Fug File: purple

Oscars Well Played: Cate Blanchett

A caveat: this is admittedly crazy.  But I think it’s also very HER. And on a night when everyone else looked, honestly, kinda dull, it was nice to get a little crazy up in this bitch. Let’s take a closer look.


Well Played, Michelle Williams

I hope, whatever she wears on Sunday, the color is at least this pretty:

In fact, this whole dress is cute — the cleavage triangle is perhaps a little questionable, but who amongst us hasn’t done something questionable with our cleavage? Do I wish I had a better shot of her feet? Yes. Do I suspect that whatever she’s done on her feet, it’s unlikely it could be SO HORRIBLE as to un-cute-ify this dress? Yes. Will I totally eat my words if it turns out she’s wearing cloven-foot gladiator sandal Uggs? With mustard.


Fug-Age Dream

Katy Perry’s new fragrance — which she’s holding here, see? I CAN’T BLAME YOU IF YOU ARE DISTRACTED BY SOMETHING ELSE IN THE PICTURE — is called PURR.

And her exposed wrist tattoo is called, “Jesus.”

The phrases “cat-themed perfume,” “Jesus tattoo” and “Plexiglass-trapped boobs partially obstructed by grape-flavored mouse ears” are like three players in the world’s most advanced — and hilarious — game of Mad Libs. God knows, I wish that was the excuse I had for bringing them to your attention today.

[Photo: Splash News]


(FUG) Days of Summer

It’s a bad sign when your outfit prompts me to wonder if you are one of the many many many MANY MANY Hollywood celebrities who’ve got a bun in the oven/are all sprogged up/ have found themselves up the duff/who’re cooking a human hot pocket in their lady microwave/whatever your pregnancy euphemism of choice may be:

There’s been no announcement of an impending Deschanellette, but of course that doesn’t MEAN anything and if there IS a baby percolating in her slow cooker, then I will of course get to crow about it for WEEKS. And if there isn’t, I wonder why Zooey — who is so pretty — would wear this. Unless it’s just because she’s suddenly become a mega-fan of the grape in the Fruit of the Loom ads and this is like a high-style homage. I get it. The grape is really good in those ads.

For kicks, let’s look at her shoes:


Fug or Fab: Blake Lively

The good: I do love an unexpected pop of turquoise.

The bad: Is this a twinge too small? I mean, not AGGRESSIVELY too small. I just can’t help but think that this frock would look a bit better on Blake — who, let’s get real, has a great figure and looks good regardless as far as that goes — if it had a few extra inches of wiggle room. Like one inch, even.

There’s proof!


Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Fug’hoole

You guys know how much I want to believe Helen Mirren can do no wrong, but… I think maybe she has done wrong. The shrug, the weird stitching, the shrug, the fact that I still think I can see some nipple underneath all that, the fishtail, the shrug, the hair, the lipstick, the SHRUG… It’s not that she isn’t still a silver fox; more that I think she’s not maximizing her silver foxyness in this outfit. I don’t want her to look like the Grande Dame of a brothel or anything, but I REALLY don’t want her to look like the Grande Dame of a picked-over department store sale rack.

Nor the Grande Dame of the Goodwill Store (last picture). You know, Helen, Red was just a job, not a suggestion.