LETTER OF TRUTH: X-FILES Y’ALL


Hey y’all WHY DO I KEEP DOING THESE FACES TO MY FACE? I don’t know. What if it freezes in one of these and then People magazine will do a cover story and call it BRITNEY SPEARS FROZEN FACE TRAGEDY and People en Espanol will call it BRITNEY SPEARS TRAGEDIA CARE CONGELADA and it will be so embarrassing. (I am learning Spanish in my dressing room because telenovelas are so interesting but I can’t always tell who wants to push who down what.)

[Photos: Getty and Splash, y'all]

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Comments (30):

  1. sarah
    0

    This is exciting and all…but KARDASHIAN!!! CHRISTMAS!!! CARD!!!! TODAY!!!!!!! I am going to be waiting patiently (or not so patiently) all day for you to fug it!

    • marie
      0

      KARDASHIAN KHRISTMAS KARD FTW! i’ll be patiently waiting Fug Girls! (or not..)

  2. Gine
    0

    Poor Brit. She just looks so miserable all the time.

  3. Daffodil
    0

    I heart Letters of Truth!

    Also, am I the only one who thinks that the Britney in the video looks more like Brittany S. Pierce than Britney Spears?

  4. pinkcheese
    0

    Telenovelas rock. My daughter and I love to watch and supply our own dialog a la MST3K, as neither of us speaks a lick of Spanish. So much drama! So many too small, half-buttoned shirts! So much clunky product placement!

    • Stefanie
      0

      Your comment made me laugh. When I was young, and we FINALLY got DirectTV (hello living in the sticks) I would come home and find my dad watching Telenovelas. I was always like “WTF are you watching!?! We dont speak Spanish!” And then one day I sat down with him…and I was hooked. We watched hours of TV having no real idea what was being said. Good times with Dad.

      • Steph
        0

        Latin Lover is great. It makes no sense (especially with my very basic knowledge of Spanish) and EVERYONE makes out with everyone ELSE.

        As for Brit, she looks uncomfortable. Not necessarily in the clothes, but just uncomfortable. It makes me uncomfortable.

    • Kat
      0

      MST3K is the best thing that ever happened to this world. Pure bliss.

      • TaraMisu
        0

        This.

        • Aspasia
          0

          I miss that show! But that same crew does the same thing (but on new movies!) in their new project RiffTrax. Only, there’s no censorship, so you can imagine what they’re saying.

          Anyway, Telenovelas are awesome.

  5. Stefanie
    0

    Brit looks so uncomfortable. I just want her to be happy, whatever that means.

    One of the only reasons I can stand Jason (Not that Im that vested in him) is because he does look like Sam from True Blood. Love Sam.

  6. TonyG
    0

    Merry Holidays and a Good New Year is my new greeting this season!

  7. Big Noise
    0

    Photo 3 = cheap imitation of Judy Garland in the “Get Happy” number from “Summer Stock.”

  8. Big Noise
    0
  9. Clarence Beeks
    0

    How many colors does she have that dress? She wears those damn bandage dresses all the time!

    • Tiffany
      0

      I think a supply of bandage dresses is in her contract. I wish I was kidding, but I am being serious.

  10. Rayna
    0

    Alas, I would actually let her have that embroidered leather dress if it ONLY FIT!!!

    Mistreating the girls makes me go all capsy.

    Sorry, y’all.

    • Orange Clouds
      0

      That leather dress makes her look like a Bavarian bar maid who has a side job as a dominatrix.

    • mosie51277
      0

      I know. The dress it actually cute, but did no one notice it didn’t fit her chest AT ALL?

  11. Evalyn
    0

    What I don’t get about men’s clothes today is: they look so uncomfortable in those suits. Like when you put your jacket on and forget to hold on to your shirt cuff and it bunches all up in your arm pit and you have to yank it down to get your jacket to fit and the sleeves to look right and not like you put on your little brother’s suit jacket? Well these guys didn’t do that and are walking around like thier shoulders are bound up in the jacket and they can’t raise or lower thier arms to a normal position which would all be solved by cutting the jacket to fit the man. Or wearing sleeveless shirts.

  12. Aria
    0

    Well say what you will about her multiple bandage dresses, but she looks a lot better than the other chick in this photo– though self tanner needs be dialed WAYYY back. And I love the leather dress, just needs a better fit.

  13. Sandra
    0

    I kinda like the black dress in the last slide. But whatever planet Britney’s living on, I don’t think it’s the same one as me. I wonder what color the sky is in her world…

  14. PB
    0

    I know it’s fun making fun of BSpears, but I must say she seems half way decent these days. A few years ago she was really on the tipping point between keeping it together and full Lohan. I am glad she didn’t decide to go full Lohan. One Lohan is more than enough.

    • Jessica
      0

      Amen. I love Britney.

    • Gauthier
      0

      I can’t believe I’m the first to say it but, speaking of Lohans… In that last pic she tragically looks like a Dina Lohan xerox.

    • Nancy
      0

      Her family did right by her. They put her in a real psychiatric for months, she got the treatment she needed. Too bad no one loves Lohan enough to do the same.

      Britney has been through hell and back. The girl has guts. I like her.

  15. Helen
    0

    Letter of Truth! My day is complete! I can’t even choose a favorite quote, this was all brilliant. No wait, I can – she totally would call them her “stories.” Perfection!

    And maybe it’s just because it’s Christmastime, or because I root for Spears like a mother (you know, a real one, not the one she actually got), but I think she looks adorable in all of these. Definitely too tan with the yellow, yes, but she’s wearing the hell out of it.

    Now if she could just show that kind of body confidence when she’s posing alone… hey, that’s it! Britney just always needs someone in the picture with her!

  16. chickadee
    0

    I was having a pretty bad day and trying not to cry at my desk when I saw the Orange Julius comments and I actually laughed out loud. Thanks for bringing some levity and a smile, girls :)

  17. Louise
    0

    Questionable posture notwithstanding, Brit Brit looks legitimately great in that black dress. Love the shoes!

  18. Matt
    0

    Dear Britney, wearing a hat doen’t mean you are smartly dressed: your boobs could float the Hindenberg