Modern Fugly


Freaking Marchesa strikes again.

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Comments (38):

  1. qwertygirl
    0

    Sometimes I wonder if these designers get drunk together and say, “No, wait–here’s what I’m going to do…” and then they all whip out their sketch pads, dash off these horrors and then go home to sleep it off. In the morning, before they can get in, their assistants find their sketch books, and not realizing it was a Fuzzy Navel-induced joke, put them into the production line. By the time the designer realizes what’s happened, it’s too late to pull it from the collection, plus they’re too embarassed to admit that it was a mistake, so they just let it go. And the celebrities don’t know it was supposed to be a joke, and buy this sort of monstrosity. The whole thing is just a cover-up by the fashion industry so that the world doesn’t find out how much peach schnapps the average designer goes through in a month.

    I think that describes Stella McCartney’s whole career.

    • Cranky Old Batt
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      This just says it all and I agree 100%. I mean, what other explanation could there be? I guess it helps that there is no end to dumb as a ficus celebutards to keep the cycle going.

    • Karen
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      Well, qwertygirl has certainly offered up a valid explanation for how the damned thing was designed–but what explains ANYONE’s decision to wear it?

      I can’t even imagine looking at myself in the mirror in that shmatte and thinking, “Yeeeeah….I got it.”

      • qwertygirl
        0

        I think alcohol was involved in that too! I theorize that all bad clothing decisions are, in some way, the result of an excessive intake of peach schnapps.

        I am in complete agreement with you. I cannot understand how anyone could look in the mirror that that and think, “YES. NAILED IT.”

        • Sweetsinger
          0

          Perhaps Ms. Bowen decided she wasn’t happy with her figure that day (PMS plus too much peach schnapps) and hey, that mess sure covers the curves!

    • anny
      0

      I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

  2. Elizabeth
    0

    So that’s where Bobby Trendy has been hiding—getting pissed on Hot Damn and taking random potshots at people with his tulle gun. So. Very. Sad.

  3. gail
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    Oh no! There seems to be an inverse rule of funny to fashion for women in Hollywood. The funnier they are the worse they dress.

  4. Margaret
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    Is Ty Burrell wearing brown shoes? And, oh the awkward look on Ginnifer Goodwin’s face….maybe she is just insanely uncomfortable for the duration of these events.

  5. Billie
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    On an entirely different note, how strained is Ginnifer Goodwin in that hug? Awkward!

    • ML
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      Perhaps the alien life form Julie Bowen was hosting on the front of that so-called “dress” was attempting to drain Ginnifer of crucial energy in order to feed whatever spawn its designers were drawing up for the next awards show.

  6. Andrew S.
    0

    I’m only here for that scruff. It’s scruff diddily umptuous

  7. alice
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    Looks like a project runway design gone way wrong. Like when they send them into the dollar store and ask the contestants to make a red carpet gown in 6 hours. Fast forward to the runway verbal beating by Nina saying it is overworked and dreadful, Heidi saying I wouldn’t be caught dead in that and Michael saying it looks like a blind three year old practicing origami…or something along those lines. How someone got paid to make someone look so awful, is quite baffling.

  8. maryse
    0

    i love phil.

  9. Leah
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    That thing only qualifies as a dress by the very widest definition.

  10. Shiitake
    0

    Origami by Marchesa Kills.

  11. mary lou bethune
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    At least they are having fun and look like they appreciate having lovely clothes, attention, jobs, unlike certain the previous K and the other K ( the highest paid actress?) insane- does anyone think she is all that good ?

  12. vandalfan
    0

    Honestly, they just took all the fabric that was intended to be a proper back, sleeves, and jacket, and wadded it up and jammed it on to her front like the most elaborate lobster bib imaginable.

    • G
      0

      And after all that, it gives her a sunken chest and distended belly in photos. Ugh.

  13. Sandra
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    Okay, that’s Marchesa and Stella McCartney that are going on the ice-burg. Anybody else we should send with them?

  14. BrownEyedBetty
    0

    Gift Bag for a wine bottle.

  15. TaraMisu
    0

    What. The. Hell.

  16. witjunkie
    0

    Haaaaa Jessica, a bridal shower bridesmaid bouquet is EXACTLY what that looks like. The strap across the back is the ribbon you string through the paper plate so the girls have something to hang on to.

    Phil Dunphy is looking pretty Don Draper in that photo!

  17. Heta
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    Could she possibly be pregnant? That Marchesa certainly makes her look so.

  18. understateddiva
    0

    I’m pretty sure “modern fugly” is the tagline for Marchesa’s fall collection.

  19. Gin
    0

    The last time I attempted to sew anything was in high school sometime back in the Paleolithic era, I’m so terrible at it that more than one item of clothing has been “repaired” with staples. Yet I still feel I could produce a more professional looking evening dress than Marchesa. All the frilly frou is not to my taste but I can ignore that, I cant ignore that it ALWAYS looks like they got drunk and threw some tulle and sparkly stuff into a tumble drier with a tube of glue. I would rather wear a hessian sack than Marchesa frock, the sacks at least look well constructed.

  20. Kashif Ch
    0

    The post is so nice and having a great ideas .

  21. katdunn
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    Her face looks so pretty in these pictures… maybe she gained one or two needed pounds? She looks healthy.

  22. Mongerel
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    The dress looks like a mangled car crash.

  23. flitzy
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    It reminds me of the sheet paper that peeks out the top of gift bags. Only this time someone went berserk with tape and the paper, because it wouldn’t stay in the bag.

  24. Evalyn
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    This is what happens when designers use glue guns and staplers instead of sewing. Is that wad of stuff attached directly to her chest? Ouch.

  25. fritanga
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    I know Bowen thinks (and her stylist probably told her) that because she’s so paper thin she can pull off a giant poof of metallic tissue paper stapled to her abdomen, but, NO. It is NOT “interesting.” It does not make her look “daring” and “edgy.” It is just wrong.

    It does make her look foolish and as if she’s trying way, waaay too hard, though.

  26. Hayley
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    Maah ha ha ha the shot of Ginnifer Goodwin over her shoulder in the second photo – WTF?! She looks like she has the President of the Galaxy’s head like in Hitchhiker’s Guide, only it’s G.Good and not Sam Rockwell. Love it!

  27. One Direction
    0

    The homo “community” keeps saying she’s a homo and she agrees with them, so that is likely obviously the reason behind her fashion nonsense and everything else she does in her life.