As I said to Heather last night, “at least Sandy looks GREAT from the neck up.” And she does!

11th Annual Warner Brothers And InStyle Golden Globe After-Party

The rest of this is…well, the color is nice. And the bodice is flattering. And…OH SANDY. As John Travolta might sing, “Why-yi-yi-yiiiii?” I suppose one could argue that the sheer-ness of this skirt is, um, mysteriously hinting at the goodies underneath it? Or that it’s, er…festive, as it has a distinct Eau de Gift Bag? Or….maybe it’s pleasantly reminiscent of a grape Popsicle (her leg being, of course, the wooden stick)? Oh, man. Sandra, I’m trying here. But then you had to go and do THIS:

67th Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Dude. This fabric looks like it’s about one lit match away from bursting into righteous flames of man-made fiber. THANK GOD it rained on Sunday.