Fug File: Pussycat Dolls

Kimberly Fugyatt


Remember when the Pussycat Dolls were a thing? Kimberly Wyatt surely hopes you do, as she’s releasing a solo album this year called — wait for it — “Derriere,” which is almost as delicious as that time Bai Ling was shopping a book called Nipples.

And while this dress isn’t so much about the derriere, it DOES hope you will spend considerable time dissecting it front half. It LOOKS like you can ssee panties and a bra, but then, it ALSO looks like you can see BLUE panties, when in fact those are sequins. It’s the illusion of the illusion of transparency. That’s going deep, people. That’s two layers of deception. It’s a pity both of those layers look like they cost ninety-nine cents and/or came out of a party store confetti cannon.

[Photo: WENN]

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Fugody Thornton


Remember when the Pussycat Dolls were a thing? Seems so far away, doesn’t it? And that’s as good a reason as any why Melody Thornton shouldn’t have worn this:

Because now we can’t tell if she’s just wearing really awful harem pants, or she’s actually seeking employment IN a harem. Hey, times are tough. I just wish she’d tried Hammer pants first. He’s probably a better boss — both too legit to quit AND prone to laying out quite clearly what you can and can’t touch.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]

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Fuglycat Dolls


So, I guess Nicole Scherzinger is still happening.

Nicole Scherzinger

She looks a bit like a very fancy WWII French spy, or something — but a really BAD one, who goes by the name Esse Pionage, blows all her stealth moves with her heels, LOOKS exactly like a spy, and raises her hand whenever anyone says, “Is there a spy in the house?”

But I prefer Ms. Pionage to this lady:

Loosen Up Your Tassels Baby

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Teen Choice Awards Fug Carpet: Kimberly Wyatt


I think Kimberly Wyatt here, bless her, may have been one of about three people at the Teen Choice Awards NOT wearing some kind of sparkly short something:
Instead, she is dressed as Afugdite, the Greek goddess of turning expensive throw-pillows into jumpsuits.
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Kimberly Fugytt


Kimberly Wyatt is SO my favorite Pussycat Doll. She’s even dressed as the literal interpretation of such:

I mean, yes, some kind of crazy, tore-up slutty doll, topped with the fur of the most bedraggled pussycat EVER — but I appreciate the literalism. Also, the craziness.

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Fugberly Wyafug


I guess Kimberly Wyatt here is officially an ex-Pussycat Doll, per the caption that came with this photo. And now Google tells me the group broke up at the end of last year. Whatever shall I do. Wherever shall I go.

I wonder who came out the winner here. Solo-for-the-second-time-now artist Nicole Scherzinger has a record deal, true, but she’s also forced to trot around a parquet floor wearing heinous costumes while pretending she’s having fun frolicking to a karaoke-parlor-quality cover of, say, Lady Gaga. So even though Kim here is stuck in a shorn leather jacket and a romper made out of wallpaper and ribbon, there is at least no illusion netting in sight. AND she appears to have made a purse out of all Nicole’s old hair pieces, which feels like a very advanced way of flipping the bird. Maybe I’ll call it a tie.
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