Fug File: Fictional English Miniseries

Fugs and Fabs the Dudes: The Tommy Hilfiger/Esquire Event


Because I know you want to look at pictures of hot British dudes in suits.  With bonus Cumberbatch.

[Photos: Getty]

react:

Fugs and Fabs: The British Fashion Awards


In which Stella McCartney wears something so terrible you…well, you might not be that surprised anymore. But trust me: it’s BAD. Other people look surprisingly decent. At least one person was kinda naked. So, you know: THE USUAL.

[Photos: WENN]

react:

Well Played, Gillian Anderson


And with one well-employed caftan-esque ensemble, Gillian Anderson joins the cast of thousands in my unwritten, epic English Country House Weekend Party Murder/Romance/Time-Travel mini-series:

Obviously, she plays a HIGHLY eccentric American with a wandering accent and a tendency to go on at length about aliens, a habit of informing people over and over and over again that she is a medical doctor (she is particularly experienced at autopsies!), a nasty way of NEVER believing anyone with a less than perfectly rational story, and a hang-up for some handsome but paranoid weirdo she’s left behind in the States. She is actually a somewhat irksome houseguest, but at least her dress is FANTASTIC.

react:

Fug or Fab: Hayley Atwell


You guys know I love her. I mean, she is one of the stars of my Fictional English Countryside Weekend Party Murder/Romance/Time-Travel/Nazi Hunting/Comedy/Drama Miniseries, and I don’t funnel just ANY British celebrity into that, my most beloved but currently non-existent intellectual property. Dame Maggie Smith isn’t even in it! (That’s a lie. I just cast her as Matt Lewis’s meddling grandmother, who won’t release his trust fund until he marries someone she deems appropriate. Of course, eventually she will be won over by someone totally unsuitable, who nonetheless has refreshing moxie. Don’t worry. Although I might kill that Moxie-Having Unsuitable off in Part II: The War Comes and Ruins EVERYTHING.) But do I love this?

I kinda hate the shoes, but I kinda love the dress. I can’t help it. That color is just aces.

What do you think, gorgeous?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
react:

MTV Movie Awards Well Played for Something Carpet: Brie Larson


I actually think this is cute, although I’m not sure if it’s exactly proportioned perfectly for her:

Let’s be frank: I mostly want to lengthen the skirt and cast her in my oft-discussed, never written 1930s English Houseparty Weekend Miniseries Starring Neville Longbottom as the sassy younger sister of the Haley Atwell character, who fancies herself a great detective (very Flavia de Luce) and who — because she is poorly supervised as ALL children in English Houseparty Books/Miniserieses are — ends up at the bottom of a well or stuck on a folly in the middle of a lake in a storm or breaks her ankle on a moor or something and of course needs to get rescued by Neville Longbottom, because he has Secret Bravery and Great Sensitivity (that of course the War will beat out of him in the sequel; it will be quite moving).  And this dress will be FABULOUSLY ruined by the inclement weather. And everyone on the internet will say both “wow, Brie Larson was kind of too old for that part,” but ALSO “did you ever think, watching 21 Jump Street, that Brie Larson could do such a great English accent?” It’s going to be great. Hire your dialect coach and start using moisturizer now, honey!

react:

Fugs and Fabs: Hayley Atwell


My fondness for Hayley Atwell is well documented — after all, I wouldn’t let JUST ANYONE star in my fictional mini-series about extremely good-looking English people having Romantical Problems/Possibly Time-Traveling during Olden Times. But that doesn’t mean I can’t pull her aside from time to time and say, “Darling, you’re GORGEOUS! No, no — you know it’s true! But what on earth are you wearing? It’s terribly terribly dreadful, pet. Just simply beyond. You look like you’re wearing full-body Spanx without whatever was supposed to go on top of the Spanx, don’t you see? Oh, darling, honestly, don’t cry. Come into the drawing room and I’ll fix you a perfectly lovely gin and tonic. We’ll manage somehow. Maybe we can toss one of the tapestries over you! Nothing shall ruin this country house weekend! Not even MURDER!”

[Photos: WENN]

react: