Fug File: leather

Fugcky Hilton


It’s a bad sign for Nicky Hilton that I saw this photo from afar and thought, “Oh, Lord, here we go, another Real Housewife of Tackyville.”

[Photo: Splash News]

It is here that I was going to write, “Then again, maybe Nicky Hilton would consider that a positive, since presumably none of the Real Housewives have to go to Thanksgiving with Paris.” But then Jessica informed me that, in fact, two of the Beverly Hills Real Housewives are Nicky’s aunts, meaning they probably DO have to go to Thanksgiving with Paris, or at least call her on the day and ask how she’s enjoying her acai berry smoothie with turkey juice or whatever. And thus there are no winners here. Sigh. I just don’t think our country can take this much tragedy. 
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Fugbrey O’Day


It’s like Aubrey O’Day woke from a coma this morning with a gasp and thought, “holy crap. It’s nearly Thanksgiving. If I don’t get out there, I am going to be TOTALLY out of the running for Fug Madness this year!”

Welcome back, Aub. Don’t worry. A fur skirt makes up a LOT of ground.

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Who Fugged It More (Or Less)? Madonna vs Blake Lively vs Sophie Monk


All I know is that my FIRST reaction to this is, “DUDE. Madonna. When you’re wearing something to an event that BLAKE LIVELY already wore, in JANUARY no less — nearly an entire decade ago, it feels like — and that SOPHIE MONK OF ALL PEOPLE  was also already photographed in, albeit in August, then we ALL know you are OFF YOUR GAME.” Behold:

I mean, sure — the rest of us don’t worry about whether or not someone’s already worn our perforated bootaloons and we also repeat outfits all the time. But none of us are Madonna (except you, Madonna — hi!), who built her entire career on the concept of looking new and interesting. But the main question, truly, is who pulled off her perforated bootaloons with the most verve?

Should you need a refresher, behold Ms Blake “I just read that she might be taking up with DiCaprio, and that’s going to get INTERESTING” Lively:

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A Beautiful Fug


I feel like this is one of those outfits that you can only really get away with if the rest of you is SO GOOOOD-LOOKING that your hotness distracts from the fact that, for example, your dress has what appears to be an unfastened, built-in chastity belt:

Like, just looking at this is making me exhausted. It’s Friday, you know? I just can’t even DEAL. I mean, I get it, Connelly. You’re edgy. You’re complex. And I don’t understand your aesthetic, seeing as at this event it seems to involve light bondage gear, linoleum, and a tablecloth — three tastes that REALLY only taste great in VERY SPECIFIC INSTANCES. So I’m just going to concentrate on your pretty face and pretend that none of this ever happened.

That way, I also won’t have to wonder why you looked like this ten minutes later:
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Fug or Fab: Estelle


I’ll put this one up to a vote, because I’m feeling charitable, and maybe this is one of those cases where I can’t see the forest for the trees.

The forest being, Estelle’s overall attempt at funky-cool style; and the trees are the gold jacket that’s either bad-ass or C-3PO (or possibly, somehow, both), and the high-waisted leather capri pants that are so close to Hammer that something just leapt out of my toolbox to make room for them.

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Le Petits Fugchoirs


Marion Cotillard’s beautiful big eyes are my favorite feature of hers. So I’m bummed that they’re lost in everything else that’s going on here:

I’m not merely referring to the giant leather dust-ruffle she is using as underwire, but also to the shaggy banged ‘do and bright lipstick. Even the peekaboo shoes are conspiring to draw attention away from her pretty, pretty face. Hell, this whole outfit is something you would ask a lady to wear if you suspected she were secretly Medusa. No fear of anyone turning to stone on this day, that’s for sure, which is good because that fate is really not convenient for me right now.
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Going the Fugstance


I’m kind of enjoying Drew Barrymore’s Going the Distance World Tour:

[Photo: Splash News]

If the outfit featured this morning was Meryl Streep in Out of Africa meets Stevie Nicks, this one is more like Michael Jackson: The Thriller Years meets Fraulein Maria before she leaves the Abbey. I can’t wait to see what bizarre new concoction tomorrow will bring: Britney Spears meets Margaret Thatcher? Brenda Walsh as Laverne the Peach Pit Waitress meets Eleanor of Aquitaine? Drew Barrymore in Poison Ivy meets Drew Barrymore in Grey Gardens? Honey, bring it on!

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