Fug the Show: Reign Recap, season 2, episode 2, “Drawn & Quartered”

This show! This show. Oh, this show. It manages to be confusing and convoluted and overly simplistic at the same time, and it’s as cheesy as a fondue challenge on The Amazing Race but it certainly is entertaining. This week, Mary’s abject stupidity comes back to bite her in the ass and people start getting possessed.

Remember last week when the Plague was in town, killing people off (although no one you REALLY cared about) and ruining people’s lives? Remember? In case you don’t remember, look at all these dead people!


The make-up department clearly had a blast with the Plague, by the way — all the bodies looked disgusting, so well done, Hair and Makeup.  And the Plague has run its course (I have no way of telling what the passage of time is on this show. I assume it’s been about a week since the previous episode, but you should know that I literally started thinking, “well, Francis comes home, and it probably would have taken him…well, he’s got a baby in a carriage, so he’s not as fast as he would be on his horse, and….” as if I could apply earth logic to a show that — PLOT TWIST — is going to end an episode with a dead man briefly possessing a nursemaid), and poor hot Bash is working his hot ass off going through the palace to find the dead, and assuring they get a proper burial:


This is only, as you know, my second episode of this show, but I might love him. You’re supposed to, right? He’s the illegitimate son of the king so he has angsty issues, I presume, about his place in this world, which is always sexy, and he’s totally respectful of the dead, which is a plus. I mean, sure, he’s also maybe having visions and last week he spent like forty-five minutes with his face planted on a wall, but still.  I’d also like to note that Bash, so far, can really work a pair of leather breeches.

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Well Played, Emma Stone


I will not mince words:

Emma Stone Visits "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"

This is simple, but perfect on her, and I love everything about it and I basically want it to be mine. MINE ALL MINE.

[Photo: Getty]


Fug the Show: The Good Wife Power(suit) Ranking, season 6, episode 4

How much do you want to bet that The Good Wife hopes Julianna Margulies will call her old pal Intern George and solicit a cameo from Amal Alamuddin? She and Alicia could powersuit the HELL out of it together.

13. Diane & Cary


This shot is apt for how these two functioned this week: largely in tandem, neither in stark relief. They’re here to give information only: The State’s Attorney’s office subpoenaed Lemond Bishop’s business records on some trumped-up tax charge — well, it IS the town that got Al Capone for something similar — and are hoping Florrick Agos Lockhart will comply, because it’ll set a precedent Daniel Castro and Finn can use against them in Cary’s criminal trial. They’re basically calling to ask Alicia for advice, even, as if she’s the big boss. Might as well write the word “Power” on a piece of paper, wrap it up in an old Marshall Fields box, and give it to her with a note that says, “Be my guest.”


“Mr. Bishop, I don’t have much to do this week, so excuse me if I forego the jewelry. It’s not worth it.”

This is from Diane’s and Cary’s other moment. They flank Alicia, putting her thusly front and center, during an awkward conversation in which she tells Lemond Bishop they need to stop representing him. I don’t think Alicia told them that it’s because she’s arranging deck chairs on the Titanic of her candidacy (in the sense that even if she wins, I Have Great Concerns); she’s pinning it on conflict of interest, which I’m sure Diane and Cary welcomed, because it means Daniel Castro can’t manipulate them as much. But in this chess game, right this second, they’re the pawns and Saint Alicia is the queen. And Bishop is the bishop, just for synergy purposes and because he’s really good at making diagonal moves that still keep him going forward.


Diane is all about the patterns this week. Maybe because she didn’t seem certain either way what to do — obey the subpoena, or fight it — and so the swirls reflect her roiling mental state. Or, she just thinks they’re pretty. Sometimes a pattern is just a pattern.

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Well Played, Amal Alamuddin Clooney


It seems on her official website Amal has changed her name to Clooney. I actually don’t generally care one way or the other what people do with their surnames after marriage, as long as it’s what’s right for them and their family. But in this specific case, I HAD sort of hoped she would be like, “Thanks, Intern George, but I already had this thing on lock without you.”

Edited to add: This link about what she’s doing in Greece is lifted from the comments. She’s working for Greece in its fight to get the Elgin Marbles — fifth-century antiquities that were part of the Parthenon – returned there from the U.K. That sounds like an extremely fun day job. I would LOVE to fight with people over who gets the awesome art. Joint custody, anyone?

[Photos: Getty, Splash, AKM-GSI]


Fug the Bangs (And Other Stuff): Beyonce

Blue Ivy’s safety scissors couldn’t cut butter, but apparently they CAN cut bangs. A beytrayal of the highest order.

[Photos: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet]


Your Afternoon Man: Kit Harrington

In full Jon Snow hair:

UK Premiere of "Testament of Youth" **USA ONLY**

But with bonus three-piece suit (and even more quizzical than usual expression).

[Photo: AKM/GSI]