Fug or Fab the Gift: Kim’s Hermes Bag

I want to be clear: I am not fugging North West’s artwork. That kid isn’t even two years old. She’s not SUPPOSED to be doing anything other than swirling things around and making handprints with help from an adult. She didn’t make this with an eye toward it being photographed, because SHE’S BARELY A TODDLER. We are not making fun of her output. It’s totally a little girl having fun with this crazy-ass canvas someone handed her.

But let’s think about it as a gift. This is clearly Kanye trying to out-Angelina Angelina, by sticking North’s early artwork onto a couture bag rather than a custom wedding gown (I’m sure he’s super angry they didn’t think of making Kim’s a mosaic of North’s face, claiming North approved the sketch and personally glued every construction-paper tile). It is also, I think, a thousand times more soothing to receive than the infamous Bag, which, frankly, might have been every bit as horrifying to find in a box as a severed head.

Let’s check it out more closely, just to examine it:

I’m sure this is a COMPLETE transgression, but does that even look like a very NICE Hermes bag? It’s kind of wah-waaah to me, especially as compared with some of the other ones that exist and probably a bunch of her other purses. Did it HAVE to be a Hermes? Are they the only ones that are paint-safe? Are they the only purse purveyor who would give Kanye a bag after the last debacle? Honestly, as a gift, it kind of feels like Kanye ran out of ideas, then ran out to Barneys, then crossed his fingers. But if this means he’s going to decorate a Hermes for her every single year, well, we’re going to have A Rich History of Bags by the time North is old enough to do any of this under her own steam.

And between Bag and Bag 2.0, let’s be honest: the sequel wins by a mile. Right?

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