Fug File: Cannes

Fugs and Fabs: Models at the Cannes amfAR Gala


Are you ready to take a trip to Leg City? It’s ON. To the extreme.

[Photos: WENN and Bauer Griffin]

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Cannes Fugs and Fabs: The “All Is Lost” Premiere


In which we begin with Jessica Chastain, and end with a little game I like to call, “Wait, Is That Petra Nemcova? … It is. Maybe?”

[Photos: Getty]

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Cannes (Mostly) Well Played: Zhang Ziyi


We saw her at the Opening Gala in something questionable at best. Thank God she got it — and her cropped wig (?) — out of the way early, not least because when you look your worst at the beginning of an event, NO ONE will remember by the end! Also, Wikipedia just taught me that she was recently in a Chinese adaptation of Dangerous Liaisons set in 1930s Shanghai and I am about 100% sure I need to see that now. (She’s in the Michelle Pfeiffer/Reese Witherspoon role, depending on your favorite Dangerous Liaisons adaptation .)

[Photos: Getty]

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Cannes Fug Carpet: Eva Longoria


In which the once-and-future Widow Longoria tries to shed that randomly bestowed nickname that accidentally stuck… and then sheds other things also.

[Photos: Getty]

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Cannes Bai Ling: Bai Ling


We saw her at the Cannes Opening Ceremony, and that was not just a tease. SHE IS BACK. And according to IMDb, she’s got THIRTEEN MOVIES in various stages of completion. Sure, some of them just have “???” listed as their release date, but still. One of them stars Andrew McCarthy! That’s a real thing! Bring on the multiple premieres for your assorted, possibly-straight-to-DVD-but-whatever films, Bai Ling. Never leave me again!

[Photos: Getty]

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Cannes Fugs and Fabs: Jessica Biel


I was going to make a snide joke about how I wonder if Biel will ever work again — I keep forgetting she was in Hitchcock – and then IMDb reminded me that there is a rumor that the David O. Russell movie she made with Jake Gyllenhaal in 2008 (which was apparently a disaster on several fronts, from financing to problems with SAG to apparently huge chunks of it being unfilmed) is finally coming out this year. Can you imagine knowing that what should have been a total marquee film for your career has been moldering for almost five years? And watching Jennifer Lawrence win an Oscar for her David O. Russell movie during that time? Biel can be annoying — remember that time she moaned to Allure about how it’s been super, super hard for her to be SO BEAUTIFUL, career-wise? — but that has got to have really stuck in her craw. Insert your own “craw” joke when you see her bird outfit.

[Photo: Getty, Splash, Fame/Flynet]

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