Vanessa Fugbrams

When I heard Gossip Girl was going to Paris, I had this horrible fear that the whole SHOW would go. So, less like the brilliance of Brenda and Donna Go Abroad And Brenda Meets ‘Reek’ And Donna Almost Becomes A Model While Wearing a Giant-Sunflower-Print Dress, Like, I’M SO SURE; Meanwhile Dylan and Kelly Go All ‘Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover’ On The Beach And David Silver Sings About People Who Are Precious To Him And Andrea Gets A Bad Haircut And Brandon Dates A Bigot, and more of people illogically following Blair and Serena to Paris for contrived reasons, until they all end up standing at the Eiffel Tower bleating, “Rufus? What are YOU doing here? DAN? And VANESSA? Aren’t you too boring to be here?” And then it would be a parade of anyone who was ever on Gossip Girl, like Dorota and her new baby, and Carter Whatshisface, and Blair’s old minions, and her new ex-minions, and Jack Bass, and Rufus and Lily’s downstairs neighbor, and some extra who likes to sit on the Met steps who would be all, “Blair WALDORF! I haven’t seen you since you left for sixth-period English a year ago!”

Anyway, fortunately, my fears may have been unfounded. I have tried to make this as unspoilery as possible, but I don’t think it will ruin anyone’s day (except perhaps Jessica Szohr’s, as she is probably really bitter that her character is Too Dull For Europe) to say that this photo was not shot in Paris:
Hairy purse, denim vest-jacket — whatever. But are we, as a nation, really ready for clogs to come back? I just read an Us Weekly where a photo caption claimed Rachel Bilson is totally stoked for them this summer, and apparently V here is on board, but I am not so sure. To me, they are best left in Holland, and Melrose Place reruns. And V here is no Amanda Woodward. Like, get back to me when she makes her boss hang himself over his own desk, you know?
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Comments (43):

  1. Kate

    Honestly, the clogs are the only part of that outfit that doesn’t make me want to wretch.

  2. daisyj

    Okay, given this picture it’s kind of hard to defend, but I did just buy a pair of clog-type shoes that I think are really cute ( and it never actually occurred to me that I was participating in a revival. However, if I should come back here and say I’m also getting a cutoff denim vest and a purse with fifteen pounds of fringe, feel free to tranq me via the internet.

  3. Thelma

    I TOTES agree, above commenter…I kinda like the clogs!

  4. Kate

    My feet feel sweaty just looking at those. Clogs for the summer? Why God, why?

  5. KatyBug

    The dress has pockets. That dress – with all that’s going on in the pattern – also has pockets. Eeesh.

  6. KatyBug

    The dress has pockets. That dress – with all that’s going on in the pattern – also has pockets. Eeesh.

  7. Jules

    1994? Bah! I still have a pair from 1984!

  8. christine christine

    This reminds me of how we all dressed around when Pocahontas came out. Because we weren’t trying to be her, just evoke the feeling of the Colors Of The Wind.

  9. Anna

    I am actually super excited about the return of clogs, although I definitely plan to wait until it’s under 75 degrees before I wear them.

    I like the dress too, although I’d like it better without pockets. Hate the vest/purse/jewelry.

  10. Jill

    I’m also not offended by the clogs. I even like her dress in a way (minus the cargo pockets.) But the bag and the vest and still with the weave…

  11. yeahandalso

    those clogs are not fugly to me, the rest of the outfit is, but the clogs are fine.

    Also, your theory could still be true, they explained Vanessa was going to South America or something for an internship…so everybody else is free to show up in Paris.

  12. KB

    I’m not TOTALLY on board with clogs yet, but I actually think those ones are kind of cute with that outfit, which, while I wouldn’t wear it, is kind of okay on her.

    But, seriously, when is she going to get a decent haircut?

  13. Mongerel

    Clogs are comfortable, durable, and flattering. Love ‘em!

  14. RT

    They’re just so comfy! I’m wearing them, regardless, but it would be nice if they were “in” so that… you know… less embarrassing if not actually more flattering.

    OT: f’ing Roman Polanski, damnit. Frustrating.

  15. Bookworm
  16. twothirty

    I work at Us and I wrote that caption! Believe me, it PAINED me to do it :)

  17. debs

    Well, what can I say except that I am from the Netherlands.

    You know ‘Holland’ is just 2 of our provinces? (North and South Holland) … And that these are the 2 where our big cities are located… and that people are more prone to wear clogs in the 10 other provinces, because that is actually where some farmers live who still wear them.. but none of those provinces are named Holland at all….

    Anyone still reading? Probably not no… just saying.

  18. boo

    She looks like she is ready to stick her thumb out and hitch a ride to San Francisco.

  19. vandalfan

    I’m speaking from experience of the Original Clog Decade- the 1970′s. Those aren’t clogs. Her clog-like footwear has high heels. Her clog-like footwear has a peep-toe. Her clog-like footwear is marginally better than the heavy, honkin’ things I packed on my dogs while listening to John Denver, Dan Fogelberg, and James Taylor, and were worn with colorful, striped socks and concealed by the huge legs of San Francisco Riding Gear jeans. That purse, however, and the hairstyle ARE from the ’70′s, and they should have stayed there.

  20. faballa

    They’re not clogs, they’re mules.
    Clogs can never have an open toe.

  21. KateS

    The dress is cute – the rest is heinous and must die. Particularly the mules (which are not clogs because of the open toe).

  22. wakeupmaggie

    K. I’m old too, vandalfan, and I love the look. Hate the pockets on general principles-but the look is updated enough to be kind of cute rather than sad and trying too hard.

    I’m not sure I would call those clogs but I like them too.

  23. Nida

    I have been on an anti-clog crusade. Looks like I’m alone though. Sad days.

  24. jesse john

    I do what Miu Miu tells me to, therefore: clogs!

  25. Sajorina

    I hate her outfit and I hate her character on “Gossip Girl”! Both of them can go!

  26. Jennie-Suz

    Clogs only work on people with those adorably tiny feet. My feet require two yachts to cover all their acreage, so I am clearly ANTI-CLOG!

  27. Mallory

    I totally think of that Dylan/Kelly scence every time I hear “Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover.” Nice reference!

  28. Katharine

    I am totally on board with the clog. As someone who is built more like Jessica Simpson than Jessica Alba*, I am fully in favour of any and all footwear that is of the chunky persuasion. A massive shoe with a heel elongates my legs, makes them look comparatively slender, and balances out my butch shoulder line.

    Delicate little shoes, on the other hand, give me the dreaded ice-cream-cone silhouette – or, with spindly heels, make me look like a cheese wedge perched on a couple of cocktail picks.

    Bring on the clogs and the mules, I say.

    *only older, and without the benefit of even half-hearted workouts with celebrity trainers

  29. Blanche

    People. I have put up with your shoes that we cannot walk in for a number of years now. It is time to bring back the clog and other thick heels that we can walk for miles and miles in.

    Why? Are you going to make me spell this out for you?

    The little thing with the membership at the gym is not working out for America. We need to walk or bicycle, every day, to get to where we’re going. We are F-A-T obese, with big, flabby, pocked asses, and toot away all you like about how you’re just more “real” woman to love, but if we can and do walk and bicycle we will be much healthier. Adjusting the effing aesthetics to accommodate clogs is not a sacrifice, given the circumstances.

  30. Archaeologist

    Anything, ANYTHING at all on one’s feet including knitted booties, earth shoes – and clogs – have got to be better than hideous, terrible, leg-shortening, ankle-thickening gladiator sandals – with or without heels.

  31. Anna

    DEBS – Thank you! I’m from Amsterdam so I do actually live in Holland but I still can’t help but feel irritated when people get those two confused, which happens quite a lot. Our country is called The Netherlands people, NOT Holland.

  32. Blanche

    My husband has about 300 soccer t-shirts that say differently, Dutch ladies.

    Why stop at demanding English speakers change only one English word for another country? Why not demand that English speakers use each country’s own word for itself? (We can actually pronounce Nederland, you know. It’s not like we can only helplessly lisp into “th”s.) Why not? Because it’s not going to happen. Because the English words for Nederland include both Netherlands and Holland, but not, oddly enough, Nederland. But if this one particular idiosyncrasy of English among the 200 million idiosyncrasies of English really sticks in your craw, you can take it up with the English Language Czarina. She lives in the lollipop castle down the street from the Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office.

  33. Lila

    I tried to look at the shoes but I stopped somewhere around her weave, why is she dressed so dreadful?

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