Modern Fugily


I would have called this a scrolldown fug, except it’s actually problematic everywhere you look.

Basically, this dress is the frumpiest identity crisis a showgirl has ever had.

[Photo: Getty]

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Comments (17):

  1. Gigi
    +7

    Yeah, it starts out all sassy mother of the groom gonna kick it up at the reception, but by the waistline the kicky facade crumbles in the face of all the skinny bridesmaids and ends up crying tears of shimmery rayon. It needs either anti-depressants or a single silver fox to offer her a drink and ask her to dance.

  2. goldfish
    +10

    I’ve seen that as a shower curtain in the professionally decorated condo of a recently divorced man.

    Which may be the look she’s going for, I don’t know.

  3. Allyn
    +5

    The bottom half looks like she cried some serious mascara tears.

  4. stacie
    +5

    She is so pretty. Why does she never dress well? New stylist, stat.

    • Amalia
      +3

      Maybe ANY stylist, stat? She might be one of those who likes to DIY the red carpet. Judging from appearances, I mean.

      • Katharine
        +1

        Julie Bowen has the same stylist as Kristen Stewart, Tara Swennen, and in a recent interview explained that the latter was trying to get her to wear more revealing stuff. This looks like an awkward compromise between being covered and uncovered.

  5. ceecee
    +7

    it looks like an oil slick.

  6. Sandra
    +7

    Her Hefty Cinch-sack is breaking down in the sunlight.

  7. littlepurpledragon
    +1

    Her hair always looks so not-done. It’s always in this really hurried mom twist, which looks great when she’s being Claire, but so blergh otherwise.

  8. Michelle
    +1

    I kind of like it. It seems a little kicky and different. And also something that might have looked better in person than in photographs

    • Louise
      +1

      Phew, I thought I was the only one! I would totally wear… a version of this

  9. haterade
    +2

    She looks like she’s been tarred and Sofia Vergara is hiding around the corner with feathers

  10. Guerra
    +1

    I like this but not on her, she doesn’t fill it out enough. It’s just sort of hanging on her ruining the effect.

  11. Helen
    +1

    Sigh. I do not care for Julie Bowen as an actress. She’s ruined every scene I’ve seen her in (I don’t watch Modern Family, fans of the show, please no tar and feathers). I darned near stopped watching Ed because of her, and I LOVED Ed.

    So in my view, pretty much all she has going for her is that she is very, very pretty! And, reportedly, also really nice.

    Now if her stylist would just put her in things that acknowledge and flatter that prettiness, we’d have something lovely to look at, here. Instead, we have… I’ve got it! I know who this was made for. A 25- to 30-year-old clone of Anjelica Huston.

  12. Lily1214
    0

    There’s something wrong with this dress but I can’t think what.