Fug File: Hart of Dixie

Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 17


I must say, I thought this episode was VERY cute. In short: Zoe visits a psychic who tells her that she’s been cursed for breaking up George and Lemon (“Lemorge,” as Zoe puts it, which is NOT a name that makes one likely to ‘ship a pair) and who tells her that the only way she can get uncursed is by getting them back together. This is a Class A Zoe Hart Shenanigan of the Week, and it’s excellent. It also goes about as badly as you can imagine, as Lemorge do NOT have feelings for each other, beyond each really wanting to repeat their recent roll in the hay. In other news, AB’s Mystery Knight has been revealed, and it’s Barry Watson, and of course he is somehow related to the Mayor of Fillmore because when this show doesn’t know what to do for conflict it has someone date someone from Fillmore (albeit generally with amusing results, so I will allow it. Also, I like Barry Watson). And Vivian’s ex-husband hates Wade for a variety of reasons and Vivian decides to make this WADE’S problem rather than dealing with her own ex-husband herself because, as Jill pointed out so wisely in the comments a couple of weeks ago, Vivian leaves all the heavy lifting in their relationship to Wade. Vivian also wears something highly inappropriate, but Lemon looks AWESOME. So we have that going for us.

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Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 16


Zoe Hart, sometimes you are an idiot. Sure, for reasons that cannot be contravened without making this a wholly other show, but still. STILL.

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Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie Recap: Season 3 Episode 15


In which we find out how Hart of Dixie plans to jettison Joelle.

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Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3 episode 14


All hail the return of Lemon! This episode had a lot of fun stuff in it, namely, a lot of Don Todd and his Monster Golf Safari, and a VERY ELABORATE PARTY thrown together at the last minute, which was extreme even by BlueBell standards. Essentially, though, not that much happened: Lemon is back, and she’s got two dudes fighting over her (her grandmother’s hot chauffeur and the bedimpled Carter Covington); Zoe’s PR artiste mother acts a fool and Zoe allows it because she wants her mother’s affection, because Zoe truly acts like the misunderstood heroine of a YA novel half the time, which is only cute when you are in fact 16; Magnolia is not dead, but she does have a new haircut. Sadly, my theory that Zoe’s Mom and Brick were going to fall in love and get married, making Lemon and Zoe step-sisters, sadly does not appear as though it will come to pass. Pour some out, and then onto the flapper dresses. Which were spectacular, especially since everyone had 12 hours to source them in a tiny town in Alabama, albeit a tiny town in Alabama well known for throwing constant fancy dress events. Also: Meatball and a continuity error that I cannot believe I noticed.

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Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 13


This episode featured some stellar work from Scott Porter, the glorious return of Lavon’s Kitchen Pastry, and a moment where I thought, “well, this show has FINALLY figured out what to do with Tom Long.” Plus, a variety of good outfits and two really bad man-tunics. The fate of this show is up in the air — The CW has renewed Supernatural (which is going to run until the sun explodes), The Vampire Diaries, The Originals, Arrow, and Reign, but everything else is still a big old question mark. I hope they do renew it, both because I think it’s great, and because I am slightly concerned that if they don’t, we’re going to end the whole thing on a cliffhanger. (If we do, I hope it’s Models, Inc style, where someone has been thrown off a balcony and someone else is trapped in a whorehouse in Mexico.)

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Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie, episode 3-12 recap


For an episode that felt full of some fluffy stuff — BlueBell’s in the middle of a Health Month, and Zoe uses it to make a bet with Brick to get back her partnership at the practice, which she then loses because Cricket moves up Cake Fest (this is the most Hart of Dixie sentence ever) because she’s bankrupted the Belles, and Cake Fest is their big money maker; Joel shadows Wade so that he can better understand the protagonist in The Cicadas Lament 2: Cicadier — some actual stuff did happen. I’m just going to say it: TOM AND WANDA ARE NOT GETTING AN ALPACA FARM. I know. I’m upset too.

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