The ESPYS Fug Carpet/Well Played: The Williams Sisters


well-played
VENUS WILLIAMS: Dude.

SERENA WILLIAMS: What?

VENUS: This isn’t cool, Serena.

SERENA: What are you talking about?

VENUS: You look AMAZING.

SERENA: Thanks! The last few weeks have been AWESOME. I’m really happy!

VENUS: That’s what I’m talking about. Right there. That.

SERENA: I’m not following.

VENUS: We had a DEAL.

SERENA: Which deal is that? We have many deals. My favorite is the one with Oreo, with that commercial where we’re having that press conference trash-talk-off with the Manning brothers and they’re all, “It’s on like Donkey Kong.” That turned out really well. It’s a really cute ad.

VENUS: No. A deal. Between you and me. A sisterly deal.

SERENA: You’re going to have to refresh my memory.

VENUS: YOU WON WIMBLEDON THIS YEAR.

SERENA: Wasn’t that AWESOME? Well. Maybe not totally for you. But then we won the doubles match! Again! And you won Wimbledon in 2007 AND 2008, so how steamed can you be, really, Venus? We’re awesome TOGETHER! I’m just…awesomer this year. That’s all.

VENUS: You’re being deliberately obtuse. Whoever wins Wimbledon has to wear the caftan. AND YOU LOOK GREAT AND I’M WEARING THE CAFTAN. I’m the LOSER in a CAFTAN and that WAS NOT THE DEAL. And you KNOW IT.

SERENA: But seriously, considering that it’s a caftan, you actually look really pretty cute. I mean it. I like that caftan.

VENUS: Then why aren’t you WEARING IT?

SERENA: Oh, look, there’s Andy Roddick! Gotta go! 

VENUS: I am going to kill her when we get home.

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