Fug File: people we don't see out much

Well Played, Hoda Kotb


HODA KOTB: I look FABULOUS.

KATHIE LEE GIFFORD: You are so CUTE that you’re all out there, TRYING to CATCH A MAN IN YOUR SHORT SKIRT! OH YOU ARE ADORABLE WITH YOUR OPTIMISM. I really ADMIRE YOU.

HODA:…Kathie Lee, we’ve talked about this. I’m tired of the way you constantly rib me for being single.

KATHIE LEE: That’s the price you pay when you CAN’T HOLD A MAN! AM I RIGHT EVERYONE? Where’s the bar here, do you think?

HODA: First of all, I have a very rich and varied dating life.

KATHIE LEE: We all know what THAT MEANS, DON’T WE EVERYONE? SLUTTY!

HODA: Kathie. It’s just us. We’re not on TV right now. We can talk TO EACH OTHER. You don’t need to direct these comments to the ether. Talk to ME. I’m trying to communicate with you.

KATHIE LEE: You know what else men hate? COMMUNICATING. YUK YUK YUK No, where is the bar, Hoda?

HODA: Kathie Lee, we had a deal. You stop making comments about how I’m going to die alone and —

KATHIE LEE: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH DYING ALONE MIGHT BE BETTER THAN DYING WITH FRANK AM I RIGHT EVERYONE? Hey, guess what? I think it’s time for a letter from our Facebook fans!

HODA: I have a letter for you.

KATHIE LEE: HIT ME.

HODA: Don’t tempt me.

KATHIE LEE: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH OH HODA AT LEAST YOU HAVE YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR TO KEEP YOU WARM AT NIGHT.

HODA: And I look amazing in this dress. I look FREAKING FABULOUS. AND YOU CAN’T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME.

KATHIE LEE: That reminds me, last night I was talking to FRANK, and he said –

HODA: You know what? I’m not on the clock right now. I’M going to to find the bar. And guess what? I’M NOT GOING TO BRING YOU BACK ANY WINE.

KATHIE LEE: You’ll pay for that KODA HOTB.

HODA: I look forward to it, Kathie Lee. I LOOK FORWARD TO IT.

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Fug or Fab: Shannen Doherty


Well, well, well, who do we have here?

Brenda Walsh, in the flesh, and showing more of it than you’d think from just the rather modest front view. Behold the back:
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Unfug It Up: Charlotte Church


Hey! Remember Charlotte Church? She’s got a new album coming out this month — or, as the kids call it, “dropping” — and thus she’s once more out and about:

I just wish she would have run this outfit past someone before she left the house wearing it — surely Charlotte must have Posh’s number on speed dial, somewhere, and you KNOW Vicky would lend a hand.  If she’d called me, I would have advised her to start over entirely — but let’s pretend we’ve all got to work with what we’ve got standing in front of us here. Imagine you ran into Miss Church here in the parking lot of the event and she begged you to make her presentable before you both went inside. What would you do? Consider this your Project Runway challenge, and MAKE IT WORK in the comments:

 
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Fuglys Knight


Hi, Gladys.

You look so sassy here. Like, “HELLO, world, prepare to marinate in my glory.”
And yet here…

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Beverly Fug, 90210


Kathleen Robertson! You may remember her from her role as Clare on Beverly Hills 90210, on which she was Steve’s beleaguered girlfriend, who Made Him a Better Man before bailing to go to Paris FOREVER. Surely you recall this heart-wrenching moment in Steve’s life. I once had a week about ten years ago in which I ran into her both at Denny’s — at 3 a.m., because this is when I was young — and then the next day at Bloomingdale’s. So what I’m saying is, I’m pretty sure Kathleen Robertson was stalking me once. And I thought I was free from her, but HERE SHE IS:

[Photo: WENN.com]

Judging from the tights, I suspect she may also be moonlighting as a nurse. In the 1950s.

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The X-Fugs


I feel underqualified to write this post. Jessica recapped The X-Files for years and I only casually watched, so she would have countless obscure Dana Scully references to make and all I can remember is that there was cancer and maybe a baby, and she had red hair, and for a season or so said the line, “This cancer is invading my body,” about a hundred times. None of which really applies to Gillian Anderson’s problems here (I hope):

Unless she stayed up all night watching an X-Files marathon, and it turned her into such a paranoid hermit that she couldn’t shop for this premiere, so instead she sloppily pinned up a bedsheet that she hemmed with her teeth. As if we wouldn’t notice, Gillian. The truth IS out there, you know.
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