Oscar Fug or Fab Carpet: J.Lo and Cammy D


fug-or-fab

J: HOLA LOVER.

C: HOLA LOVER.

J: Nice try, SO CUTE, GRACIAS FOR COMING, but you wouldn’t know how to HOLA LOVER if it hit you on la cabeza with a surfboard. Do not even attempt it, James Cameron.

C: No, no, I’m Cameron Diaz, not James Cameron.

J: I care about that as much as you cared about your makeup. HAHAHA. I GOT YOU, CANDACE CAMERON. Don’t mess with my block.

C: You’re a nutjob.

J: Lopez for president! Viva 2013!

C: There isn’t an election in 2013.

J: YOU SAY THAT NOW, CAM NEWTON.

C: I… never mind.

How did J.Lo do?

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And Cameron?

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[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (87):

  1. What what
    0

    All I see when I look at J.Lo is… The Incredible Hulk.

    • pixie
      0

      Her backside looks like a a ladies’ “powder room” sofa. =D

      • CranAppleSnapple
        0

        Is she the only one that hasn’t noticed that her ass is now five times wider than the rest of her? It’s not the apple-shaped badonkadonk it used to be. It is in fact, a sofa, like pixie said.
        My point, don’t back it up at us.

      • Alicey
        0

        THANK YOU!
        I was thinking I’m a terrible person, but my first thought was “ugh, her ass is disgustingly huge”. Not that I think larger ladies aren’t attractive – or that JLO is a ‘larger lady’ – but that thing is WAY out of proportion, and the dress makes it look so much worse.
        I’m fine with big butts, big boobs, big tummies, big anything. I’m not fine with “look at my amazingly sexy ass” when, frankly… Well. You ladies have already said it.

  2. Beth
    0

    J. Lo’s dress is terrible.

    They just seemed ridiculous when they turned around. They couldn’t keep their faces straight long enough to pull it off, and I can’t tell whether they just wanted to show off their rear ends, or whether it was an attempt by Lopez to fix her dress during the break.

  3. Feena
    0

    J Lo is the queen of the red carpet. Always flawless! Love love love her. Ole!

  4. BrownEyedBetty
    0

    I didn’t understand this moment. Not sure what they were going for – but dress adjustment makes some sense. Either way, embarrassing for both. They were the only ones laughing which is never a good thing….

  5. Diana
    0

    Did no one else find it hilarious that they had JLo say the line about how your clothes should be “…loose enough to show that you are a lady” while dressed like that?!? I mean, she’s hot and looks fantastic. I just thought it was ironic.

    • Amanda
      0

      Yes! I was like “listen to your words JLo, put it away for once!”

      • Chasmosaur
        0

        That so cracked me up. Edith Head designed such beautiful things. She probably wouldn’t have let J. Lo anywhere near them.

        As for Cam’s dress – a color would have been great. She looked so pretty in 2010 – this was just such a let down.

    • Squirrel!
      0

      You betcha.

    • Talley
      0

      I’m pretty sure I could see nipple AS SHE WAS SAYING THAT LINE! And even if I couldn’t and it was just a shadow or something, a dress that gives rise to that sort of question=not ladylike!

      • Ruth
        0

        I thought the same thing. The dress was hovering on the edge of the aureola. I’m pretty sure they were both partially exposed. Why didn’t Cammy say anything???

      • Sandala
        0

        Definitely.

    • mepe
      0

      Yes! I shouted “how can she say that line while I’m pretty sure her nipple is popping out of her skin tight bodice”?! I’m sure the writers knew this would be funny coming from JLo!

    • Shiitake
      0

      “loose enough to show you are a lady”

      Were those two slappers taking a poll?

    • notemily
      0

      J.Lo looked so PAINED when she read that line, too. Like “Seriously? Who scripted this? Did they KNOW it was going to be me reading it?”

    • NYCGirl
      0

      I am quite sure I smirked.

  6. Lindy
    0

    I liked JLo’s dress MUCH better before I went to zoom and saw that there is ILLUSION NETTING ON HER ARMS!!! WHY?!!!!!

    • Liz_bee
      0

      Really? Blegh!

    • Chasmosaur
      0

      I couldn’t get too angry about that. With the patterning of the dress, that was necessary to keep everything in place, I think

  7. A.J.
    0

    When I was watching the Red Carpet on E and they showed Cameron’s dress, I said to my mom, “Is it just me, or is it cold there?” She agreed it wasn’t just me. Nice accesories there, Cameron.

  8. daryl
    0

    Has Ms Lopez done more butt reduction? Her caboose seems smaller than it ever did while still be huge .. too bad she didnt move some of that butt fat to her boobs

  9. Sarah
    0

    The hem on J.Lo’s dress is off. Some of the stripes don’t line up.

  10. Kristen from MA
    0

    I Know that everyone is over the whole neutral thing, But I think Cameron Diaz looks great here. KILLER necklace!

    JLo just looks vulgar, as usual.

  11. Sajorina
    0

    I LOVE BOTH! I love JLo’s dress… It fits her beautifully! Her makeup is flawless, her jewelry & clutch are great, but that bun on the top of her head bugs me! Cameron could actually do some “Hola Lovers” of her own since she’s half Cuban, but I don’t think that’s how she rolls… I love Cameron’s dress, jewelry, hair & makeup! She was my sister’s favorite of the night and is definitely one of my BEST! FAB, Lovers!!!

  12. Jill
    0

    Jenny looks pretty much like how she always does. I thought her concern for Ryan’s tux was sweet (on the E! red carpet thing).

    Cammy looks much better than usual but still underwhelms me.

  13. neiges
    0

    It hurts to look at J.LO, gosh, that’s f****g horrible, in so many ways. My concern with Cameron Dias is that her face, nevermind, we shouldn’t talk about faces. But isn’t aesthetic surgery a thing you wear? In a way?

  14. Liz_bee
    0

    I really loved Cammy’s dress during the ceremony because of the way it moved. It fluttered beautifully, if not a little figure-skater-y. Now that I see it in stills I like it less, but I think it gets a bonus for making me gasp went she walked out on stage.

  15. Fawn
    0

    I am SO tired of neutrals. However, I really like both of these dresses. I think Cam’s is one of the best fitting and more interesting versions of a neutral I’ve seen in a long time, and the color doesn’t washer out like it does so many. I think JLos is beautiful, excepts for those awful arm cutouts. Why??? Why do they exist?

    But all-in-all, I like both dresses much better than I ever thought I would like any neutral.

  16. Sarah
    0

    I think both ladies look great, actually. J Lo’s dress looked better on tv than in photos.

  17. witjunkie
    0

    I think Cameron was one of my favorites of the night. I loved that dress, the ivory looked fresh and not dingy, the bottom was shiny and “ooo” without veering into explosion, AND may I just say, having the simple diamond necklace really made her look finished, instead of the bare fields of flesh people have been going for lately. Plus, I loved that she looked a little sunburnt on her chest. That is from actual sun, people. Witness.

  18. Josephine
    0

    Cameron’s is one of those oooh, almosts, for me. The fit is GREAT, the shape is flattering, and she can actually do that pale buff color pretty well, because she’s so tall and fit and California-girl-y. The embellishments are little prommish, but overall, it’s all right. Nice job not looking like mess, Cam.

    Jennifer Lopez….makes me tired in my soul.

    • Micaela Torregrosa-Mahoney
      0

      “Jennifer Lopez….makes me tired in my soul.”

      yes, so much this. I showed the picture of her to my husband and said that when I saw her, all I could think of was those pictures where you’re supposed to circle everything you find wrong. That dress would work on very few women, like maybe Sophia Loren in her prime. On Jennifer it just looks like a desperate cry for attention. And that topknot bun!!! For all that is good in this world, if you wear a flashy dress like that, wear your hair big & loose, not so tightly knotted up it looks like you’re going for a temporary facelift! Also, JLo was another woman committing a crime against proper breast-wrangling last night. If the fabric looks like it’s cutting circulation to your breast, you’re not doing it right, honey.

  19. Ariel
    0

    Cameron’s dress is …good. It’s really pretty and I definitely dig the matchy clutch. And her hair and make-up are…better. But Cameron please, just move on. You’re no longer a 24 year old beach babe, and that’s ok. But you need a new style.

    I kinda think JLo hit it out of the park. Yes, I could have done without the sleeve cut-outs. But other than that…wow.

  20. Michelle
    0

    I may have to be the voice of dissension here. I think Cameron looked… fine. Well, no. I think the dress on its own merits is quite pretty and has a lovely fluidity to it. It’s simple, but with something a bit extra. That being said, I don’t think the color works on Cameron. I think primarily because of the hair. That hair… is just. No. So not flattering on her, at all. And her face looks… off. I know this is meant to be about the fashion, but when the dress is so simple and color-less, you’re immediately drawn to what dimension there is and it’s her face/hair. Which, again, don’t do it for me.

  21. Miss Tee
    0

    All I can see is how awesome JLo looks. SO awesome that it’s upsetting. Does she drink the blood of the innocent? Is that how she stays so dewey and youthful? I don’t get it! Muy jealous. She has at least 5 or 6 years on me (I think) and she looks better every day and I look like a tired old hag. I’m going to have to find some innocents…

    Cam’s dress was so bumpy underneath. All I could see were seams – and for the love of all that’s good and holy, NIPPLE OUTLINES. I hate that so much! It is my #1 pet peeve on red carpets. Put some petals on that sh*t, ladies! Also, #2 pet peeve in formal wear? TAN LINES. She is also guilty of that. COVER. IT. UP.

  22. Stefanie
    0

    I LOVE this dress on J.Lo. LOVE IT.

    Cammy looks good too.

  23. mj
    0

    jlo is…jlo
    and i couldn’t even get to cam’s dress..i was too distracted by her mug! i know she’s no spring chicken (neither am i), but HONEY… i was SHOCKED at the closeups. girlfriend doesn’t look like she’s been using SPF-ANYTHING while out working on that rockin’ physique

  24. Martha Raab
    0

    I thought Cameron’s dress was pretty, but I didn’t like that I could see her nipples.

    When they did the turn around thing, I was put off by the fact that they were too busy giggling for us to understand whose name they read.

  25. maryse
    0

    facially jlo was gorgeous. and her dress was fine, although from some angles she looked really really hippy and it looks transparent from behind (and then there was the slip of nip). and cameron’s dress was fine too. i hated her hair though.

  26. Elissa
    0

    “My dress hugs my curves like a little tiny Fiat hugs the roads of the fake place we made in L.A. to look like my block.”

    Ha! Awesome. Best entry so far!

  27. corriner
    0

    “Ay, your bar is low like Marc’s platelet count!”

    I liked J Lo’s dress. I would haved liked it a lot better if it didn’t have tri-cep windows.

    And Cam’s, like so many others, would have been BEAUTIFUL in a colour. ANY COLOUR.

  28. Jill
    0

    Yes, Diana – exactly! I cracked up when J Lo said that.

  29. The Other Molly
    0

    If I asked someone to design a dress to make my butt look even bigger, JLo’s would be it.
    It seems like everything she wears screams “pay attention to me!!!”
    Diaz’s dress was so-so.
    It really was kind of an exhibitionist night for some.

  30. Andrew S.
    0

    Jennifer’s would be better without the sleeves

  31. Wordphreak
    0

    JLo looks slutty, as always. And why are they plugging their behinds? As it were.

  32. LG
    0

    J.Lo, as usual, managed to dress like a perfume bottle.

    I cannot abide Cameron Diaz, but I thought her dress rocked.

  33. Jen
    0

    Here’s what they changed into for the parties. I actually like Cam’s orange gown better than the one she wore to the ceremony and as usual J.Lo is all HOLA FIERCE!!

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2107214/Oscars-2012-fashion-The-quick-change-artists-went-red-carpet-ready-party.html

  34. mepe
    0

    OMG, does anyone else find these JLo posts ridiculously tedious?! Can we ever just discuss her outfit?

    • Heather
      0

      Isn’t that what we’re doing in the comments? Well, everyone else, anyway?

    • Maretha2
      0

      They are the ray of sunshine in my dark cubicle of office pain. May GFY J.Lo live forever, preferably wearing ridiculous outfits as well.

    • Ladyblahblah
      0

      The Parson’s Thesis Discussion Group is next door. The rest of us will continue to enjoy reading what JLo’s clothes would say if they could speak.

  35. Kristin
    0

    Wait, wait, wait, wait….how have you NOT taken on the ILLUSION NETTING on J.Lo’s upper arms?

  36. Crysh
    0

    Forget the dresses. The dialogue was HILARIOUS.

  37. eee
    0

    All I could see with JLo’s dress was the illusion netting. Illustion netting makes me sad.

    As for Cammy, I thought her dress was really quite nice. The bottom looked fluid and pretty, which is more than I can say for a lot of dresses with random sequins and that “napkins stapled to your dress” flutter. However, any good thoughts I had went away when her nipples took over. Is it that hard to put cups in a bodice so that the wearer’s nipples aren’t front row center?

  38. vandalfan
    0

    I stopped looking when I saw the illusion netting sleeve detail. Certainly Cam won the Battle Of The Coifs.

  39. Kyasarin
    0

    I’d have given Cam a higher score if I hadn’t been able to see her tan lines. Cam! This is why God gave us spray tanning!

  40. Carlitos
    0

    CANDACE CAMERON!!! heeheehee! You took it way back! This is my new favorite J-Lo post.

  41. Sarah
    0

    J. Lo needs to start dressing less….skanky. Slutty? I dont know the word. But she needs to cover up. She has kids. She isn’t in the same shape. And that nipple was definitely visible.

    Also, did anyone else think her forehead look REALLY lumpy. Like it was protruding or swollen. I just hate this look on her. Stop being vampy, smile at the damn camera.

    • Sajorina
      0

      The Sophia Loren is in her 70s? and has two grown sons, yet she still wears dresses like JLo’s… form fitting & showing cleavage! And, she looks gorgeous and regal every time! Is Jennifer going to dress like this when she’s Sophia’s age? I sure hope so!

  42. essex
    0

    I thought Cameron looked lovely. That’s how to wear a neutral. Loved the creamy simplicity with just the right amount of ruffly shimmer. The dressed also moved beautifully when she walked. The best hair I’ve seen on her in some time too! Oh, and I want her arms.

    Jlo is so frustrating. She has the natural gifts to look nearly perfect if she keeps it simple. But her taste for shimmer, plunge, body-con, cut-outs, ruffles, pastel-tinted fox, chignons, preferably all at once, leads us to images like what we see here. She’s the kid wearing the candy store.

  43. labyrinthine
    0

    I don’t know, Fug Girls. I kind of feel like J.Faux wouldn’t use contractions.

  44. kdl
    0

    All the variations on “Cameron” are killing me, but I think CAM NEWTON is my favorite.

  45. Kara
    0

    How does J.Lo get invited to the Oscars? She hasn’t made a good movie in a decade.

    Cameron needed a deep moisturizing hair mask and some nipple tape. Nice dress though.

  46. Veronica
    0

    Cam’s dress was okay. It’s nothing to write home about, but she looked pretty. I think I do prefer her with the slightly longer hair, though. I really wanted to like the dress she wore to the after party, as the color was daring and gorgeous, but was I the only one here who felt the fit looked too tight and ill-fitted in the midsection? (The fact that I had to type the words “too tight” to describe a dress somebody as fit and slim as Cameron Diaz is sort of disturbs me.)

    J. Lo is…J. Lo. I really just can’t think of anything else to describe it. She’s going to keep being J. Lo regardless of what we all think because for some reason it works to keep her in the spotlight, as exhausting as it may be to see her all the time.

  47. guerra
    0

    j lo looked amazing!! flawless like always! I agree she just doesnt age unlike poor cammy

  48. Anne B
    0

    I think they both look pretty delicious, actually. I could never rock anything like HOLA LOVERS’ bicep windows, but then again, I’m not La Mujer Mas Sexy En Del Mondo, am I?

    Fug Girls, the funniest part of your liveblog over at Vulture last night (I got in too late to participate) was all the Fuggers typing, “HOLA LOVERS” and “Besos lovers!!” when J-Lo hit the red carpet.

    See? See the difference you make? <3

    • Sajorina
      0

      They change & impact lives with their inspirational fugging… Thank you!

  49. Barbara Kerr
    0

    Cam’s dress… the bottom is incredibly wonderful, and the top is “meh”. I mean, I get that the top should be plain so as not to overcrowd the skirt, but does it have to be *that* plain?

  50. Naz
    0

    I feel like Cameron’s dress was just a smidge too tight. Maybe I’m crazy, but I thought it was just way too much information, you know what I’m saying?

  51. JANIEKETTLES
    0

    Well. I think JLo looks like an art deco lamp – and I actually mean that as a compliment. Or straight out of Metropolis. Cam looks fine. That dress fits. But my main question is this. Why is Lyle Lovett in 3?

  52. M.Amanda
    0

    Both are meh. J.Lo is trying just a bit too hard and at least Cam is trying, but she still could use some more polish or drama or something.

    On another note, I love that Cameron gave some celebrity duck face. I don’t care if it’s ironic or if she actually thinks that’s a sexy pose. It made me smile.

  53. Chris
    0

    I was kind of watching the Oscars (yes, yes, I know, the Oscars party I went to went all pear-shaped), and I think I immediately screamed, “OH MY GOD SHE’S WEARING PACKING TAPE.”

    Don’t get me wrong, I love Hola Lovers Jenny as much as the next citizen of Fug Nation (Fuglander?), and I think I may have found a couple of new quotes to live by (ex., “You cannot squat on my block. You will get arrested.”), but not even SWINTON could make me love UPS couture.

    Cammy’s hair…I know, it’s a thing, but it seriously looks like a broom. I almost want to shave the entire thing off and make her start over. J.Lo’s hair is very J.Lo and while it’s probably giving me a sympathetic migraine, I can’t fault it. Because that’s just what J.Lo DOES.

    Their butts are…their butts. I can’t imagine why Cameron even agreed to do that, as – while it’s still a very nice, shapely bottom – her posterior is nowhere near as iconic as Jenny’s, and inevitably got upstaged.

  54. NYCGirl
    0

    Who knew there were so many Camerons?

    Anyway. Srta. de la Calle does, indeed, need to put it away already. And Cameron’s dress goes from boring to tacky.

  55. chatham
    0

    Why were these two spaz attacks at a ceremony celebrating greatness in cinema? They are awful. Classless, sophomoric and unfunny. Emma Stone nailed the “funny.” These two need to stay home. And Jennifer Lopez looked like a cow with a fancy hairstyle.

  56. jocelyn
    0

    I think they look okay. yawn, wake me up when you cover J. Lo on the cover of V magazine omfgwtfstraponcrazyhuh.

  57. Soapstef
    0

    Cameron was a mess. She looked like she was bursting out on top. The tan lines were super distracting too!

    J.Lo was just her usual strange self. I don’t know why her stylist (if she has one) keeps letting her put her hair up! Her forehead is not her best feature! This time you could see the bronzer line above her eyebrows and the rest of her face was too dang shiny. Why don’t stars ever carry blotting tissues?!

  58. Helen
    0

    Loved the look on Diaz; Lopez, well… I mean, first of all, she looks beautiful, of course. How could she not? But I am so tired of her working the same scraped-back hair, smokey eye, and nude lip. This has been going on for at least 10 years. A face like that deserves better than for its styling to be stuck in time. And the dress? Stunning, albeit a bit too tight, but also stunningly inappropriate to the event. Jennifer, you’ve had money long enough to start classing it up a little, okay? The similarly super-low cut of the blood-clot dress was great for the after-party. But NOT HERE.

  59. Sharon
    0

    Why is Cameron Ditz even at the Oscars? JLo looked okay but doing a number to get everyone to look at your rear end is a bit much.