I can only hope and pray that Jennifer Love Hewitt’s I’m A Recessionista Massage-Therapist Hooker will provide me ample photographs of her in ridiculous happy-ending outfits, so that we can talk some more about how bad-awesome that movie no doubt is. Seriously, it’s been a while since Lifetime ponied up a really earnest movie that made me laugh and laugh. Too long, in fact. In the meantime, though, all I have of J.Lo.Hew is this:
The summer dress is fine and all, but how do we feel about the matching shoes? Personally, I tend to leave the dyed-to-match concept where it belongs — at weddings, and even that is a bit of a head-scratcher — so it bugs me to see a neon dress with neon shoes that are trying SO HARD to be an exact color match. It’s a lot of hot pink, to the point where the entire effect switches from “bright and summery” to “please slather that poor sunburned girl in some aloe.” Also, the yellow toenail polish makes it look like she’s urinated on her toes. But technically we’re not talking about that right now; we’re supposed to stay on the topic of whether J.Lo.Hew botched the footwear portion of today’s program, and if I digress again, Intern George is going to point a hose full of poison at me (so, Diet Pepsi) and fire away until I learn to stay in line.
* Comments are now properly open. Why do they never open when I tell them to? WHY GOD WHY. The end.
** To address a debate in the comments: The dress is not a romper. I checked before I posted the picture. I would NEVER ignore a romper, this I swear to you.