just beyond crass and pathetic.

    • Kris
      +13

      I think it’s stuck, actually, and she’s torn between hoping that no one will notice and pleading with her eyes for help. Next week’s Star and US Weekly will have dueling stories about Miley being rushed to the hospital for an emergency tonguectomy while Budget Hemsworth (as Annie S. called him) weeps at her side. The week after that, Miley’s publicist will be hotly denying rumors that her tongue is actually a silicon prosthetic.

    • Kristin
      +5

      I found myself wondering, “does smoking weed cause thrush?”

  8. Lizzy
    +16

    Gah, I feel so old because all I can think is, “Put some clothes on and behave, young lady!” (and that does not apply exclusively to Miley Cyrus). The ‘tray hard’, it is exhausting.
    Insert comment about how yes, video did kill the radio star, and they’re now twerking on its grave.

    • Lizzy
      +1

      Ugh – that’s “TRY hard”

      • Dana
        +2

        Considering her recent use of “ratchet ” for wretched, tray instead of try is fitting.

        • Mimi
          0

          I found out recently that “ratchet” is the ghetto slang for “wretched,” so she didn’t make it up, believe it or not.

  9. jean
    +20

    I think we all accept that Lady Gaga is a total exhibitionist, but it’s still hard to swallow from Hannah Montana. Plus there’s a slight age difference. Gaga is making a cynical, adult choice in her onstage persona. Miley’s seems like an immature choice, but also cynical. Both are depressing, but cynical behavior in the young seems sadder to me. I won’t go so far as to say she’s being exploited because she is an adult, mostly.

    Give me those One Direction goofballs any day of the week. Yeah, it’s all market-tested, but they do seem age appropriate. And dressed.

    • julyol1972
      +6

      Agree with most of everything you said, except pertaining to One Direction. Manufactured boy band is all well and good, but they’ve only cleaned up their image this side of the pond. Harry Styles in particular is a young hellion back home, and charges of drug abuse and sexual antics whilst on the X Factor and in the group were a big scandal at one point.

      Honestly, nowadays the adage that, the more naked and scandalous the behavior, the more noteriety, and music one will sell. Madonna cultivated it, and these youngsters are off and running with it.

      • Rayna
        +2

        Sad but true, innit?

      • jean
        0

        I had no idea about their rep on X Factor. A pity. Please don’t ruin my fantasy that the Big Time Rush dudes really are as charming and dorky as they seem :^).

  10. azqueenie
    +30

    That referee comment on slide five was pure gold.

  11.  maevej
    +8

    As gross as I thought Miley’s performance was, keep in mind that Britney’s flesh colored bodysuit VMA appearance happened when she was 18 and her kiss with Madonna was at the ripe old age of 21.

    • jean
      +2

      But that’s the problem when the bar is set so low. I guess I want to see the next female Justin Timberlake, not the next Brittany. Or maybe that’s Taylor Swift? Is she the next Justin? Did Selena Gomez perform? Tweeners seem to love her.

      • Mimi
        +1

        Oh please! Justin Timberlake isn’t that great! I mean, he’s better than most, but he’s by no means the musical god that all wannabes should aspire to.There are plenty of current female performers who are as good as he.

    • Katty McNiley Ripley
      +29

      Yes, point taken…. but Britney wasn’t behaving like a “Nudist Deft Chipmunk on Steroids”.

      • Jessica
        +55

        I will say that at least when Britney was rocking the flesh toned bodysuit, that was something from HER video, not some dude’s, AND her dancing was ON POINT. I actually don’t totally mind the ESCANDELO NUDITY at the VMAs — it IS the VMAs — as long as there’s a point to it, or you at least are BRINGING IT otherwise. Miley was just waggling her butt up there.

        •  Mel
          +10

          YASSSS! Britney at her prime. Can we get that back in exchange for the hot mess that was Miley’s “performance”?

        • julyol1972
          +18

          Agree! And please note, they captured a picture of the Smith kids watching Miley on said stage, on one of the entertainment sites. The look of utter horror on their faces was hilarious. Goes to show that not all the young ‘uns get her either.

          • Chickiehead
            +3

            Actually, for the record, the Smith family was reacting to LaGaGa.

          • Jacque
            0

            Haven’t they seen the way their tween daughter dresses? Besides, they weren’t watching Cyrus at the time–a little bit of media maneuvering.

        • Sarah Ashley
          +25

          Yes. At least Britney’s nude outfit was pants. And it had sparkles. And her hair was pretty. And it was a good performance.

        • Tiffany
          +10

          As a dancer, I never thought Britney was that great (Beyonce, Ciara, Shakira were far better dancers to me). I always thought Brit was similar to JLo in that she could pose very well on stage.

          However, Miley’s moves make Britney look like a dance genius! Miley didn’t look like she would pass as a PROFESSIONAL in any of the things she was doing up there : singing, dancing, posing. Britney was dancing in a sexy way, not simply miming sexual acts.

    • I
      +62

      She began the performance by using black girls as props, and ended the performance by being a prop for Robin Thicke’s performance of his misogynist trainwreck. It was a pretty horrific performance for a lot of reasons, and the latex underwear isn’t one of them.

      •  jay
        +2

        people have been frothing at the mouth over all this for thousands of words and you summed it up perfectly in two sentences. Sincerely, thanks for that. I am literally going to point to this comment if I have to explain this situation to, say, my mom.

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +9

      Britney did get sexualized way too much, way too young (I mean, it started when she was 16), but that flesh-colored bodysuit, while extremely sexy, was also gorgeous. And, the move in revealing it was genuinely witty. And, it covered her. And, as already noted – she could dance, which really does make a huge difference.

      Basically, the artistic maturity of the entire performance went a very long way in minimizing any potentially creepy effect. It was playful, but polished.

      And that’s what we’re not getting with Miley. It’s like someone told a little kid, “Go up there and have fun.” Which is great from the kid’s POV, but it doesn’t make good watching as an audience member.

      • ChristieLea
        +11

        Exactly. Britney may have stripped down to nude bra and pants, but then she danced the HELL out of that number. And, said nude outfit still kept all of Brit’s parts in the right place.

        Miley just ran around flailing all her limbs (and tongue) in latex granny panties (I never thought I’d say those words) that didn’t even fit right. Just…NO.

  12. AJ
    +22

    Gaga didn’t grind on a man 16 years her senior or keep rubbing herself whilst singing. Actually, her performance was really quite time.

    Anyway, JT for president! Remaining ‘NSync members for the cabinet!

    • AJ
      +8

      And by time I mean tame.

    • Laura
      +19

      A MARRIED man sixteen years her senior. While his wife was in the audience. I completely agree with Brooklyn Decker’s tweet: “I’m so uncomfortable”.

  13. Fawn
    +17

    This just makes me sad. Up to this point, Miley had completely wooed me over to her side. I was full-on “Team Miley!”. Now, it’s like we’ve gone back in time about 2 years, and I just haaaaaate her and desperately want Liam Hemsworth to run as fast as he can.

  14.  TaraMisu
    +25

    Ugh…. I just can’t with Miley. I understand wanting to change your image from Disney kid to grown up, but she needs to cut this shit out. Not the way to go about it. I feel like a pearl-clutcher but damn………..

    •  Billie
      +9

      I am in complete agreement.

      Miley, please refer to Hilary Duff.

      • julyol1972
        +2

        Specifically, Hilary Duff pre-baby! Please don’t put thoughts in Miley’s head about procreating.

  15. CakesOnAPlane
    +8

    While her behavior and attire was offensive, what was most offensive to me (as a musician, and as a person with ears) is that she did not his ONE NOTE. I mean, isn’t this supposed to be your job? (insert comment about how naive I am and out of touch with the way the music industry works today)

    I would have much preferred these ladies to duet with Thick: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/23/gender-reversed-blurred-lines-parody-music-video_n_3639406.html

    Talk about talent!

    • CakesOnAPlane
      0

      behavior and attire WERE offensive, not “was”. Sorry!

    • scone
      +23

      Her singing AND her dancing was terrible. When Britney went full bodysuit, she could still DANCE.

    • Kris M
      +2

      That parody is fantastic. NSFW, but I think it hits the mark on it’s message. And those women sound amazing.

  16. Kris M
    +24

    I don’t think anyone is saying that Miley’s performance was the worst ever and she’s the most nude person ever and that no one has ever done as immature and grotesque a performance as that. Yup, Britney did it, yes, Lady Gaga does it, and we all had something to say about that. If we just start to accept it, then it’s only going to get worse. I’m happy to still hear people say, “that performance was terrible” because all she did was skip around grabbing herself and grinding against a 37 year old man. No one’s saying it’s new, we’re just saying it’s still terrible.

  17. MollyD
    +5

    #1 – Miley, whatever.
    #2 – How long was GaGa’s song that she could make this many costume changes and YAY for the Carol Channing reference!
    #3 – Those pants did Robin no favors. At ALL.

  18.  Miriam
    +14

    I didn’t think I could laugh any harder, but then KANYE! Pure genius (Heather, not him).

  19. kathotdog
    +4

    I know nothing of wigs other than the cheap ones I wear at Halloween, but how does one change wigs so fast, and how do they stay on when being flipped upside down? Is there a chin strap? Staples?
    As for Miley…this just seems like one of those I-don’t-have-time-to-deal-with-choreography-so-I’ll-just-dress-slutty-and-have-a-lot-of-stuff-on-the-stage.

  20. mary lou bethune
    +5

    Miley is so gross – but all this talk about the tongue — why didn’t they get orthodontia for her teeth?

    • Jacque
      +4

      I thought we weren’t supposed to discuss people’s physical characteristics on here, least of all when the subject is just out of her teens. Hope it makes you feel good.

  21. HKS
    +2

    I know nearly everything in the above slideshow was from terrible performances. HOWEVER, without those performances, we wouldn’t have this AMAZING slideshow. So….I am not upset with anyone in the above pics. Thank you for providing something awesome for the Fug Girls to be hilarious about. Particularly these two:

    #1: Lady Gaga priestess.
    #2 KAPSY KANYE (I figure he’d do the whole K thing now too).

  22.  Mel
    +2

    Ugh…PLEASE. JUST. STOP.

  23. Boricua in Texas
    +15

    Gross. If she is going to be showing it so much, Miley needs to invest in a tongue scraper. They are not expensive.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tongue_cleaner

    • Tiffany
      +3

      EXACTLY! Clean that if you are going to have it hanging everywhere!

  24. Kathy
    +8

    Please for the love of God’s green goodness – someone buy Miley a tongue scraper.

  25. Rose
    +15

    And Katy Perry is the NORMAL, SANE one at an awards show. I think I’m in shock.

    (Sidenote: I adore Ms. Perry. I just feel that we all expect a certain level of over-the-top-ness from her that was not quite met here and I am not sure how to feel about it.)

  26.  Charlotte
    +2

    That Miley Cyrus performance made me embarrassed for her. I actually think she has some vocal talent, and if you read her Twitter/interviews with her she seems like an intelligent young lady. She could be *so much more* that just a prop for Robin Thicke’s questionable (to put it lightly) song. I can’t figure out if she just has low self-esteem, or if she honestly thinks she’s being cool.

    Gaga was ho-hum. I’m actually a fan of hers, but I still think she should have waited a bit longer before staging a “comeback”. Waited longer and brought new material with her. She can’t be the next Madonna (if that’s indeed what she wants) if she’s totally played out by the time she’s thirty.

  27.  Charlotte
    +2

    And I don’t even know what “twerking” is and I hate it. Mostly because it always reminds me of the Missy Elliot song “Work It,” and then I realize that that song came out over a decade ago, and then I feel old.

    • qwertygirl
      +5

      Twerking is a dance move that involves a person shaking the hips in an up-and-down bouncing motion, causing the dancer to shake, “wobble” and “jiggle.” To “twerk” means to “dance in a sexually suggestive fashion by twisting the hips.” I had to look it up, but that’s what it is. I’m sure if Miley Cyrus is a fan of it, I would find it objectionable (see: tongue, excessive sticking out of, and behavior, inappropriate).

    • julyol1972
      +12

      Miley was TRYING to “twerk”, she didn’t. It involves a lot more than sticking your parts in his groin, and using your tongue like a windsheild wiper.

      As qwertygirl noted, it involves rotatiing the hips A LOT! It is also an almost exact replica of the type of dancing done in the islands – though it’s not called twerking there, we call it “wining”. Rihanna did it a plenty when she was home for Canival earlier this month, where the music, costumes, and atmosphere create the right setting.

      The reason everyone is objecting to Miley’s depiction of it, is that a) she can’t dance, and b) wrong context.

      The producer who okay’d that trainwreck in rehersals should be fired, for thinking this was acceptable. And Robin better sleep with one eye open for a while. Paula may have went along with the idea at the time, but I’m sure she’s not too happy with the backlash today.

      • Jessica
        +10

        As I said to a friend today, “I am sure actual twerking is much more precise than this.”

        • Guerra
          +2

          In my country it’s perreo it’s like dancing doggy style lol!!! But much much better then Miley!

  28. Mikki
    +39

    Not that I’m clutching my pearls in shock, but what I’m curious about is why are all the male musicians wearing shirts practically all buttoned up to their chins, and the women are all dressed like strippers? Some nude equality please!

  29. na
    0

    It’s important to remember that at one point, Miley could actually sing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWXNVIDkteA

  30. EmSpeaks
    +29

    Much like his character in “Thor,” Chris Hemsworth needs to sit his brother down for a talking-to about his life choices.

    • DelusionalLeggings
      +3

      My thoughts exactly!

    • Maya
      +3

      I’m really shocked by all the cruel, and derogatory comments aimed at someone who is essentially still a kid. OK, so you didn’t like her performance–it doesn’t mean she is EVIL (or unworthy of love from the likes of bad actor Hemsworth). I really hope none of you have daughters because obviously you have some sort of innate distaste for females (only females–never has there ever been anything about a guy on this site comparable to this meanfest) who don’t conform to your narrow views of how a person should act. And I am probably older than most of you, so I can’t help but be amused by the insane degree of pearl clutching that’s accompanying the slut-shaming. UGH.

      • Hodge
        0

        OK, so I’m late with this comment, but GIVE ME A BREAK. This girl is in the entertainment industry, willingly prancing around sem-nude onstage with her tongue hanging down to her knees, offering this so-called “performance” to her audience. I don’t see any comments on here that she didn’t earn. She may have talent but it surely wasn’t apparent that night. Criticism comes with the job.

  31. ronnie
    +18

    I thought I was the only one that thought not only was Miley’s “performance” amateurish and unseemly but also somewhat racist… and then I read this on Vulture… http://www.vulture.com/2013/08/jody-rosen-miley-cyrus-vmas-minstrel.html

  32. Cecily
    +4

    Priestess from Planet Jigsaw, bahaha!

    Yahoos indeed…

  33. Sajorina
    +12

    I CAN’T! If she at least had the talent to back off all the ridiculousness, like Gaga does, I’d be like “She’s RIDICULOUS, but at least she can sing/dance/play an instrument/write a good song”! But she’s just making a fool out of herself and I refuse to participate in it! I didn’t watch the performance and I’m sorry I’ll miss the clever commentary of the slideshow… I’M DONE!

  34. Mongerel
    +7
    •  HelenBackAgain
      +3

      Everything in there is so on point! I don’t know how he thought of all of them, but they’re all deadly accurate. Mean? Maybe. But hilarious. And she did TOTALLY ask for it.

    • ohsohappy
      +4

      Oh my gawd! I have laughed myself into an asthmatic coughing fit of sorts, and I don’t even have asthma! That is hysterical!!!!! She will be mortified when she sees the photo of her bum next to the apple! Thanks, Mongerel! Too dang funny!

  35. Aaarrrghh
    +13

    Why has no one commented on how she’s surrounded by PEDO BEARS?!!!! That was more disturbing when put into the context of her grinding with Robin Thicke. I’m a pearl clutcher on this one for sure.

  36. Heather
    +6

    Wait, Heather: you watched Sharknado TWICE? And lived to tell about it?

  37.  HelenBackAgain
    +2

    So, getting to Gaga and Perry – they both did their schticks, with which I’m fine. I didn’t see the performances, though I may take a look at a re-run this evening (it was Breaking Bad night!), but I’m totally okay with their chosen looks. Even Gaga’s thong. I mean, it’s just very her. True, it’s tired at this point, but it’s still normal within the Gaga-verse.

  38. Erin
    0

    Justin shut it DOWN. The cameras panned to 1 Direction for a second, and I don’t think they knew what to do with themselves.

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +1

      I just can’t stand him. If I do watch the re-run later, I’ll skip his part.

      •  mepe
        +1

        I’m with you HelenBackAgain! I can’t stand him and absolutely don’t get the appeal!

  39. Jen
    +5

    A lot of true things have already been said about Miley, so I won’t repeat them. JT’s performance was amazing, but my enjoyment was lessened by the fact that they cut to Taylor Swift approximately every 1.7 seconds during his performance. WHY? I like her well enough, but I like JT a lot more. I would rather, you know, WATCH him while he is performing. Not TSwift reacting to him.

  40. Andrew S.
    +4

    all anyone needs to know about Katy’s performance is that it was stolen from La Lopez –

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gNHJkQysSkw

  41. Maura
    +17

    How about we just give Miley a t-shirt that says I HATE YOU DAD, and she can just wear that and skip all this tiresome garbage?

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +14

      With, on the back, “BUT PLEASE LOVE ME.”

      • Vandalfan
        +2

        Exactly, you guys, exactly.

        Though it might say “I hate you dad AND mom AND Walt Disney, Inc., too, and everyone else who sexualized my childhood for their profit.”

  42. Megan
    +4

    I interrupt your scheduled and necessary pearl-clutching to note that Miley looks very fit. Nice muscle tone in her limbs and abs.

    Please, Miley…more of the exercise endorphins, less of the molly. I promise you won’t regret it when you’re old.

    • ohsohappy
      +2

      Very little muscle tone in that bum, however. See Mongerel’s buzzfeed link. LOL

  43. katkin74
    +8

    I read that she likened her “style” to crossing “white trash and Chanel”. IMO the only reason she’s Chanel at all is b/c she can afford it. The white trash part is in her blood. This is whore-endous. If I did that, my father would kill me – if the contemptuous, disgusted look from my mother didn’t instantly turn me to ash first. NO CLASS, and no respect – for herself, or her family. I’m beginning to think The Hems is on to something, trying to divert his brother away from this wreck. RUN AWAY LIAM.

  44. Chickiehead
    0

    What was Justin wearing, though? It looked a little bit like a dickie to me.

    Miley. I stick my tongue out like that when I’m puking. That’s what I felt like doing while watching her do whatever she was doing. Had to laugh that Robin Thicke wasn’t paying her any attention. I think he was avoiding touching her at all. Who could blame him?

  45. Becky
    +42

    Aside from the obvious gross-out antics, piss-poor dancing, hyper-sexualization on stage, and sad sad singing, the biggest thing that made the Miley thing awkward was her trying to posture herself as a “thug.”

    It’s one thing to be a white kid like Eminem, who grew up poor and disadvantaged in an environment where rap and a rough street life was part of HIS experience and culture. It’s a totally different one when a rich white kid, who grew up very wealthy and privileged in a country singer’s household tries to co-opt thug culture (her words) and “sound black” (also her words recently to her producer).

    In addition to that, she’s trying to twerk, pull gang signs, and surrounds herself with big bootied black women without human heads, as her backup dancers. Talk about dehumanizing! The whole thing wreaks of white privilege from a rich Disney white kid, whose experience comes off as totally inauthentic, because she’s just playing dress-up.

    This isn’t Miley. It’s Miley trying desperately to be outrageous by co-opting some of the most risque parts of thug culture – one that’s not at all her own. And when she’s bored with it, she can go back to being a rich white girl because it’s like she’s just had a good laugh wearing blackface on stage for all of America. And we’re all too focused on her latex undergarments to notice the inherent racism and insensitivity she was parading around in with her performance.

    • Jessica
      +10

      Extremely thoughtfully said. Thank you for this. I actually just finished reading an interesting piece about this very topic on New York as well: http://www.vulture.com/2013/08/jody-rosen-miley-cyrus-vmas-minstrel.html

      And Anne Helen Peterson had a fascinating and smart take on it as well:
      http://www.annehelenpetersen.com/?p=3311

      Miley is not getting thoughtful guidance on a lot of topics; that sounds glib, but I actually mean it quite seriously. Why has no one said to her what you just pointed out? Because she’s the gravy train?

      • julyol1972
        +1

        Miley’s the new Vanilla Ice, co-opting a culture that she pulls on and off like a shirt when the cameras are near by. Like Becky said, Enimen has been accepted by the black community because he’s the real deal – with no airs, just his truth. Miley however, is at this point, making a mockery of the black culture,, and artists that do that find themselves very quickly on the outside, the butt of the joke, with no credibility. I went to my hair salon today, and Miley’s all anybody was talking about, and not in a good way. Ironically, most of the anger comes from what she did with the black back-up dancer. That act, more than the grinding on Robin, has folks really upset.

        Miley’s performance got her the attention she craved. I just don’t think it will ultimately be the one she wanted.

        • Maura
          +4

          To be fair to Vanilla Ice (!), he wasn’t just some random white guy who decided to start rapping to make a profit on it either. He also was, at least in his youth, the real deal, a breakdancer and battle rapper. And then it just went downhill. So very very fast.

          •  HelenBackAgain
            +1

            That’s true. Vanilla Ice grew up surrounded by guys doing all the same things he was; he was just the only white one. And he was a very good dancer.

            What seems weird to me is that he’s doing rock now. (And it’s awful.)

    • esther
      +7

      THIS 100%

      It’s the same thing that bothers me about Beiber. Ok yes, he was ‘discovered’ and adopted by Usher, but he’s a pretty white boy from Canada who plays the guitar for heaven’s sake. How much less ‘thug’ or ‘hip hop’ could you get?

      Miley should put on some jeans and a plaid shirt and get her guitar out again.

      • Becky
        +2

        I get your point about Bieber too, but I feel like he was at least “discovered” and taken into Usher’s label, and adopted a lot of his current sound under his guidance. It may not all be his own experience (like did we really believe him when he was like 14 singing about lovemaking and “if I was your boyfriend”? Not really.) But at least it came from someone mentoring him, introducing him to the sound, and whatnot. And I’m not a Belieber, so I don’t follow his daily antics, but he still talks like a pretty innocent kid, even though he sort of mugs like an annoying teen punk.

        Maybe there’s someone guiding Miley in this way too? I don’t know. But she’s not just trying to adopt a sound, she’s mascarading as a person totally foreign to her from all accounts, making a lot of money off of it, and dehumanizing the people who she treats like props on stage with her.

        Thanks, Jess, for sharing those other articles. As much as I’m tired of hearing about Miley today, I’m hoping that some of these critical pieces may get her to think about the messages she sends to young white people about her own privilege and also to young POC about the marginalization of their own.

    • I
      +6

      Yes thank you, exactly this.

      May I also add that it’s kinda disgusting to me that Miley gets all the slut-shaming backlash (because apparently her nakedness/raunchiness was worse than her racism…), while no one cares about THICKE’s part in this? Where’s the outrage directed at him?!

      This performance was a train-wreck but most people are complaining for all the wrong reasons.

      •  HelenBackAgain
        +2

        I think Thicke started out as an unapologetic, thoroughgoing misogynist, so there’s no surprise there. Nothing’s changed.

        Cyrus used to have an act you could take your kids to see, not long ago at all, and her racism is also new – at least to the audience.

      • Jacque
        +3

        I so agree! Some people are even acting as though he had no idea what was going down and that suddenly her antics were INFLICTED on him. Give me a break. Isn’t he pushing 40?

  46. Lily1214
    +4

    I saw the “performance” via the internet. She moved clumsily around the stage and appears to have no talent for dancing. I’m still not sure she can actually sing. The tongue action was embarrassing; I couldn’t make the connection between her tongue and the desperate “dancing” she was doing. She needs to start therapy to see if she can get some of her confused thinking straightened around.

  47. Gary Davidson
    0

    The photos make me so glad that I am a fan of Jazz where the music is the whole thing. I am SO bored with these people, their antics, absurd ” clothing” and apparent idea that they invented sex. Most of us would at least smirk at the mix of a 20 yo grinding her butt into a grown man’s crotch in the relative “privacy” of a club but as part of a “performance”……
    Miley’s shoes in the 1st photo look orthopedic and it looks like she is wearing support hose. Lady Gaga, what can I say, bored with her. You watched Sharknado TWICE !?!?!?!?! You poor dear thing. They have medication for that now !!!!!!

  48. TonyG
    +13

    I noticed something.

    With all this talk about Miley, no one noticed that Robin Thicke sounded horrible on a song that has basically a 5 note range.

    Well played, Robin Thicke.

  49. Lola
    +6

    Did anyone notice that One Direction and Rihanna and her buddies appeared to be trying to stifle laughs at Miley at the end of her thing. ? First they looked annoyed/bewildered- but then they were laughing at her. Henry Styles and Ri Ri were hiding their faces trying no to laugh. Poor Miley. Well, actually I don’t feel that sorry for her- I found her Gene Simmons schtick revolting and then the Penis/index finger puppet porn gross—- but I bet she didn’t expect to annihilate her image to such derision.

  50.  Jill
    +1

    Miley aside, I’m seriously looking forward to all of the JTSwift fanfic that’s being written right this minute.

  51. Miss Bea Heyvin
    +1

    This is what you do when you have mediocre musical talent. Madonna was the first and Miley won’t be the last. Miley and her management team are just trying to get a few more miles out of an already declining career.

  52. greatwhitenorthchick
    0

    Since Day One of Hannah Montana, I’ve found Miley Cyrus to be one of the most unappealing, profoundly untalented young performers around. I hope (though doubt) she has a Plan B.

  53. Caro
    +1

    MEOW!! Somebody instituted Mean Girl time and I wasn’t told about it.

  54. Vi
    +2

    My 15 year old daughter had no desire to watch the VMA’s, a fact for which I can be grateful. She mentioned Miley today to say that she is glad she didn’t see her ‘performance’, but that all her friends were FB’ing and tweeting about it. So, I think Miley’s production team did what they set out to do: get people talking about her. “All publicity is good publicity”, non?
    What I would like to know is why a married man, with a child, would allow a child-like 20 year old to grind on him like he’s a scratching post, with his wife in the audience?
    It seems to me that MTV and the various production teams from the performers were going for shock value, and they got it.

  55. Raimesela
    0

    I hope Miley doesn’t end up like Lindsay Lohan, all I’m saying. Looooooooooooooooove Kanye rhyme, especially not matching with nanny which their did on that pic where they went to the doctor.

  56.  mepe
    +3

    You know things are bad when Justin Timberlake is not only the shining star but the “legend”. What the heck has happened to music?!

  57. Julia
    +2

    This was the least sexy thing I have ever seen.

    •  HelenBackAgain
      0

      Gawker had a clip from that Teen Mom’s porn reel which is actually even less sexy than this. I wondered for some time after seeing it if I’d ever be interested in sex again, it was so off-putting.

      But this is a very, very close second.

  58. Jamie
    +2
  59. Marissa
    +2

    Gaga’s first outfit is very clearly a human Pictionary board. Wasn’t that obvy?

    And thank GOD Kanye came out in a strangely unattractive Mommy outfit. Perhaps he is human after all.

    Hmm.

    Nope, prolly not.

  60. CoCo TheUntameable Wine
    0

    Miley looked a damn fool and i would give my Queendom for those pix to fall off of the internet because thats all anyone has been posting since it happened.. Thicke wasnt happy said..they didnt rehearse it that way and he wasnt amused…and his first album was fantastic havent heard any of the others though..i exiled myself from pop, R&B and Rap til they get it together..if it comes on the radio i dont want to hear it.
    Bright side….I live for the Kanye and JLo skits!!

  61. Sharon
    0

    That tongue is just nasty… I mean, seriously nasty… like, get to the doctor and see if you are sick nasty.