Fug File: Met Ball

Met Gala Well Played: Bee Shaffer in Alexander McQueen

I want Bee Shaffer to be awesome. Because here’s the thing: North West may need her. Like North, Bee has a mother — Anna Wintour — who is notorious and also powerful. And while Bee is ostensibly close with her mother, she doesn’t appear to be trying to coast on her coattails, or at least courting any fame beyond what you naturally get from being in New York social circles. North West may need a primer on how to avoid the fray. #SaveNorth.


Bee Shaffer in Alexander McQueen

This is just stunning. Every year Bee trots out something astonishing at the Met — it can’t hurt that the designers do not want to upset La Grande Dame by making a mug out of her child – and she wears it with quiet dignity and elegance, while many of the A-list invitees invitees glide around her like gluttons at the attention buffet. Which is totally their right; it’s what red carpet events are for, and Lord knows I don’t begrudge them the spotlight, because it brings out SO many outfits worth discussing. I just enjoy that amid all the pomp and circumstance from people who think they’re the center of attention, Bee Shaffer quietly steals the show.

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Met Gala Fine or Fab: Jessica Chastain in Prada

The color of this dress is deep and magnificent.

Jessica Chastain

The cut is also extremely flattering, save for the usual razor-sharp nipple darts that pock the chests of nearly every Prada gown. Here, the lace bib offsets it a bit, but it’s also flirting with Schoolmarm. The base is more Old West Brothel Madam, and the wisps on the skirt are… quite possibly remnants of the Lost smoke monster. There’s a randomness to all that which feels like four people trying to have a conversation without fully speaking each other’s languages. She’s carrying it as best she can, but don’t you wish we could wipe the slate clean and start over with the embellishments? Or even give that blue fabric a pattern? It’s like Quantico in dress form: solid start, but limping confused and aimlessly to the finish.

she actually wore some other stuff too


Met Gala Fug or Fab: Emma Stone in Prada

First, let us all discuss at length Emma Stone’s brunette dye job.

Emma Stone

I will miss her as a redhead, but I’m not mad at this, either. I’m sure it’s for a role and she’ll be back to lighter pastures soon, but she’s proving to be a person who can wear pretty much any hair color and have it make sense on her. As for the dress, it’s one part Middle Earth Chastity Belt, and one part what the Kardashian Waist Training Gizmo will look like in 100 years when their andoid selves run this entire planet. I’ll say this for Prada: Between Emma and Katy Perry, that brand did not snooze on this gala.

[Photo: Getty]


Met Gala Fug or Fab Carpet: Ciara in H&M

This has grown on me since I saw it last night:

MET Costume Institute Gala 2016

The hair is giving me a Halle Berry in X-Men Visits The Great Gatsby vibe, which is actually a cross-over I’d totally watch. The dress is, at least, lined — which is NOT always a given at these events, and while I feel like it might not be lined as elegantly as I’d hope, I am also not a woman to look a gift-liner in the…huh. That metaphor really got away from me. But you know what I mean, right? Right. Could be worse, is what I’m saying. Carry on, Ciara, is what I’m saying. Carry on.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Met Gala Fugs and Fabs: The Louis Vuitton Boot Brigade

The French label’s four favorite people (of late) all paired chunky Doc Marten-esque boots with their couture. Which feels less specific to this event once you realize the aesthetic is ripped off the runway.

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[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]


Met Gala Well Played For Another Event: Blake Lively in Burberry

As Heather just said to me, Blake looks GREAT in this…but, like, for Cannes. I sometimes think Anna Wintour must look at people’s ensembles at this event and mutter to herself, “does NO ONE care about MY THEME?”

[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]


Met Gala Fug or Fab: Gigi Hadid in Tommy Hilfiger and Zayn Malik

“Patience, my pet,” Gigi cooed.

Zayn Malik, Gigi Hadid

“Behave yourself, and you may crush the human trashpile of your choosing. But first we have a job to do. And that is to bleach the Earth of all who do not submit to the pop culture behemoth that is Zaygi Madid.”

except he looks like a bozo