Fugger Say Fugger


So I guess… there was a plot afoot recently to castrate and murder Justin Bieber, which the authorities foiled.

And I don’t mean to make light of it, because I have to imagine it’s scary to wake up one day and have a cop call you and say, “Son, some lady wants to cut off your junk.”  But… maybe that’s why he’s  been wearing sack pants? If you don’t know where it IS, then it’ll be harder to HURT IT.

… Nope, still no excuse.

[Photo: Getty]

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Comments (70):

  1. margot
    0

    He. Looks. SO. RIDICULOUS.

  2. Siobhán
    0

    A man, not a lady.

    I can understand wanting to punch him, to be honest. I want to from looking at that pic.

  3. Bella
    0

    Might that not be an act of “thinning the herd?”

  4. Jessica
    0

    I seriously think he is going to maybe win Fug Madness this year.

  5. Sylvia
    0

    With those pants, I question whether it’s there TO cut off. I’m sure it is, but he’s not helping himself.

    Also, because it can’t be said enough, this is God awful.

  6. Lola
    0

    This whole ensemble makes him look really misshapen and bizarrely out of proportion. And who’s bright idea was the bandana? He is so ridiculous, can he really take himself seriously?

  7. Ranee Singleton
    0

    I call these the “fully loaded diaper pants”. I can’t imagine why anyone would want to wear this look.

    • hb
      0

      I can’t believe he has so many pairs! like did he buy them in every colour, or do multiple companies actually make them?

  8. Cathy
    0

    Dye his hair bleach blonde and he would look just like Miley Cyrus.

  9. Aphy
    0

    As someone commented yesterday, why in the world are his eyebrows raised in these pictures?

  10. dessessopsid
    0

    I think he must have bought shares in the hideous crotchpant factory. It is the only thing that makes any sense. He is clearly trying to save the factory from closure, because no one else is going to wear those pants, so he has had to buy all the stock and now wear it.

    • Scouse Helen
      0

      I laughed at this A LOT. Altruism lies behind his fashion travesties. Actually, I think somebody genetically engineered Bieber in a lab. I refuse to believe that he is a human being. He is too too bizarre.

  11. Rachel
    0

    Please Hammer don’t hurt ‘em?

  12. Helen
    0

    Maybe he makes them himself? Or gets his mother to do it?

    I just can’t imagine any tailor agreeing to do this. Sure it would probably be a great gig financially, but that’s temporary; then your name is associated with those things forever, even if it’s only known among a few people. And they kinda have that non-expert, homemade look.

  13. Reg
    0

    this gotta be the most hilarious post. I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING. He is got to be the fuggiest of them all.

  14. Vandalfan
    0

    Yes, again with the perfectly groomed eyebrows.

    But y’all are so harsh on the kid! Turn the diaper thingie into jeans of the same color, loose the hat and glasses, and he’s just fine. OK, he could close his mouth while posing as well.

    • Heather
      0

      But the point is, he DIDN’T swap out the diaper pants for jeans.

      • Vandalfan
        0

        I’m just a sucker for a kid star, who may end up Lohanesque.

        At least it isn’t made of sheer mesh!

        • Bambi Anne Dear
          0

          Now that you mention sheer mesh I am now gagging for them to appear on these pages.

    • cc
      0

      lol yes, “Change EVERYTHING and he would be totally fine you guys!”

    • Aphy
      0

      So what you’re saying is that if he went home and changed, hed look better? Hehe.

      But seriously, he keeps going out in some iteration of this outfit, which means he likes it and thinks he looks good. He just flat out doesn’t.

    • The Fugger
      0

      Re: losing the hat: …uh, that’s his hair.

      You know, I liked it better when he had it longish and down. Yes, every teenaged boy in America and Canada (all two of them) were going to their barbers and requesting the Bieber, and yes, it did make him look sort of like a chick (and in fact led directly to Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber). But, to use a Bieberesque turn of phrase, it was more swag.

  15. Vandalfan
    0

    Just occurred to me- are those thingies by Stella McCartney?

    • Helen
      0

      Oh, yeah, good thought. Stella would explain it. And she’s never embarrassed.

  16. Jeszeeca
    0

    Why is his mouth always open? I can’t even focus on the pants anymore, my brain can’t handle it.

    • Sonya
      0

      Why are his brows always up and his mouth always open?! I just wish this kid would go away.

      As for that castrate and murder plot, I heard that on the local news in Chicago and the cameraman (in the background, of course) laughed LOUDLY over the news anchor right after the “castrate” part. Insert your own joke here.

      • Sally
        0

        All the NZ media must have been reading the same news feed because they all said there was a plot to “murder and castrate” him. I just couldn’t help thinking they got it in the wrong order – or maybe they just wanted a trophy after the murdering part?

  17. Kalli McQueen
    0

    I keep coming back to this picture because I sincerely do not comprehend it. Biebs is not a very statuesque person, so why is he being dressed in things that make him look twice as short? He may not be super muscle-y, but he can certainly wear something more fitted to his frame, that would be SO MUCH MORE flattering to him and to everyone else’s eyes. Lastly, he just needs to lose the sunglasses. I love sunglasses, but one of my pet peeves is when people wear them when it’s not sunny, like at night or indoors, because you know, there’s no sun!

    kompsi.wordpress.com

  18. cc
    0

    How does he keep getting more awkward?

  19. momo
    0

    Did Bieber get botox to freeze his forehead in that position or eyebrow lifts? He’s had that same expression in every pic you’ve posted.

  20. :paula
    0

    Are we sure he is not just wearing a sweater upside-down? He looks an awful lot like Catherine O’Hara making dinner for Dick Cavett et al in Beetlejuice.
    http://pinkme.typepad.com/pink-me/2012/05/librarian-to-the-stars-moms-edition.html

  21. drlemaster
    0

    This look is trying way to hard. It looks like he was dressed by some focus group that is trying to make him look as trendy as possible, but that also to a man hates him. (In a want to embarrass him sort of way, not a murder a mutilate way.)

  22. Laucie
    0

    If I were dressed like that, I’d pull the bandanna up OVER my face.

  23. Sandala
    0

    The castrator would have been very disapointed.

  24. Anita
    0

    I’m going to have to skip over these photos in the future because he makes me feel increasingly stabby.

  25. Lily
    0

    Is he trying to give us the impression that he…needs all that room in his pants? If you get what I’m saying? Cuz if that’s what he’s trying to imply….CHILD…BOO….BYE.

  26. FiestaGirl
    0

    Justin poses as those he’s auditioning for “ZOOLANDER” 2.0
    I can’t understand how his friends/family/handlers don’t tell him how stupid he looks! He used to be a cute kid with a great smile and now he looks like a douchey, gangsta wannabe. No wonder Selena keeps trying to dump him-RUN GIRL RUN AND DON’T LOOK BACK!

  27. Holly Hamilton
    0

    I don’t understand, but then I don’t make eleven million dollars a day either.

  28. openroses
    0

    I blame Usher.

  29. Hero2012
    0

    Well at least he does not look like a white lesbian anymore………he just looks like a korean one!

  30. Hero2012
    0

    Now he looks like a korean lesbian!

    • Faye
      0

      As someone who visited Korea multiple times and lived there for a while for work, I almost died laughing at at this comment – because *yes.* Politically incorrect, but totally accurate. Even the pose. I can’t un-see this now!

  31. ChristieLea
    0

    He was so much more palpable when he first made it big, because he was much more natural and at ease. This? This is one massive Tryhard . This is Nearing-The-Teen-Girl-Obsession-Expiry-Date-And-Trying-To-Be-A-Mature-Artist.

  32. pourgirl
    0

    Outfit ridiculous. eyebrows annoying. As always. But for the first time I feel some compassion for the kid. The plot against him sounds so vile, and two hapless would-be assassins were kinda sorta coming after him, via northern Vermont. OK, really stupid criminals, but still. Creepy.

  33. Liane
    0

    He looks like a dog that just came from the groomer with that bandana. A little dog. Like a Pomeranian.

  34. Jules
    0

    I can’t wait until Fug Madness.
    Maybe we’ll have our first male winner!

  35. Eli
    0

    THIS is what tween girls get their panties in a twist over these days? Ugh. I had far superior taste in my youth. New Kids on the Block never looked quite this stupid, and it was the early 90s, when everyone looked stupid.

    • Sonya
      0

      Thank you, I spit water out on my desk reading your comment. Then I had to shut my office door because I was laughing uncontrollably.

  36. Sabina
    0

    He is so embarrassing. Who decided to style him like a complete douche-bag?

  37. brooke
    0

    why doesn’t someone in his life just tell him he looks like a stupid hipster clown?

  38. JenH
    0

    Who, exactly, is responsible for this “skants” trend? I think they are meant to simulate the baggy “belt below the buttocks / pants on the ground” look for boys who are afraid to take risks. When I see skants on those adorable One Direction boys I wonder what lunatic is styling them. Does anyone buy these retail?

  39. susan
    0

    I just want to know why he always, and I do mean ALWAYS, looks so stupid with that ridiculous pose and STUPID expression.

  40. VanDee
    0

    Mwwwaaaaaaaahahahhahaaaaaaaaaaa!

  41. Garbo
    0

    He looks like a Tim Conway skit. Dorf on Pop.

  42. Emma
    0

    Weird thing is, if he wore the diaper-pants once you could have a laugh at his expense and chalk it up to youthful experimentation with ridiculous trends, but he’s been wearing variations on the diaper pants EVERY. DAY. As though they’re the new normal.

    Also, can he please stop sporting that perpetual expression of surprise, with his fuzzy little eyebrows arching over his Ray Bans. There is actually nothing wrong with just smiling for photos.

  43. Esme
    0

    I think he’s a Time Traveler who woke up naked in some undefined era and had to run around scrounging miscellaneous garment bits off the clotheslines of strangers. So . . . better than naked–maybe.

  44. Lily1214
    0

    I can’t manage this at all.

  45. mrbruno
    0

    He has those pants in black too but it still doesn’t work… It looks as though his diaper is full, sagging and in desperate need of changing!