WTF: Kris Jenner in Chanel at Couture Week

To those of you who will say, “Please stop featuring these people,” my response of choice for TODAY is: I cannot deprive Fug Nation of the chance to laugh at the unintended amusements of this person together. Because COME ON.

kris jenner see-through pants Chanel

I mean, congratulations on having those legs as a mom of six, but YOU ARE OFF YOUR TREE, YOU ABSURD PERSON. She looks like a caricature of Kim rolled in a crunchy Lagerfeldian coating and drizzled in delusion. It’s so unintentionally hilarious. What would one call the cartoon that is Kris, I wonder? I had a truly offensive Family Circle joke percolating that I won’t use, so right now I’m torn betweeen Barfield, For Jenner or For Worse, Goonsbury, or Obnoxtrot.

[Photo: Splash]


American Music Awards WTF ENOUGH ALREADY Tragical Carpet of Desperation: Bleona Qereti

Another music awards show, another outfit chiefly composed of mesh and an Ab Roller. Tell me this: Have you ever even heard of “singer” Bleona Qereti?

Bleona Qereti


and that is the Mildly Safe For Work version; this is not


What The Fug: Alessandra Ambrosio at amfAR Inspiration LA Gala

Between this and the annual Cannes event, what IS it about amfAR that makes people think, “Yes! FINALLY, a place where I can really air out my crevices”?

Alessandra Ambrosio

Of course, from the front, it’s mostly a Codpiece Gone Wild. I feel like I’m looking at an anaconda having lunch, but from above.

The back will not surprise you, but it may alarm:

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VMAs Fug Carpet: Amber Rose

It’s already been pointed out that Amber Rose appears to have been channeling Rose McGowan at the 1998 VMA.

Amber Rose In Strings at VMAs 2014

Seriously, “Amber Rose McGowan” feels like an answer on Wheel of Fortune that neither Pat Sajak nor Vanna White would fully understand. To be fair to Amber, McGowan’s was see-through in front — her thong was leopard, her nipples were not (does that make Wiz Khalifa the Marilyn Manson in this scenario?)(wow, suddenly I want to see that quadrangle out to dinner somewhere; I think Marilyn would be miserable). But RMG being more naked does not make Amber’s any less absurd. It’s like Princess Leia came out of Jabba’s lair and decided to empower herself through fashion.

It’s also not the first time Amber has worn strings (Kanye West may have singlehandedly guided her to her Fug Madness crown). I don’t even know if it’s the worst time Amber has worn strings. You BET I am going to make you vote on which is worse, the spandex jail or the cage of sparkle. But before I do that, I want you to contemplate two things: 1) Amber’s hubby Wiz wore a shirt with suicide hotline information on it, which is a nice idea and very important, and TOTALLY got overshadowed by his wife’s metal floss, so maybe he needs to learn to pick his moments better; 2) is it an ACTUAL crime against the universe if she and Kim Kardashian did not run into each other in the bathroom line? I think it is.

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[Photo: AKM-GSI]


What The Fug: Chrissy Teigen in I Can’t Even

Granny panties, a see-through skirt, and a poorly draped top that puts the “ow” in luau?

Chrissy Teigen (1)

Looks like someone has a raging case of the Kimyes. Beyonce was right to skip the wedding, they clearly don’t have a vaccine for this yet.

anyone want to see the back?


What the Fug: Maitland Ward

I know Maitland Ward from being on The Bold and The Beautiful a whopping 20 years ago, but she also apparently starred in Boy Meets World – which I never watched, because I chose my Savage, and it was Fred.  Many of you, however, will only know her as The High Priestess of Underboob And Chief Executive Crotchicer of No:

I feel like this is how another Exorcist sequel will start.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]