Fug File: CFDA

CFDA Fug or Fab: Michelle Monaghan in Monique Lhuillier


So, I think this is what Ashley Judd HOPED she was doing, but wasn’t:

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From what I can tell, the sides of this, after that band around her thighs, ARE in fact lined, so we’re not getting A Surplus of Side-Butt.  And while God knows I am so weary of The Sheers, I do think this is artfully done. It feels like the prettiest party dress at a really good Gatsby party (where, ideally, no one dies at the end and everyone gets to take home a gift bag loaded with men’s shirts). And, ergo, I have totally talked myself into liking this. What do you think?

[Photo: Getty]

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CFDA Fugs and Fabs: The Models


Other than Margulies and a few people here and there, the CFDAs were a shockingly pizza-free event. I was SURE it would be all Little Caesars up in here.

[Photos: Getty]

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CFDAs Well Played, Emmy Rossum in Dion Lee


Let’s start with something very important. Good shoes:

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The front SEEMS slightly boring, perhaps, but then! THEN! The heel. Delightful and divine. (They are, for your shoe-ogling needs, by Paul Andrew, who was her date, and she’s got an even better shot of them on her Instagram.)

But about the rest of it:

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CFDAs Fug or Funky: Jemima Kirke in Rosie Assoulin


I think Rosie Assoulin is, generally, just not my cup of java. Plenty of people really like and respond to her designs, but I almost never seem to, and this might be another to add to that list:

jemima kirke CFDA Awards 2015

I can understand the appeal: It’s unusual, it’s trying something, it’s got shape, and for the love of nethers, it’s not trying to show us all of Jemima’s girls. And even though it’s more body-con than the pagan-ritual caftans she often wears, there’s still something about its spirit that feels VERY apt on La Kirke. There are a lot of reasons to suggest this colors me interested, and yet I still can’t help wondering if she wore that top because they told her they’d be serving lobster.

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[Photo: Getty]

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CFDA Meh Carpet: Katie Holmes in Ralph Lauren


I do love olive green, and naps, and this is basically both of those things together:

katie holmes in ralph lauren

It’s… FINE, and she’s dressed, and she brushed her hair, but is this even remotely passing for the best or dreamiest or weirdest (or even riskiest) in fashion on a night meant to honor that? No. My money is on Katie Holmes glancing enviously across the room at Diane Kruger and thinking, “Why? WHY is that never me?” (Which would be awkward, as Diane is with Katie’s off-screen ex and on-screen love, Pacey, but it would be fair to have regrets about that TOO.) Imagine if Katie, just once, showed up in something like that red Prabal, styled with a Kruger-like updo. Our breath would leave our bodies and we’d be like, “FINALLY. IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING.” Instead… still waiting. You can do it, Katie. SURPRISE US. THERE’S STILL TIME.

[Photo: Getty]

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CFDAs Fug Carpet: Chrissy Teigen in Solace London


So, we’ve discussed this before, but apparently it bears repeating: Given that Chrissy Teigen is Having A Moment – she’s on Spike’s surprise hit Lip Sync Battle, she co-hosted the Billboard Music Awards, she swept through awards season on the arm of big winner John Legend, and she’s generally basically everywhere — it seems weird to me that she’s frequently in stuff that is past its expiration date.

chrissy teigen CFDA awards 2015

Granted, the same or similar outfits crop up on different celebs all the time, but I keep thinking Chrissy ought to be commanding stuff we haven’t seen before — much less ages before. At the Billboards she wore three Balmains and an Anthony Vaccarello that were stale, and we saw this exact dress in orange on Caitriona Balfe back at the SAG Awards in January (which even then felt like an eye roll, because Wilting Bodice had been done to my personal exhaustion and befuddlement during the year prior). Chrissy’s escort on the night was Stuart Weitzman, which explains the shoes, and it’s true that we give her a hard time for resting on super naked stuff; at least this is a departure from THAT. But it’s not particularly pretty nor transportive nor even flattering, and so here’s hoping a funkier designer with more original flair ponies up some stuff for her in the coming year.

Oh, and per Instagram, the slit on this thing tore up another five inches during the night. EVEN THE DRESS decided it was time quit itself.

[Photo: Getty]

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CFDAs Unfug It Up: Victoria Beckham


The thing is, she actually looks fine. Maybe even great.

victoria beckham CFDA Awards 2015

And I think it’s great that Victoria Beckham has carved a space for herself as a savvy and gifted businesswoman, and I will always remember what a great impression I got of her when she did those tiny salon-style fashion shows and narrated the entire thing. But I’m jonesing for a makeover. A poshover. A becksover. Let’s bob the hair again, maybe — angular and cool — or change up the eye makeup so it’s not always exactly the same heavy eye with brown shadows and dark liner and nude lips. Let’s throw in some color. Let’s, for kicks, stand with the other side of the face exposed to the lenses. (Even in her 73 Questions video for Vogue ages ago, she tried to be filmed only from this angle whenever possible.) In short, while this is perfectly fine for a night at which she is representing herself as a businesswoman first and other things second and Posh Spice distantly last, I’m ready for her to shake it up aesthetically. What would you do with her? Hint: Imagine that you are Tyra Banks and she is a Top Model contestant, and then do the opposite.

[Photo: Getty]

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