Oscar Party Fug Carpet: Cameron Diaz


Cameron Diaz appears to have caught High And Tight Syndrome (possibly from Heidi Klum, who has grappled with it all her life and should really start a foundation). This is a dress that screams, “BUT DO YOU GET IT?” and we yell back, “WE DO, AND WE WOULD STILL HAVE GOTTEN IT WITH AN EXTRA FIVE INCHES.” Because guess what this dress originally came with? An extra five inches. Which she sawed off just to underline It, highlight It, circle It, and then put squiggly Cathy sweat lines around It. Between that and the bad pocket and the whiff of desperation — it smells like astroturf and sweat – I can’t help being disappointed. Cam was so flawless last season — for the ceremony and the post-party — that I really wish we could get a do-over here. There is more fabric on her chest than on her thighs. Also, did she forget makeup, or am I just being overly hard on her? In the close-up… I don’t know. It’s there, but it’s not. I just want some false eyelashes up in this thing, you know? Just to see. Just to TRY. Instead all her effort went at reminding you that she’s totally cut. Cam, you could’ve spread it around a bit.

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Comments (34):

  1. val.
    0

    Wow. She could have gone up a size.

  2. Lina
    0

    Um. Okay I have NEVER thought of Cameron Diaz and “trashy” in the same sentence before, but holy crap. What HAPPENED here?

  3. Molly
    0

    Another three inches would suffice. But only if she goes up a size- this thing looks like it was spray painted on her body.

  4. vjld
    0

    Not loving the dress but this is how you do a bootie, if you must. The contouring at the top of the shoe lengthens her leg instead of slicing it like a right angle as with most shoeties, booties, etc.

  5. Linda66
    0

    I just need to express that I sure will be glad when “Bethenny Ever After” gets all the way out of my grill.

    And yeah, Cameron needs to give us all a break and put on some makeup. She’s a movie star on the red carpet at the Oscars. Makeup. That is all.

  6. LG
    0

    Remember a few (couple? some? I dunno, I’m drunk — time for some affirmations) years ago when she went to some… Kids’ Choice/Nickelodeon/Whippersnapper Awards show wearing this amazing pink dress and the trashiest iridescent metallic shoes ever? And she managed to look super cute and California and blonde and enviably leggy and yet, strangely, not at all like Jennifer Coolidge trying to get it on with Stiffler (see: above photo)? This is way too attention-whore MOTB/chicky-chicky-boom for any red carpet, especially when she’s WAY WAY too young, hot, and fun to be either of those things. Get a grip, Cam.

  7. Molly
    0

    Is it possible she FORGOT the Oscars were last night? She was out doing her Cam thing and having a ball and looked at her phone and was all HOLY CRAP IS IT REALLY THAT TIME? and so ran home and grabbed the first thing she could find and this is the result?

    I think if this is the case, she should have just worn the shoes and used her purse to strategically cover the naughty bits. The end would be the same and a lot more interesting!

  8. miwome
    0

    You know, I think the Marines might object to your use of the phrase “high and tight.” On the other hand, what with all that time at sea, maybe they’d be cheering it on.

  9. Jill
    0

    As age goes up, hemlines should come down. She would have looked far better in the dress pre-alterations. And a face like hers that is not naturally pretty definitely needs cosmetic assistance.

  10. geemee
    0

    My first thought: “Did she get this at H&M?” Not that I have a problem with H&M, mind you, but not on Oscar nite. Also: I’ve never thought her legs were all that. There are queens on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” with much better gams. Also also: DESPISE booties.

  11. Kayla
    0

    Ugh. Cameron Diaz. Bloody hell. Way to ruin a potentially cute — not earthshattering, but cute — dress. My first thought before reading anything was “This would be cute just above the knee. And a size bigger. And, y’know, not on Cameron Diaz.”
    Is anyone else sickened by her Madonna-esque sinew and muscle?

  12. Rayna
    0

    Alas, most unfortunate. I love me some Cam, but looking at her last year, all glam and gorgeous and classy, and then THIS. Gaaah! It makes me sad.

    The dress as originally shown would have been lovely. As it is here, it’s just indecent. There, I said it.

  13. Moi
    0

    Something this short and this tight should look more feminine, no? But I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look more surfer dude.

  14. cranky old batt
    0

    Trying too hard is what I “get”.

  15. Mongerel
    0

    Bionic BadTaste.

  16. Sandy
    0

    Love CAM, but this screams “Not aging well”.

  17. VintageVamp
    0

    Wow, way to ruin an otherwise nice dress.

  18. Linder
    0

    So, I’m fairly certain that, based on these photos, Cameron and Ke-dollarsign-ha should play sisters, or mother/daughter, or SOMETHING. It’s creeping me out/making me giddy.

  19. fritanga
    0

    This is the fashion equivalent of her new movie “Bad Teacher,” in which she plays a teacher who curses a lot, writhes around on desks and cars in abbreviated clothes, and tries to seduce former BF Timberlake. Yep, desperation is right. I’m sorry that Jennifer Lawrence is nipping at your heels, Cam, but stunts like this dress only make you look older and sadder.

  20. anner
    0

    The least this dress could do is not be in an animal print satin. And yet it insists.

  21. Carmen
    0

    C’mon this is CLASSIC Cameron, not a fan of her style but it’s nothing new for her, I just found it a bit *meh*, nothing to write home about (good or bad). I will disagree with the Fug girls about the makeup: I LOVED HER MAKEUP! Pretty, natural and classy, it was her anti-dress.

  22. NYCGirl
    0

    We don’t need to see your Mila Kunis, Cameron.

  23. Beth
    0

    Agree with Carmen, it really isn’t anything new for her. I totally clicked the link to the runway version, thought “the longer length really is needed to balance out the ruffle,” then came back and read the rest of the post saying that there’s more fabric on her chest than her thighs. The girl is suffering from what i’m afraid Halle Berry has been veering toward recently (though not last night, thank goodness)–actress around 40 (Cam may not be 40, but the tanning has made up the extra 2 years) who still has a hot body and is starting to panic that she’s not the hot new thing she was in the 90s, and therefore wears short and/or sheer clothes to show that she’s still hot. (I, on the other hand, am suffering from a really long sentence.) Girls: we know you’re still hot. Prolong your careers by not looking trashy.

  24. vandalfan
    0

    Nice dress for a much younger gal.

  25. Hansengirl1168
    0

    That’s not missing five inches, that’s missing a foot. Yep, she’s trying far too hard.

  26. Chicklet
    0

    “Oh, it’s Karen Walker. I thought I smelled gin and desperation.”
    - Beverley Leslie, “Will & Grace”

  27. AnaBe
    0

    She looks like a Bedrock hooker, the day after a major “party”.

  28. meg
    0

    Why does she always go there? Yes, she’s hot and fit, but so is almost every other actress on the red carpet. She should just wear the dress she wore in The Mask and call it a day.

  29. gryt
    0

    It’s a perfectly goodlooking bathing suit.

  30. Joni Woodhead
    0

    @Geemee .. I never liked Cam’s legs , too skinny. But soo many queens have such great gams! you’re totally right

    @Kayla .. completely sickened by her hulking shoulders

    @AnaBe .. ROFL, totally a bedrock escort’s dress

  31. Caroleena Stantonova
    0

    This dress is wrong all over.

  32. Md Tareq
    0

    Why does she always go there? Yes, she’s hot and fit, but so is almost every other actress on the red carpet. She should just wear the dress she wore in The Mask and call it a day.

  33. Md Tareq
    0

    This dress is wrong all over.

  34. Abby
    0

    She is dressed like Bam Bam from the Flintstones.