The color of this dress is deep and magnificent.

The cut is also extremely flattering, save for the usual razor-sharp nipple darts that pock the chests of nearly every Prada gown. Here, the lace bib offsets it a bit, but it’s also flirting with Schoolmarm. The base is more Old West Brothel Madam, and the wisps on the skirt are… quite possibly remnants of the Lost smoke monster. There’s a randomness to all that which feels like four people trying to have a conversation without fully speaking each other’s languages. She’s carrying it as best she can, but don’t you wish we could wipe the slate clean and start over with the embellishments? Or even give that blue fabric a pattern? It’s like Quantico in dress form: solid start, but limping confused and aimlessly to the finish.

This is what Chasty picked for the post-party.

It… is not my favorite. If I want portholes, I’ll take a cruise.

 

I am concerned that this started life as a throw on a reality show set. I’m all for recycling, but I hope it was disinfected first.

[Photo: Getty]