Fug or Fab: Maggie Gyllenhaal


fug-or-fab

I am confused and alarmed to report to you that, this WHOLE time, people were out there making a sequel to Nanny McPhee — that movie with Emma Thompson as the magical nanny who gets less hideous to the naked eye the more a family wants her but no longer needs her. Kind of like Mary Poppins but with boils, and a severe lack of jumping into sidewalk drawings and laughing one’s way to a ceiling tea party. For all I know, it’s an awesome series of movies — apparently it’s going to be a trilogy — but I was kind of freaked out by the makeup and the title of the movie is kind of annoying to me for reasons I can’t articulate, and I will only accept it the movie somehow also makes KATHARINE McPhee’s heinous blond hair gradually become more attractive. 

Anyway. Equally confusing: Maggie Gyllenhaal is in the sequel, and to the premiere, she wore this:
This seems sort of regular. I tend not to adore the one-sleeved stuff, but this has a flattering shape to it, and I think the fact that Maggie’s shoulders are rather nicely toned lends the whole thing an air of wearability. Overall, it neither overwhelmed nor underwhelmed me. I was merely whelmed. 
But what of that stuff on the side, which industry insiders refer to as “flappy hoo-ha”? Let’s investigate.

[Photo: WENN.com]

Aha. A peekaboo slip. While that creates a bit more interest, it also does this:
The frock has a weird shape when it moves, and suddenly inches itself toward Caftan Town (mayor: Dorothy Zbornak; population: Palm Beach, Florida). I like where it was going, but am deeply unsure of how it got there. Or is it the vice-versa? I feel like everyone in the background of this photo is thinking, “Hmm,” and, “I don’t…,” and “It’s…,” and the only time you ever want that last one in your life is if it’s uttered by a disheveled Michael Palin in a loin cloth and immediately followed by the theme song to Monty Python’s Flying Circus. If that all happened ten seconds from when this photo was taken, then I’ll loudly proclaim the outfit a hit. Until then, I’m mired in indecision and I need your helping hands.

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Comments (300):

  1. Sarah
    0

    She doesn’t have a bad body, but almost everything she wears seems shapeless, unflattering or just awful. I just want her to stop trying to look like she’s 70. Unless she actually *is* 70. But that may be more disturbing. Also, Betty White (who is older than that), has waaaay better fashion sense. I mean, really. Please Maggie G!

  2. Katharine
    0

    I would like it better with less frou-frou hoo-ha, AND without the strip of Elastoplast along the inside hem.

  3. Gina
    0

    I am sick of this asymmetrical crap. Either two sides of hoo-ha or no hoo-ha!

    Or better yet, make it a sleeveless, hoo-ha-less shift in a jewel tone like a peacock gree and we’re in business!

  4. China
    0

    On a side note, have you seen K. McPhee’s latest hair incarnation? It’s…different. http://www.peoplestylewatch.com/people/stylewatch/gallery/0,,20189915,00.html#20753034

  5. mary bethune
    0

    Maggie is not pretty enough to just wear anything; sorry, that was harsh. I don’t understand why she gets attention; she is not that good an actress and yet there she. Where is Emma Thompson, the worlds’ greatest actress?

  6. christine christine
    0

    But you guys! Look how pretty her face and skin and hair look! Doesn’t she get extra credit for that? Plus it’s not that mauve dress with exploding shoulders. And, GREAT shoes.

  7. sally
    0

    She looks like she’s at the tailor, wearing a half-completed dress. Or like she put her coat on funny. It’s a mess.

  8. tammy
    0

    Ugh. That looks like the kind of crap one of the bad designers on Project Runway might come up with.

  9. granny
    0

    No her face doesn’t look pretty at all, particularly with that red lipstick. I just can’t believe this is the same pretty woman from the Crazy Heart movie. It looks like her elderly mother.

  10. LadyHash
    0

    Yikes. That’s awful.

    And yet when I saw the pictures of the premiere, I didn’t notice Maggie’s dress. I was so overwhelmed by the hideousness of Emma Thompson’s dress which appears to be a homage to 80s parachute pants.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1260442/Nanny-McPhee-premiere-Emma-Thompson-upstaged-pig.html

  11. Liz
    0

    I had to choose “shove it up your hoo-ha” because I am a 12-year-old boy inside. However, my sense of humor aside, I don’t like it. I think I would like it if it got rid of the hoo-ha, and the accompanying ruffle. I had some indecision in the first picture that I think could be solved by getting rid of the ruffle and shortening the sleeve on the covered arm.

  12. Sandra
    0

    Who though a wearable Oreo cookie was a good idea? I mean, if were an *edible* wearable Oreo cookie, that’d be one thing. But this? Noooooo! Also, either shoulder/arm treatment would be perfectly fine if matched with its twin. This relationship of unequals looks silly. And side seams? They’re your friend Maggie. Embrace them.

  13. Cheryl
    0

    I don’t hate her shoes.

  14. Anonymous
    0

    You know what I find annoying? Emma T decided not to appear in Deathly Hallows so as to devote more time to Nanny freaking McPhee.

  15. Mara
    0

    Now do you see why this woman should still be in the running to be America’s Next Top Fugger?!? Dammit all…

  16. JackOfClubs
    0

    With or without the hoo-ha, it’s more sexagenarian than sexy. Her hair cut doesn’t help much, either. She’s a very pretty lady, with beautiful eyes, but all I see is neck muscles. I don’t know if it’s the cut of the dress, or what, but it just adds to the whole Centrum Silver vibe I’m getting from this.

  17. RP
    0

    Ok, I never comment on these things. But, FUG GIRLS, even ignoring all the hoo-ha, from the front, this looks like a plain old dress that SOMEONE FORGOT TO FINISH. This is *not* okay. Things don’t have to be perfectly symmetric, but this whole leave-a-sleeve thing is not okay. You should not stand for this. You have to start coming down harder on people who wear them or else– what other things will they start leaving off??

  18. Cecily
    0

    I have long been on record as AGAINST the missing limb dresses, so my brain registered a complete between-channels static once I saw this, and could not even consider the hoo-ha.

    And again, look how pretty she is, is there NO ONE OUT THERE WHO CAN HELP??

  19. ramona
    0

    FUG! She does’t have a own style! That dress is awefull!

    http://keepingupwithglamfashion.blogspot.com/

  20. Alisa
    0

    You know, if Maggie had just walked down the carpet holding the leash to the pig, we would have given her a pass on the dress.
    I mean, it worked for Emma Thompson, we all laughed at the pig and overlooked the wierd pleats/darts on her dress….

    Or maybe we could just do one big FUG or FAB poll that includes Maggie, Emma and the pig?!

  21. Stefanie
    0

    Aww come on! I like it!

  22. marcia
    0

    I agree that she should wear less shroud-like outfits to show off what appears to be, from the muscle tone of both legs and arms, a rockin’ bod.

  23. lamoll
    0

    SEE, Fug Friends? SEE?! We should have voted for Maggie’s fug in droves, not droplets! She almost always looks not-as-pretty-as-she-could-be and/or matronly and/or is wearing something from Great Aunt Petunia’s attic, if Aunt Petunia had been a hefty WWII Hollywood Canteen hostess and Maggie’s mom, say, altered all of Aunt Pet’s clothes for herself in anticipation of her career as a lion tamer in one of the smaller, regional circuses, but got distracted both from the altering, and the career, and then Maggie discovered the clothes and just sort of wears them — albeit with pretty good shoes and bad bright lipstick. She almost always looks fug in a really consistent way that is unflattering and sometimes downright strange, as with this odd dress. Maggie in 2011, FTW!

  24. wendy
    0

    It looks like two different dresses that were cut in half and then sewn together. I don’t mind one-shoulder dealios, but there is no relationship between what’s going on on the left and right halves of her body. Plus it’s shapeless and unflattering. Bums me out, b/c I think she’s very cool and lovely to look at, but she sure doesn’t know how to dress.

  25. Nate
    0

    GF always looks like a background artiste from a bad Lifetime drama based in WW2.

    She needs to stand up straight, start dressing her age (age appropriate doesn’t have to mean slutty, Maggie, it’s all good) and SMILE once in a while.

    She always looks so sneery- like she’s disgusted by the very concept of everyone else on the planet. Which is why is amuses me that she does so much promo. STAY HOME, MOODY CHOPS!!

    Maybe it’s just me tho and she’s lovely…

    Oh and the dress? I agree, it looks like a Project Runway attempt at ‘Avant Garde’ that fails miserably and ends up being floppy and ‘Meh’… move along, Mags.

    ~Nate. xxx

  26. gee_gee
    0

    I…can’t. I want to love her but she makes it so difficult.

    *sigh*

  27. Mellie
    0

    “But what of that stuff on the side, which industry insiders refer to as “flappy hoo-ha”? Let’s investigate.”

    You made me spit soda on my keyboard. I’d like a new keyboard and another soda, please.

  28. Rachel
    0

    I liked how the dress looked in the first picture…until I noticed that it looked like she forgot to shave her snow white armpit hair.

  29. vandalfan
    0

    Just sew up the side and lop off the lonely sleeve (or give it a tandem) and you’d have a fine little black dress. Throw on a belt or ribbon on the waist, add a nice long golden and/or silvery necklace, and Bob’s your uncle. The shoes are a yawn, add some colorful pumps or strappy, sparkly sandals. Extra demerits for the visible hem tape.

  30. Mellie
    0

    “But what of that stuff on the side, which industry insiders refer to as “flappy hoo-ha”? Let’s investigate.”

    You made me spit soda on my keyboard. I’d like a new keyboard and another soda, please.

  31. Soph
    0

    I don’t know. Part of me likes this, but I’d be more on board if it had a belt around it that was either the same color as the hoo-ha, or perhaps a really nice turquoise. The right shade of blue can solve lots of clothing mishaps.

  32. Annie
    0

    I actually like this for the most part – in motion it’s not at it’s best. But for Maggie, it’s well done.

    BUT…speaking of seeing Hoo Ha and what not, can we really be expected not to comment on Tori Spelling’s RAGING CASE OF CAMELTOE???

    I mean, those leggings look painful. Possibly dangerous.

  33. soapoperasinger
    0

    I also don’t like the 1950′s “pageboy” with the very contemporary cut of the dress.

  34. Mari
    0

    When she’s moving, it kind of gives off a graduation-gown vibe.

  35. soapoperasinger
    0

    I also don’t like the 1950′s “pageboy” with the very contemporary cut of the dress.

  36. soapoperasinger
    0

    I also don’t like the 1950′s “pageboy” with the very contemporary cut of the dress.

  37. djheydt
    0

    If that white underlayer were an *undergown*, that looked as if it were MEANT to be seen peeping out from the left side, it would be great. (In that case it would be exactly the same length as the black overgown, and it would not have l*a*c*e on its hem.) Instead, it looks like a slip, that was NOT meant to be seen peeping out from the left side. Thereby, it loses. So close, and yet so far. As C. S. Lewis put it, Nearly they stood who fall.

  38. Charlotte
    0

    I must agree with Annie

    Maggies dress would probably look better without the white stuff, but other than quite inoffensive and nice – I actually kinda like it.

    However – WHERE is the forum for the, as I see it, absolutely necessary discussion about what’s going on with dear old Tori’s leggings? No no no no NO – I am blinded and will not be able to sleep tonight with that image burned into my brain. How do you walk around and not sort of – you know – notice – that that sort of thing is going on around your lady garden? Well?

  39. Claire's mom
    0

    First shot: Bathing Suit Maggie spliced onto Sedate Modern Governess Maggie. Hmmm.

    Second shot: whoa. what?

    Third shot: floppy flappy, no no no.

    Why does this woman insist on being “mutton dressed as lamb” (as my English nana used to say about certain women dressing too young for their age) in COMPLETE and total reverse? Too much oldness/giant volumes of fabric. What is she hiding? Wings? A tail she’s had from birth and that her parents didn’t want to have removed so as to let her decide what she wanted to do with her body when she was old enough? Honey, decrepitude is going to get you – as it will all of us, except maybe George Hamilton – eventually. Why are you hastening its arrival???

  40. Jules
    0

    Not only does this look like a bad Project Runway idea, but it’s like a Project Runway dress when they have to go home at midnight on the first night, before the designer got to finish it for the runway show. Yeesh.

    Also, I know “Nanny McPhee” (as a title) annoys me because it immediately brings to mind crazypants Andie McPhee, Pacey’s girlfriend and Jack’s sister on Dawson’s. Not necessarily the best character to evoke.

  41. Anonymous
    0

    maybe if it had something holding the black part closed over the white part at waist level..?

    And while I don’t always mind one sleeved stuff with the same rabid ferocity that you do, I think this is too severe. There is just too MUCH sleeve on one side.

  42. oliviacw
    0

    The problem is, it’s not really missing a sleeve – it’s missing a whole seam! It flaps open way too much when Maggie walks and looks really like it’s about to fall off. If the flappiness was more constrained, it might rate as “interesting”, but in the current state it’s best described as unfinished.

  43. Sara L.
    0

    Yeah, not sure about that dress. I am sure that she should go shorter with her hair. That length is not helping anything. Chop chop, Maggie, chop chop!

  44. 'Mela
    0

    Can’t stand this woman’s bassett-hound face, her shrill voice, or her acting. Her one obvious plus is her physique, but she has no style. Phase-out, please!

  45. dee cee
    0

    She’s a stuck up pretense ..and always thinks aha! I am ready for my closeup without ever checking the mirror.

  46. Annie
    0

    Alas, Charlotte, I guess the discussion is, for the time being, left between the two of us.

    And I must say, Fug Girls, that I find it most inappropriate that this sort of discussion take place in a forum on a family-friendly movie about a nanny, but if you think that’s going to stop me…well, all I can say is you guys were the ones who started it with the whole “flappy hoo-ha” thing.

    Tori. Tori, Tori, Tori. I don’t understand. As Charlotte pointed out, how could you be unaware of that “situation” downstairs? Was it a lack of blood supply? Perhaps you lost all nerve sensation. I think this must be discussed in the interests of the public – who knows? prolonged legging usage in such a manner could lead to infertility. Lilo – are you listening???

  47. Danielle
    0

    Oh, Maggie G. I might like you if your hair wasn’t so AWFUL.

  48. Anika
    0

    I don’t get it. Why wear a dress that’s looks ok standing still but a hot mess when you walk? And I mean “ok” — not great or special or even pretty and certainly not fab.

    Ew.

    Also, Jules, I always think Andie, too, whenever I hear McPhee.

  49. Wren
    0

    I can’t decide if someone should start playing Pomp and Circumstance for her gaduation or if it just looks like the dressmaker forgot to finish it.

    I am so sick of one-sleeved dresses. It’s boring and seems to be the default flake-out for designers who haven’t a clue how to create an interesting neckline.

  50. Bambi Anne Dear
    0

    I really quite like this one but I couldn’t vote for fantabulous. I’m not keen on the one-sleeved look unless it’s on something that is fantabulous. And that’s probably going to be something in the evening gown section. I’m glad that at least Maggie looks better in all these pics, somehow she usually looks tired or ill. Maybe it’s the photos but…. She even looks sultry in that over-the-shoulder pose.
    I think maybe I’d like to see Jake try this on. He’s such a cutey he could make anything work. OK, I’m off to have another drink.

  51. pea soup
    0

    She doesn’t really do much for me. Her brother, on the other hand…(*drools*)

  52. NYCGirl
    0

    I find it neither fantabulous nor craptaculous. More like…meh-tabolic.

  53. Camille west coast
    0

    I’m perturbed. I’m in the minority that generally likes the asymmetrical one-sleeve look. But this mess–it reminds me, especially in side view, of the habits from Sister Act. All she needs is the winged hat.

    DJHedyt has it right–underdress in black. Also, get rid of that white strip inside the hem (what IS that?) and shorten it to just below the knees.

    Then, add some jewelry–the black is a little relentless.

  54. Sarah
    0

    I’m not a Maggie Hater but for some reason I think she misses it every time..

  55. Tina
    0

    Anonymous 1:52, I’m with you. The world needs Emma Thompson as Trelawney much more than it needs another Nannny McPhee.

    As for Maggie’s dress, I agree with the others that it looks unfinished. From the last picture, it looks like an open wrap dress.

  56. Kris
    0

    It is always wonderful to start the morning laughing my @ss off!! Between the hoo-ha and the comments, I am having a hard time being quiet and restrained at work!!
    This dress is hideous. It looks like she was on the stand at the tailors and suddenly realized, “Sh!t! I have to be at that premiere NOW!?” Totally unfinished mess. I an not partial to the one sleeved thing either. I’m definitely ready for that to be dunzo.
    Maggie doesn’t offend me, as an actress or a person – she was funny on Ellen the other day – but photos of her tend to make her look kind of sneery, world weary.

  57. Danielle Lilly
    0

    I say just rip off the sleeve and she’s good to go. I’m more concerned with Tori’s camel toe than Maggie here.

  58. melanie
    0

    i don’t even know what the hell this thing is that she’s wearing. sorry.

  59. CAT
    0

    Looks like she forgot to put her left arm through the sleeve. No likey.

  60. Christine
    0

    “Overall, it neither overwhelmed nor underwhelmed me. I was merely whelmed.”

    Thanks for the “10 Things I Hate About You” reference. :-)

  61. Liz
    0

    Maggie Gyllenhaal frustrates me. She’s a very beautiful woman, she’s in great shape, and yet she insists on dressing like someone’s grandma in 1977. I don’t know if this is just a recent development in her style, but the mom haircut and the old lady shoes and the unflattering cut of many of her dresses just bums me out! This outfit isn’t so terrible, but I think the construction is sloppy. I think I would have liked it better if those awkward black cut-away pieces weren’t flopping in the wind. Cut those things down! I really like the peek-a-boo slip concept, but I think it would have worked better on something that wasn’t asymmetrical and more tailored – this way it looks like an accident. So ditch the sleeve and add some hoo-ha to the other side. I believe in you, Maggie! Fire your stylist!

    As for asymmetrical anything… I don’t mind it when it’s a short-sleeved look, but long-sleeved asymmetrical outfits always look like someone forgot to finish sewing the dress together. The only notable exception I can find to this rule is Freida Pinto’s Galliano gown from last year’s Oscars, but that’s because the sleeve was embellished enough that it didn’t look boring and weird.

  62. Jen
    0

    Well, yes… it’s unfortunate, but I love the shoes – very sexy. Let’s give her some points for that – because I like her.

  63. Livilla
    0

    Hm. The dress almost works for me. I’ll give a pass to the one-sleevedness. What kills it is asymmetrical hem and the poorly thought out layering. She’s a great looking woman so this is a frustrating misfire. The shoes are quietly sexy.

    Here’s the thing with Maggie G. She’s a low-key beauty. Who knows what she’s “really” like, but in public she’s self-possessed. A bit serious. So she’s gotta watch the tendency to pick matronly outfits. Maggie. You’re a YOUNG WOMAN, not Margaret DuMont!

  64. DIANE
    0

    These one-sleeved dresses are becoming ridiculous and boring. This one looks like a work in progress she stole from a mannequin whilst breezing through the workshop of some b-list designer with questionable talent.

  65. Janette
    0

    Ha. One of my favorite movie lines ever: “I know you can be overwhelmed, and I know you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be, like,…whelmed?”

  66. gigi
    0

    oh Maggie… thank g-d you’re slim! whew… I love that last shot of her mid-stride– just beaming! as the people behind look on/ in Maggie’s head the collective sentiment is: ‘work it Maggie!’ while in reality it’s more like: ‘what the blue blazes??’ oh Maggie…

  67. Sarah Rogers
    0

    I think you can be whelmed in Europe…

    CLASSIC 10 Things, I actually watched that today. Can we make Kat an unofficial hero of GFY?

  68. Beamer
    0

    It looks like she’s wearing one of those wrap dresses from the 70s but she doesn’t know that’s what it is so she’s just letting the wrap-around part dangle.

    And I agree with Annie – Tori Spelling looks like she should be in a lot of pain! I didn’t think to look though – are comments open over there? Because if they’re not, they should be.

  69. Ally
    0

    I couldn’t bear to watch the movie because of the make-up either.

    Another thing that bugs me about it/them: Emma Thompson’s character on Cheers was called Nanny McG. So hello being bankrupt in the naming things department.

    Also, she was too much of a snoot to reprise the role in the last season of Frasier (Roseanne’s TV sister played it instead.)

    For all those reasons, I second your thumbs-down on the whole concept of these movies. Also, what’s with Thompson’s sow’s ear purse at the premiere?

  70. Sandy
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    I just about always hate her clothes,
    and honestly I think she’s just kind of fugly head to toe.

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    Thinking if the dress was sleeveless, as in no left sleeve AND no right sleeve, it wuld not be that bad at all.

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    It looks like she’s wearing one of those wrap dresses from the 70s but she doesn’t know that’s what it is so she’s just letting the wrap-around part dangle.

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