Golden Globes Well Played/Fug Carpet: Christina Hendricks and January Jones


Christina Hendricks has the kind of fabulous bod that most designers wouldn’t know how to handle. Any time Project Runway throws the contestants a challenge to make clothes for mothers, or divorcees, or generally people who aren’t 5’10″and 100 lbs, they all start wailing and moaning that it’s not what their designs are about and it’s so haaaard, and blah blah blah. I always want Tim Gunn to come in and yell at them that if they can’t handle actual people’s bodies, then they have no business making clothes at all, because guess what? Sometimes people who eat carbs also want to shop and wear things on their bodies.

So bless Christian Siriano for not shying away from the resplendent curves and cleavage of Man Men‘s Joan:

This fits Christina like a dream — something other gowns often fail to achieve even on bodies closer to the sample-size shape — and she looks so happy and comfortable in it. Admittedly this seems a tad inspired by Peaches ‘n’ Cream Barbie, but I find it more interesting. Trust me. I owned that doll — she was my only Barbie, since I kind of hated Barbies/dolls in general and was more of a My Little Pony girl; they had all of the soapy shenanigans with the added wrinkle of being able to yank out their tails and trade — and I can say with certainty that P ‘n’ C Barbie was a boring girl. All she did was stand around and sing to herself while the ponies made fun of her for looking so freaking perky all the time. So maybe this is Peaches ‘n’ Cream Barbie’s saucier, more personable cousin, whose favorite belt is made of whiskey and who likes to dance on the piano and play Olde Tymey poker with those cards that only have the symbols on them. I’d hang out with that girl. Especially if she had Christian Siriano on speed dial.

Contrast the spirit here with what her co-star January Jones wore:

This is ripped from Lewis Carroll’s obscure and thus less beloved tome, Alice’s Adventure Through The Wilds of Depression.