Mad Fug


So….

This pregnancy wardrobe is going to be entertaining, isn’t it?

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Comments (45):

  1. Geemee
    0

    (shamefully whispers) But I kinda like it.

  2. Emily
    0

    I don’t have anything against the outfit, but it took me a few seconds to realize that was January Jones. That eye makeup is crazy.

  3. Willow
    0

    there are several things jersey fabric should never be used for. This dress is one of those things.

  4. Amanda
    0

    Hmm… I like it. Not sure sure about the eye makeup. But the dress looks great to me.

  5. Jill
    0

    I couldn’t even RECOGNIZE her until I read the label at the bottom of the post! I was seriously like, “The eyeshadow is a crime against humanity, but who is this person standing with her head thrown back and her eyes half open?” And then, “Oh. It’s Betty Draper.” Why, Betty?

  6. LoriK
    0

    Does anyone know if excess eye shadow can cause birth defects? Because I’m a little worried about the wee one right now.

    The dress is no great shakes, but it’s the make-up and hair that are really freaking me out. It’s like all her inner annoying migrated to the outside of her head.

  7. Geemee
    0

    I’ve been humming Blondie’s “Rapture” every since I looked at this photo.

  8. Anne B
    0

    I am on record describing January as a “risk taker”. So here’s where I could be doing my own little Superior Dance, if I wanted to, yeah?

    I like the dress; I think she looks transformed, in a good way. Love the shoes.

    “Entertaining”? You have no idea. :)

  9. Lynne
    0

    Emily and Jill, I’m with you guys. It took me awhile to figure out who she was. That hair and makeup. Just… wow. I’m pretty sure I went to junior high with that girl. In 1982.

  10. Chicklet
    0

    So, the purple part of the dress was tied and wrapped and draped and then… sewn to the black part? I am so confused, and I haven’t even gotten to the eyeshadow part of my bewilderment.

  11. Kary
    0

    Didn’t recognize this person as January Jones for a full 20 seconds.

  12. AMS
    0

    I know I’m alone here, but I LOVE the eye makeup! I make no claim that is bears any sartorial relationship to the dress, but on its own, it’s an awesome use of color that pops but still takes second place to her actual face, and it does that thing eye makeup is supposed to do: it highlights her eyes. It’s the kind of thing I always wish I could achieve but then end up chickening out of. Props to her for rocking it.

  13. AMS
    0

    *it bears, not “is” bears, sorry.

  14. aa
    0

    what is that?

  15. Britt
    0

    I seriously thought that was Daryl Hannah. 20 years ago Daryl Hannah, but Daryl Hannah nonetheless.

  16. Erin
    0

    I’m another who didn’t recognize her, and I’m a huge fan of Mad Men… (but not a fan of Betty at all).

  17. Mary
    0

    @Britt: exactly.

  18. Sandra
    0

    Wow, a Flashdance leotard with a purple toga glued to it. And blue eye shadow from 1979. Kinda reminds me of some frat parties back in the day. NOT an appropriate environment for a developing child.

  19. sara
    0

    Yeah, so I didn’t know who this was until I saw the tag at the bottom of the post. She looks seriously whackadoodle (mostly because of the eye makeup). But since I learned from my sorority back in my long ago college days that I should end every critique with a positive comment… I like the purple color of the dress. :)

  20. Cecily
    0

    Didn’t recognize her. Still doesn’t look like her. The dress? Meh.

  21. K.
    0

    I didn’t recognize her either, with the roots (I know you’re not supposed to dye your hair while pregnant), the crazy eye makeup, and the mouth-breathing. I would have no beef with the dress if it were just the blue part, but it looks like she’s wearing it over an off-the-shoulder black top. Which I would also have no problem with (my shoulders are one of my favorite parts of my body, so I often wear shoulder-baring things) on its own. This just looks like two different things stuck together.

    And the eye makeup is insane.

  22. Molly
    0

    Is it just me, or is there a hint of Courtney “Beer Me” Love about her face here?

  23. vandalfan
    0

    It’s Loretta Switt, in about 1979, when M*A*S*H was getting a little long in the tooth, back when jersey, 3/4 sleeves, big color patches, bottle blonde, and that (shudder) eyeshadow were king.

  24. yeahandalso
    0

    Ugh as if we needed more reasons to hate her it is being very widely rumored that the father is Claudia Schiffer’s husband.

  25. Miz H
    0

    @Molly, you’re not alone. I thought the same thing.

  26. Anne B
    0

    Wow. Being pregnant in public continues to suck, huh?

    1) Of course it’s safe to wear eye makeup when you’re pregnant.
    2) Yes, it’s safe to have your hair colored, or even do it yourself (most women I know like to get it done; it gets harder to move around as the pregnancy progresses).
    3) Naturally her face looks different. The body changes throughout a healthy pregnancy; the face is part of the body. As I said, I think she looks great.
    4) When a woman says she doesn’t want to reveal the father of her child, the world should respect that. January makes enough money on her own never to need support payments from anyone.

    I’ve known at least three women who went through with what were at the time unplanned pregnancies alone, mostly because the men in their lives were in no position to support them. They did (are still doing) beautifully. This may or may not be January’s story. I don’t know her. Does anyone here?

    f you can find reasons to approve of Natalie Portman, Kate Hudson, or Jessica Alba, you can find reasons to approve of January.

    Especially the first two: Natalie and Kate aren’t married, either.

  27. Sajorina
    0

    Well, I had no idea that was January or that she was pregnant! I like her shoes, though!

    @Anne B: Nothing against January, but it’s different with Natalie and Kate because they are not married YET; they’re both engaged to their baby daddies, while January is not!

  28. putzmaroon
    0

    I kinda like it. Not a great pic though with the slightly leering mouth and the dead eyes.

  29. Anne B
    0

    Oh, riiiigghhhht. “Engaged”. So very important, even to a movie star.

    If one piece of jewelry means we judge *even wealthy women* differently for the presence or absence of a man in the picture, we are further behind as a culture than I thought.

  30. Ann
    0

    I’ll come right out and say it: I’m ALWAYS on board with 70s eye shadow.

  31. Lina
    0

    They’re remaking Bladerunner, right? This is Priss, right? Right? I mean, there really isn’t any other excuse, is there?

  32. becs
    0

    I’m guessing “oh boy, I get to shop for maternity clothes” is not one of the thoughts that popped into her head when that pregnancy test came up positive. I for one, will be giving her a break in the wardrobe department for the next 9 months or so.

  33. Frances
    0

    I think she looks pretty great! I also did not recognize her right away, probably because I mostly know her as Betty and this, clearly, is NOT Betty Draper Francis. And as for the eyeshadow, I kind of secretly (just between us, kay?) love it.

  34. witjunkie
    0

    I NEVER recognize January Jones. Every time I’m like, who is this? And then I’m amazed – again – that it’s January Jones. Why does this happen? I always picture her as the Girl in Wisconsin Bar from Love, Actually (“Strawwwhhh!”) and she hardly ever looks like that girl.

  35. Daffodil
    0

    She looks so unlike herself. I’m another one who had to read the nametag at the bottom of the post to catch on. And I’m not wild about the parts or the sum of what’s going on here. But you know what is most amazing about this dress? She looks as if she has a waist! See that horizontal purple fabric in her waist-al area? It kind of nips in! Which is messing with my head a lot a lot a lot. I mean, when I was pregnant, I quit looking as if I had a waist about five minutes in. Didn’t have a hope in the world of looking as if I had a waist when I was as far along as January is here.

  36. Nora
    0

    My first thought was, “Girl Who Plays Starbuck On “Galactica”, what the hell are you wearing?

  37. Kate
    0

    Katee Sackoff would never wear such nonsense.

  38. peanut gallery
    0

    well, I think a lot of people have captured my thoughts on her eye make-up, but I am a bit jealous of how she can change her look up so much. She really looks like a different person in so many pictures. I, on the other hand, look almost the same in my running clothes and for black-tie events. i’d love to mix it up like she does…..just don’t know if I’d go so far as the eye make-up!

  39. Lauren
    0

    I don’t UNDERSTAND this photo. What is that makes her look so different? (apart from the bump, obv). Has she dyed her eyebrows blonde? I can’t put my finger on it.

    (And I don’t think LoriK was serious about eyeshadow potentially causing birth defects…;))

  40. ChaChaheels
    0

    It’s the centre part in the hair that’s grieving me.

    As for the outfit–you have to give a pregnant girl credit. People hardly design good clothing for women in size zero, it cannot be easy to find something that looks good on you when your breasts and belly are the size of small farm animals. There’s no point in trying to hide or minimize pregnancy’s effects (so that twisting/draping effect in front, a sad attempt to create a kind of waist line, is just an example of how not to do it). Best thing to do is what the best dressed Plus Sized ladies do: neat, tailored clothing (flounces, ruffles, pleats, gathers, bows–all of it is bad) that fits properly; and accessorize with amazing jewelry, gorgeous make-up colours, hairstyles that take advantage of your great pregnancy hair, and really beautiful shoes.

  41. Faye
    0

    I always find myself defending January Jones on this site, even though I don’t *love* her — maybe because she gets so much hate here (most of which I’m convinced is Betty Draper transference). Anyway, this dress is definitely weird, but I think she gets points for choosing something that covers her, unlike the bare-belly flaunting pregnant celebs we see. Also, it minimizes the baby bump quite nicely.

    As for her single-parent status, it’s not something I would ever choose for myself. However, it seems a bit hypocritical to me to condone pre-marital sex but call out someone for being a single parent. I mean, pregnancy is a natural result of sex, so why is the former tackier than the latter? Re the rumors the baby is Matthew Vaughn’s, they are just that, rumors, and until either party confirms them, I don’t think it’s fair to criticize January. And I’m with Anne B – it is utterly ridiculous to elevate celebs like Natalie Portman (who started up with her fiance while he was with someone else), Jessica Alba, and Kate Hudson over January for being pregnant just because they have a ring on their fingers.

  42. Emma
    0

    I seriously thought that was Courtney Love.

  43. Noire
    0

    Honest to god I thought this was Kimberly Stewart. Which made sense in my head because she is also currently pregnant. This dress is not doing January any favors, the makeup is just sad, and the sex hair only exacerbates the whole situation. She needs to start all over again, but this time, her hair needs some actual effort, reduce the tranny shadow, and put her in a dress that doesn’t look like its made out of the worlds cheapest fabrics.

  44. Lady Satan
    0

    I keep flicking back and forth between the eye shadow and the dress, trying to figure out which one is worse.

    I think they eyeshadow wins by a narrow margin.

    The dress is awful though. It looks like she was going to go for the no-pants look in an 80s black spandex bodysuit then realized it was a bit chilly out and wrapped a cozy jersey sheet around her middle to keep her bump warm.

    Electric blue eyeshadow … SMH.

  45. Erika
    0

    Wow. Didn’t know she was pregnant, and couldn’t care less about the father and her relationship (or lack thereof) with him.

    But yeah, bad ’80s jr. high flashback. I’m now singing “Rapture” *again*.