Fug the Show: Revenge recap

This show. It is such a hot mess. Parts of the most recent two episodes were genuinely interesting and emotional: poor Amanda dying after (stupidly) going back onto an exploding boat to rescue an accessory; Victoria shooting WhatsHerName NoOneCares to protect Daniel from being framed for something Unnamed But Terrorist-y; Emily crying through Jack and Amanda’s wedding. And parts of them were just mind-numbingly boring/dumb: the whole blah blah blah about the Stowaway; everything else that ever happened involving the Initiative, ever; Conrad deciding to run for governor despite being a MURDERER whose son was also arrested for MURDER, a TERRORIST, a man whose wife was kidnapped under weird circumstances, and an inveterate cheater, who ALSO knows that basically ALL of this information is ON TAPE SOMEWHERE. There is literally no one in the world less electable. He is a moron, and if he GETS elected, the shows thinks we too are morons. People’s political careers get sidetracked if they don’t pay their housekeeper properly, much less IF THEY MIGHT HAVE BLOWN UP A PLANE, FRAMED A DUDE, AND THEN HAD HIM SHIVVED.

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Comments (20):

  1. Annie E

    Not even Victoria shooting Helen could keep me from quitting this show last week, and I’m quite glad I did!

  2. Esmerelda

    Have Jack’s eyebrows always been so aggressively groomed? Is it just more noticeable in the douche suit with a cleanly shaved face? Why are all of Victoria’s dresses so tight? Hey costume people- go up a size! And Nolan’s pants are just the right amount of tight, he just ruined the lines by jamming his hands into the pockets.

  3. Breda

    Hey, it’s Owen from Torchwood! And he ALWAYS looks evil. His face is just like that.

  4. Barbara

    Why would Amanda wear white to a wedding? HUGE faux pas!

  5. drlemaster

    I mainly read these for the titles, but “…Victoria has figured out that Lady Initiative McSnoozeville is something something Daniel terrorism something something something, and now they’re screwing with her because of Reasons.” may be the finest sentence you guys have yet written. Thank you so much for these fugcaps.

  6. Vandalfan

    When I saw this, my first thought was “Wasn’t that one cancelled?” and the next was “So where’s the evil twin, in Paris still?” Frankly, this episode sounded thrilling.

    Big bonus points for the titles. They are fine handbags and fine shoes to compliment the gowns of recap.

  7. crookedE

    When they zoomed in on One Tree Hill’s face peering out the porthole, I literally LOLed.

  8. Naomi

    SPOILER ALERT, oh right, too late. thanks y’all! I’m gonna ruin the shit out of Downton Abbey next season.

    love, an angry Brit.

    (just kidding*, this show is whack.)

    *I’m not kidding.

    • Heather

      This episode aired five days ago. Our policy is — for general edification — if anything is that old, we’re absolved of all guilt. Anyone who’s trying to stay unspoiled but still reads beyond the headline of a recap post has kind of dug their own grave, no?

  9. kelly

    I’m pretty sure the only reason I keep watching this show is to read your posts about it. Thank you for crawling into my brain and spewing everything out much funnier. The storyline is completely out of control and I don’t care about anyone. The clothes aren’t even that impressive anymore.

  10. Caitlin

    Wait, is BURN GORMAN on this show now? Because if he is I might actually have to watch an episode instead of learning all about it via your recaps.

  11. jj

    YIPPEE! The Fugcaps are superb! We CHEERED when Morticia shot the Initiatrix and howled with GLEE when Fauxmanda blew up with the SS Amanda. I guess I will miss Ms. Initiative’s slowly lowering the limo window. I will NOT miss Fauxmanda and only wish the BORING BAR blew up instead. With Declan and Charlotte inside.

  12. Robert

    While he is tremendously unelectable, you have the luxury of forgetting about the governor of Florida.

  13. Melanie Woodall

    Great fugcap! As much as I like Aiden, I so very much Emily back with Jack. But, this show is getting cracktacular.

  14. Sajorina

    I had to quit this show after it got too silly/weird for me! So sad… A horrible plot ruined one of my interior design & fashion pleasures!

  15. Kaeleigh

    What does it say about me that when that speedboat first entered the fray I immediately thought about what kind of reference you all would make to Ringer? So pleased.

  16. hipsterhobos

    I liked the dresses Victoria was wearing but the dark lipstick made her look like she was wearing a mask. Why is Nolan still giving Padma a chance? Her story line is boring. That sliced finger in a box doesn’t prove it belonged to her father. Even if it did they could have kept it on ice until they were ready to deliver it. Come on, Aiden you’re smarter than that. I think.

    Helen’s replacement is super creepy in a Crispin Glover I-can’t-move-my-face-because-of-too-much-Botox kind of way. Maybe Conrad can have some kind of accident to end his ridiculous political ambitions before they begin.

    That was the best photo bomb ever of the murderous Ryan brother on the boat. Faux Amanda should have kept the gun under her dress somehow instead of leaving it where that dude could take the bullets out.

  17. Marybeth

    These Revenge posts make me laugh so hard!! My fiancé reads the Dallas posts bc he works for Turner & it cracks him up!!! Thanks for making me laugh! :-D

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