Fug File: Random Fug
Apparently, Nicole Trunfio here won an Australian supermodel competition:
[Photo: Splash News]
Here’s hoping nobody told her “Congratulations — now it’s time for the training bra to come off,” because that bra is all that’s keeping Lady Gaga from becoming jealous and upping the ante.
So, Jetta John-Hartley here is apparently a singer — dear young celebrities, PLEASE get a Wikipedia page for out-of-touch bloggers such as myself — and I believe she is also currently, or was once, in a British choir called Sense of Sound, who I found on YouTube performing with a boy’s school in a clip that is so AWESOME that if you aren’t moved by it, I worry about your VERY SOUL.
This does not entirely explain why she’s wearing this to the MOBO awards, though, apparently sans the rest of the group (has she gone solo? I’m sure SOMEONE in Fug Nation will know):
I don’t know that I can with good conscience sign off on this outfit — for many reasons, the least of which being that I am worried those shorts may do her actual anatomical harm, and she seems like she might be awesome enough that we want her in one piece — but I have to admit that nothing cracks me up like a girl on the red carpet holding her own jacket, and wallet, and phone, like she’s trying to open her apartment door with her hands full instead of posing for the press. Someone get this girl an assistant, please!
I feel compelled not to use this person’s name, just because SURELY she woke up this morning and thought, “What the HELL DID I DO LAST NIGHT?”
The caption did say she is wearing something,** by the designer whose store opening this was, so I feel safe in asserting two things: She has used it to scrub her tile grout already today, and Bai Ling has already called to ask if she can dry-clean it and wear it to Barnes & Noble. Not necessarily in that order.
** This comma, placed in error, suddenly became hilarious to me — like, as if the caption felt compelled to defend that she is indeed clothed. Heh.
Well, if Vivid Video ever wants to throw a Renaissance Faire, I’ve a pretty shrewd idea who’ll staff the tarot booth.